Feedback: New fic idea?

[Chris 2.1]

Well when on a train the other week I had a pretty interesting idea for a Pokemon Fic. I haven't written much Pokemon recently but the idea has been mildly developed and I wondered about feedback.

The idea goes like this.

Jade, a bubbly girl living in our world, is somehow transported to the Pokemon World, where she meets aspiring Pokemon Trainer Brendan. With Jade being utterly petrified of any nearby Pokemon, Brendan takes her under his wing and does his best to teach her about Pokemon while he tries to cope with his Pokemon Training.

Ok so it's a general idea with a weak twist. I liked the idea of mature Brendan meeting exuberant Jade, and her lack of knowledge towards Pokemon could be somewhat amusing. Of course, there would have to be something more than that.

Any thoughts?

[mr_pikachu]

I think I've seen a few fics like this in the past, though none of them went very deep into the plot to my knowledge. It'd be nice to see how this scenario would actually play out. However, you might want to add some more twists to make it fresh. I'm a bit curious how the shift of Jade's character from "bubbly" to "petrified" would work. All in all, I think it'd be a good fic to read if executed well, and you're probably one of the best around, Chris.

[mistysakura]

It's got some originality, could be very interesting if done well. Jade's change of attitude (bubbly vs. petrified), and how Brendan would react to someone who didn't know Pokemon existed, would give some interest, but it wouldn't really sustain for a long time. I feel that it needs a bit more purpose though, something to keep the story moving along. Like a goal to be reached (unless it's the old collect badges and become a Pokemon champion thing).

But it's not like I have any practical ideas, so good luck.

[Chris 2.1]

Thanks guys. Mr Pikachu: the best around? I'm not too sure about that :P

Well as you've both rightly said there isnt much to the fic which is what makes it an 'in-development' project atm. Brendan's badge-thing would be boring and so my initial idea is that when he meets Jade has has say 4 or 5 badges and we see the last 3. Obviously I'd need some sort of backbone to it but that's all I have so far. The idea was a Pokemon transports Jade to [insert Continent] but of course it could be the work of some Antagonists. Perhaps a group of Scientists, or a single person (No Team ___, they're so boring). Maybe even Pokemon as antagonists....I'm not sure.

It's still a work in progress.

[mr_pikachu]

I've seen it done a few different ways. The two that I most vividly remember were a weird portal that a guy walked through and an apocalyptic event that left the main character falling through a massive chasm in the earth and somehow into the world of Pokemon. I also saw one fic awhile back where Pokemon suddenly started appearing in our world, and animals from our world appeared in place of Pokemon in the Pokemon world, freaking out both groups. The point is that there are potentially an infinite number of ways it could be done; you just have to come up with a good one. And the idea certainly needs a deeper plotline than the initial idea. (I believe a lack of one killed just about all the fics I've read that used this concept.)

Oh, and I didn't say you were necessarily the best. (I'm not saying you're not the best either, but you'd definitely have competition for that award.) You're certainly one of the most accomplished fanficcers on the forum, as far as I can tell. ;)

[Chris 2.1]

Mr P: Why thank you :D.

I have been coming up with a few ideas thus far, something unique and something satisfyingly plausible at the same time. Portals and magic energy fields just don't appeal to me :P. I'm thinking of something...but I need to wrk things out a bit more first.

And at every oppertunity I've been thinking of locations, and more backbone etc. I'd like to have a new location for the fic instead of Kanto/Johto Hoenn...but to be honest Hoenn's varied landscape makes it a pretty versatile place so I'm considering it.

[Lady Vulpix]

It can be good if you put some thought into who's responsible for Jade's presence there and what s/he wants with her (or doesn't want with her, in case it was an accident). Jade could end up involving Brendan in her problems without knowing it. It would also be interesting to see how Brendan reacts to her, and how their relationship evolves throughout the fic (I'm not saying they have to fall in love, I'm just saying that I'd expect some things to change as they get to know each other and get used to each other's company).

[Chris 2.1]

Thanks for the feedback Lady V. I agree that a portion of the story may involve why Jade is there - who sent her, how, why, etc, and how her character clashes with that of Brendan, who is going to be perhaps less bubbly than her. Jade is going to have an impact on Brendans life as she is thrown into his without any real choice.

I am still thinking of ideas, but a new idea cropped up which would be a twist on the normal Gym system. Instead of Gyms, trainers in this reigon travel to the various Schools around. Each School will be rather like Earl's Training Academy and teaches a specific trait (like Attack, Defence, combos, double battles etc) and a Trainer would battle the Head Boy/Girl (or perhaps even the Headmaster) and if they won, they would be awarded a medal in that particular catagory of battling. Once a certain number were collected you could progress to a league (Perhaps you would only need 6 medals, as there would be so many different ones thinkable - evolution, pre-evolution, attack, defence, sp attack and sp defence, loyalty, double battles, combos, specific types....).

The idea could be that Brendan already has two or three medals. The progression to other Schools would probably be much more of a side-story while also being important to Brendan. I don't know whether or not I would write up how he does in the League - if he got there, that is.

I'll think up some more on Jade over the next few days.

[Chris 2.1]

Ok I have another problem. I have a good, solid idea behind why Jade gets taken away, how, etc all, but...well I'm not sure I want to share it with people for feedback because it would take away a lot of the story if you knew what happened. So what should I do? Carry on and begin writing parts of it, or what? I'm confused.

[Tainted]

Get to writing it and stop leaving us in so much god-damned suspense.

Adieu,
Zak Hunter

[mr_pikachu]

Some people like to have friends in Fanfic do a little "beta-reading" for them. That often can help clear up possible problems. I've never had a beta-reader myself, but several other writers on the boards have.

Or, there's always the old "Let's try this and see what happens" approach. That's always fun. :D

[Chris 2.1]

Sounds like a good suggestion Zach. I may start writing it soon.

[Tainted]

It's Zak with a k. Like Zakk Wild the guitarist-- except not quite as wild.

Adieu,
Zak Hunter

[Chris 2.1]

Noted :biggrin: