<Game> Twisted Wishes v.5 (M.A. LV)

[mr_pikachu]

Okay, it's time for version #5 of Twisted Wishes!


What happens is, the first person will make a wish...

I wish my soda wasn't warm.

Then the next person tries to twist that wish to warp what the first person receives. Then he/she posts a new wish...

Granted. Now it's boiling!

I wish I was the king of the world.

And the process continues to repeat itself.

Granted, now you have thousands of assassins trying to kill you.

Please abide by the PCG forum rules ( http://www.pokemasters.net/forums/showthread.php?t=12693) as well as the general TPM rules.


Let's get it started!

I wish that it was Friday.

[Toxicity]

Granted, but it will require time travel that takes about 22 hours.

I wish North America had more available colors for the DS Lite.

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted, but in order to get one of these DS, you have to sell all your possessions, sign all your body parts on a donor list and sell your soul. You will soon have a DS with a color never seen by anybody before ... but somebody wants your eyes, ears and fingers just before you receive it. So now you can't see it, hear about it or feel it. But it was worth it, wasn't it?

I wish that I had super speed so I can complete all my chores on Chore Wars really fast.

[Fett One]

Granted but you move so fast that you can never slow down, so you have to spend the rest of your life with everyone looking like statues since you are moving so fast

I wish for a machine gun

[AdventureSerum]

Granted, but it's vivid pink and doesn't work.

I wish to be able to play guitar.

[Toxicity]

Granted, but rather than the actual guitar, you'll only be able to play Guitar Hero.

I wish I played the alto sax rather than the trumpet.

[Ghost]

Granted, however, all your fingers fall off in a tragic accident.

I wish I had a pony.

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted, but it is one of those small ponies who produces a lot of extrament.

I wish I was best buds with Strong Bad and the Cheat.

[Fett One]

Granted but they treat you worst than Strong Sad

I wish for a sword that could never be broken or dulled

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, I kill you with that sword and it gets stuck.

I wish I never had to use dictionary again.

[Toxicity]

Granted, but your vocabulary will be small due to the incapability of using a new word unless given the definition.

I wish I didn't have a photographic memory.

[Magmar]

Granted, but now you don't have a memory at all!

I wish my throat wasn't sore.

[darktyranitar]

Granted. It'll be suffering a terrible sensation of burning instead.

I wish Weasel Overlord was online at this time.

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted, but he only gets on to mock you whenever you do something.

I wish I had some earmuffs that would block out sound.

[Fett One]

Granted but the earmuff's are permamately attached to your ears, essentially leaving you deaf for the rest of your life

I wish for more things to wish for

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but then you must post here all the day.

I wish we wouldn't take granting wishes for granted.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, everybody holds onto their wishes forever. Unfortunatly since no one else can see them the people making wishes are deemed insane and dealt as such.

I wish I could sleep

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted, but you sleep for a long time that when you wake up, you have missed every important event in your life. And catching up will never work. So you agree to put yourself in cryo-statis for all of eternity so you will never ever have to worry about life again.

I wish I was friends with Q.

[Fett One]

Granted but he turns you into a dog, thus making you man's best friend

I wish I could figure out how to do things just like McGuyver

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but you cannot figure out anything McGuyver doesn't.

I wish Finland sent more troops to Afganistan.

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but those troops would then be in danger of being killed by terrorists.

I wish I had a number of wishes equal to the number of people existing in the world.

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted, but a nuclear wipes ou everybody on the planet except you. so now only have one wish. And you can't wish that everybody was alive again because they would be revived as zombies and chase for all of eternity.

I wish Freddy, Jason and Chucky were stuck in a cage match to determine who is the top scarer/killer.

[Fett One]

Granted but all 3 of them end up dead so there is no winner

I wish for a never ending vacation

[darktyranitar]

Granted, but he only gets on to mock you whenever you do something.

Ah, this is not the first time...

Granted, but you'll soon find out that a long vacation is actually quite boring. Have fun being bored for the rest of your life.

I wish I have some cookie with me at the moment.

[Magi of all]

Granted, but the cookies are very hot and drop on you from the sky for all eternity

I wish I could fly

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but a hunter mistakes you for a duck and shoots you.

I wish I knew if I had grammatical mistakes in this post.

[Fett One]

Granted, you just need to wait for mr_pikachu to show his face in this game

I wish mr_pikachu will return to playing this game

[Crystalmaster Mike]

Granted, he returns for one more post before moving to the SPPf Forums for all internity.

I wish I could throw away stuff more easily, e.g. so that I didn't have like 400+ e-mails on all my e-mail accounts put together!

[AdventureSerum]

Granted, you are unable to do anything with them but throw them away, even before you read them.

I wish I could run old video games on new computers.

[Fett One]

Granted but doing so causes your computer to get hit with 10,000 viruses

I wish the internet access was 100% free

[Crystalmaster Mike]

Granted, now you have to pay 1000% more for your electricity bill.

I wish the time it would take to travel to exoplanets could be shorted to less than the human lifespan.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but that kind of spaceships cost more and more.

I wish they published Tekken 6 soon.

[Fett One]

Granted but the game is incomplete due to it being rushed to come out sooner

I wish for a new star wars movie to come out and for it to be better than all 6 movies combined

[Crystalmaster Mike]

Granted but the movie is just about stars crashing into each other (literally "star wars"), and it lasts 5 hours, 47 minutes, 23 seconds.

I wish the new Heroes web comic would come out today.

[firepokemon]

Granted,but then the final panel says. Shows Over fuckfaces come back in another 3000 years (okay so that is fucking lame but fuck you).

I wish my mouth was washed out with soap.

[Fett One]

Granted but you die from accidently swallowing some soap

I wish to own a swimming pool

[Crystalmaster Mike]

Granted, but it's just large enough to put your feet in, nothing else.

I wish I had less things to wish for.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but now you have nothing to post here.

I wish I was an Emperor of China.

[Fett One]

Granted but your reign only lasted 1 hour

I wish to live in a mansion

[Crystalmaster Mike]

Granted, but it's Barby's Girly-Pink-Fluff Summer Mansion.

I wish to write a book.

[Master of Paradox]

Granted, but nobody will ever read it.

I wish I wasn't so apathetic.

[Fett One]

Granted, you are now mean spirited to everyone, which causes you to have no friends

I wish parents would stop complaining about video game violence

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, they stop complaining when you give up with them.

I wish Denmark had no nuclear weapons.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted I now have all of Denmark's nuclear weapons

I wish there were no nuclear weapons

[Fett One]

Granted but you now no longer possess Denmarks nuclear weapons, since they no longer exist

I wish all people were friendly

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but then the unfriendly aliens from outer space come.

I wish I received more PMs.

[Crystalmaster Mike]

Granted, here's a Purple Melon for you.

I wish I won the Award for Most Random Member.

[Fett One]

Granted but someone steals the award from you

I wish to become a famous voice actor

[firepokemon]

Granted you become a famous voice actor and you get all types of roles including Pixar, Dreamworks, some anime, heh even Pokemon. However all that voicework damages your throat and you begin to sound like a horse with something up it. Sorry but your voice work is over.

I wish trees grew money.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, you plant trees like those in your back yard and get lots of money. You gather it for years to save money to buy the whole New Zealand but once you reach the amount needed you are walking in your back yard and one large tree falls straight on you crushing you and killing you. Also, it's important to remember that money does not make you happy.

I wish I was world famous.

[Fett One]

Granted but your frame only lasts 15 minutes

I wish for a new season of Seinfield

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but it will never make it to DVD, so the only way you'll be able to watch an episode again and again is if you record it on tape.

I wish I could put music from a cassette or record (LP) onto CDs.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, you get the info from me how to plug your casette played in a computer and how to use a recorder program, but you'll have to sell your soul to me as a reward.

I wish I had 1,000,000,000 dollars so that I could pay you all trips to Finland and have a TPM meeting here.

[darktyranitar]

Granted. Problem is, you don't have enough money to send us back, so we are now stuck in Finland. Good luck in coping with our constant ranting and lecturing.

I wish I wasn't so depressed at the moment.

[Knight of Time]

Granted, you will become the happiest person in the world, but your happiness will lead to gradual boredom.

I wish that every day was like a weekend.

[Fett One]

Granted but since most people don't work on weekends they are now permantly unemployed

I wish there was no need for money

[Master of Paradox]

Granted. Nothing is for sale. The nation collapses into anarchy.

I wish I had a banjo.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but as you were sent to Finland with the other TPMers now you make us all hear it and as if the Finnish music wasn't enough, we get bored on banjo, too.

I wish the moderators of TPM had their own countries to rule.

[mr_pikachu]

Granted. A civil war in RPG results in skirmishes with OA. Fanfic, GD, and the Games forums try to stay out of the conflict, but once Miscellaneous gets caught in the crossfire, a full-blown war of the forums develops. In the end, Hypotenuse drops the ASB bomb, and nuclear winter eradicates all life on this planet.

I wish my arm wasn't still in pain.

[Fett One]

Granted, the pain gets transferred to your back, which prevents you from sitting in a chair, which makes playing video games, using a computer, and many other things extremely difficult to do.

I wish all humans were turned into cyborgs and still get to keep their free will.

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but there would be nobody around to do anything if the cyborgs went berserk.

I wish I could invent helpful robots for mankind.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, but they are all wiped out by a horrible virus

I wish that viruses didn't exist

[Fett One]

Granted but now there are bacteria epidemics

I wish people couldn't go blind and deaf

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, the word blind never existed, but that's sad for me because my favourite Heavy Metal band is Blind Guardian!

I wish Vladimir Putin joined TPM.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, but he becomes more popular then you and you get rejected by everyone.

I wish Mikachu Yukitatsu wouldn't get rejected by people

[Fett One]

Granted but now you get rejected instead

I wish all tv shows were good

[darktyranitar]

Granted. They get so good that people can't decide which show they should be watching.

I wish I don't have to take any exams through college.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted. Your tutors completely forget the tests. However, without doing tests you never have to read the books required and you get no ability to test your skills. Eventually everyone thinks you have good papers but that is not true since you know nothing. As a result, you'll get a high-payed and responsible job but get fired instantly becuase your boss notices you can do nothing.

I wish I didn't make so long posts.

[mr_pikachu]

Granted. It's hard to post at all when you're six feet under. (Computers don't get very good Wi-fi reception underground, you see.)

I wish I could visit my girlfriend more often.

[Fett One]

Granted but you visit her so much that she gets sick of you seeing you so she dumps you.

I wish to possess super powers

[Toxicity]

Granted, yet you still don't know how to shot web (http://i182.photobucket.com/albums/x88/INinja-dThisAlbum/howdoishotweb.jpg).

I wish I wasn't feeling frustrated right now.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but you'll get out of it just by killing someone.

I wish I wasn't taken too seriously.

[Fett One]

Granted, no one takes you seriously ever again

I wish pokemon and digimon can coexist

[Toxicity]

Granted, but bad trainers would be pitting their newly-caught Pikachu against Garurumon, and chaos would ensue.

I wish to be the little girl (http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/1/1a/Mootmootmooot.jpg).

[Trekkie]

Granted, but you're so little, nobody sees you
I wish I weren't bound by the laws of robotics

[Fett One]

Granted, every robot tries to kill you since the the rule to not hurt humans doesn't apply to you anymore

I wish the Transformers sequal has the dinobots and soundwave in it

[Trekkie]

Granted, but the secret 4th law of robotics is passed and alien robots are now not allowed to come to Earth
I wish that I could escape with Optimus Prime when he finds out about the law so that the Earthbots can't hurt me

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

EDIT: Granted, but I don't know much about Transformers so I don't know how.

(Trekkie was too fast, I just granted Fett One's wish to see Trekkie already posted)

I wish my current crush became my girlfriend.

[Trekkie]

sorry I beat you to it, but oh well
granted, but her reputation is ruined when she tells everyone she is dating a Pokemaster
I wish I had Infinite # posts, to brag on milestone thread

[Dark-San]

Granted. But the computer systems could not recognized infinite as a number and hence promptly read it as zero.

Congrats! Despite putting all the efforts to acquire that amount of posts, all is in vain.

I wish being a Pokemaster is a good enough thing for people to brag about. (In this way, Mikachu's future girlfriend would not have a hard time of facing people.)

[Fett One]

Granted but you only get bragging rights for teh first 2 days. After that you get treated like scum

I wish Family Guy would do an Empire Strikes Back episode

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, it takes place in Real Life and Luke Skywalker kills you.

I wish for a good Finnish translation of Naruto manga.

[Dark-San]

Granted. You become the chief translator for the manga but then there was nobody else in the fansubbing group to assist you. Hence, you have to do all the stuffs and the quality of the manga comes out to be worse than expected.

I wish the OA forum could be a little more active.

[Fett One]

Granted but it's all spam

I wish to become a jedi

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but according to my last grant, you kill yourself because I said Luke kills you.

I wish Dark-san and Fett One took part in Whack-a-TPMer.

[Dark-San]

Granted. But Dark-san realises that examinations are more important than thinking on how to play an online forum game, hence he puts it aside for another week after the examinations ended before deciding on whether to play. Fett One on the other hand decides that he had better things to do like doing artifact excavations in Egypt.

I wish Mikachu would whack himself in his own Whack-a-TPMer game.

[Fett One]

Granted. Mikachu Yukitatsu, gets kicked off of TPM forever for committing suicide in a game

I wish the battery life in the Nintendo DS would last twice as long

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but then you start liking PSP more.

I wish Singapore switched places with Sweden so Dark-San could visit me at ease.

[Dark-San]

Granted. But unfortunately the only person, who can do this, is only God (or whatever you believe in). The problem is that he is too busy listening to the other 3.9999999 billions of prayers that he forgotten to grant your wish.

I wish Singapore does get to the size of Sweden. In this way, we do not have to worry about the space constraint.

[Fett One]

Great but all of the neighboring countries nuke Singapore for expanding pass its borders

I wish TPM had a bigger variety of emoticons

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, but they take over the forums with their emoticoness

I wish I had more time

[Knight of Time]

/\ Granted, the next person who posts will post the word time 50 times.

I wish I always had a good sense of humour.

[Dark-San]

Granted. You are humourous but then again, you live in a world filled with bores like me. Despite how many jokes or pranks you pulled on us, we never express our emotions. Soon, you got bored of yourself and join in the ranks of us, bores.

I wish I could time travel into the past and change my past, if I could.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but you end up in another dimension that you cannot get out.

I wish for more friends.

[darktyranitar]

Granted. And it turns out that your friends are the 'with friends like this, who need enemies' kind of friends.

I wish I didn't have to go to college for the second semester.

[Dark-San]

Granted. You dropped out of the college and go on to become my servant.

"Now dt, clean the bathtub!"

"After you are done with that chore, remember to wipe the windows!"

"Come here now dt, where is the detergent?"

"And also have you finished up on the bathtub cleaning?"

I wish darktyranitar did not made that earlier wish.

[Fett One]

Granted, instead he wished for you to be his servant

I wish slavery never existed

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but then there would have been no pyramids in Egypt, and you would have re-wrote Bible history.

I wish that people would read a Bible as often as they could.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, but then some devout people start trying to get everyone who doesn't to read the bible to read it in a really annoying way like sending them junk mail and toilet papering houses.

I wish I had a big, jelly, apple crumble. chocolate coated, harmless Mikachu. mmmmmm Mikachu.

[darktyranitar]

Granted. Turns out this is one of those food that you have to eat it before it eats you. And it's armed with a mallet too. Bon appetite!

I wish I have a jelly to eat right now.

[Dark-San]

*Hints*

Ever watched Ghostbuster?

Granted. The 'jelly' that you are eating turns out to be a filthy green slim. You remembered that little green slim monster from Ghostbuster?

Yes, you are feasting on that poor fellow now!

I wish they had a repeat of the Ghostbuster movie series.

[Knight of Time]

Granted. All the ghosts from the movies suddenly appear in the real world, MINUS the Ghostbusters, so nobody stands a chance of eliminating them.

I wish people would watch Fairly Odd Parents today.

[Fett One]

Granted but it causes everyone to have a seizure

I wish for a free sample of pizza

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Hehehee Crazy Elf Boy and eating me!

Granted, but it contains for some reason my meat and it does not taste good. What's more, I had to be killed before they can make it for you.

I wish I could make a Wikipedia entry for Mielikkitalo so everyone, including you guys, would know what it is.

[Toxicity]

Granted, but there's most likely nobody outside of Finland that would look up the article without knowing the name.

I wish I could get out of Tallahassee for good.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, but every other place you go into miraculasy turns into another Tallahassee so your trapped forever.

I wish I had a time machine

[Dark-San]

Granted. But then, HG Wells thinks that someone else is more worthy of this machine than you are. Hence he willed the time machine to me instead.

I wish I know what to do with the time machine from CEB.

[Knight of Time]

Granted. You use the time machine, but because of a malfunction, it causes you to cease to exist.

I wish I had a bite of the world's biggest hamburger.

[Fett One]

Granted but you get food posioning from that one bite

I wish to become a vampire but have none of the weaknesses

[Dark-San]

Granted. But when you went for your biannually dental checkup, the dentist was so upset that your two distinctive vampire teeth is blocking his view, when he tries to inspect your molars. Without a thought, he took out his pliers and yank out the two teeth.

I wish the next person to post has something to say about me.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted. I post this autobiography of mine we were talking about in Questions Only in the Miscellaneous Stuff. Now what does that have to do with you? Well I just change the name there from 'Mikachu Yukitatsu' to 'Dark-San'. Now everyone thinks you are a lunatic, Pokémon-crazy, bad-tasted, bad English speaking Finn with wicked relationships with Crazy Elf Boy and mr_pikachu.

I wish those attributes of mine were considered good things.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, You are now very loved by the entire internet community especially Mr Pikachu

I wish I could get a decent nights sleep

[Dark-San]

Granted. Its 1am, I put you in a comfortable bed and sing a lullaby before I called it a night. You feel satisfied and fail to realized that I put up an alarm clock set to 2am. Have a decent sleep for only an hour! ^.^

I wish my alarm clock would not spoiled that easily.

[Fett One]

Granted, a power failure causes your alarm to shut off

I wish to have a DVD recorder so that I can record tv shows

[Knight of Time]

Granted. On your first use of your new DVD recorder, when you try to record your favourite show, the thing short circuits.

I wish my next wish was un-twistable.

[Dark-San]

Granted. It would then be boring and have no utter use to you. Because it is boring, no one here bothers to twist it and give it to you.

I wish the airtime here would screen more American sitcoms. I am already bored with the local shows.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but who will see the Finnish ones, then?!?

Ai vis vii kut vrait inklish tis vei

(a more 'Finnish' way to write: I wish we could write English this way)

[Fett One]

Granted but no one can understand it which throws the world into choas, which it can never hope to recover from

I wish people would stop lying

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but without lie detectors, lies would be impossible to detect.

I wish I was a courtroom judge.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, but since you always give biased unfair decisions you get lynched by a mob of angry people.

I wish.............

[Fett One]

Granted, you have been turned into a .

I wish Crazy Elf Boy made an actual wish

[Heald]

Granted, you have been turned into a .

I wish Crazy Elf Boy made an actual wish

Granted. He wished you had cancer. In the head. Head cancer.

I wish for new curtains. These ones suck.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, but the new curtain keep trying to kill you, your fault I guess from buying them from a curtain store built on an indian burial ground.

I wish people would stop using the cheap old evil thing from shops built on indian burial ground scenarios in movies.

[Fett One]

Granted, instead they use items that they stole from Heald house

I wish magic was real

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, in a new Final Fantasy game, there will be a magic spell called 'real'.

I wish you laughed at this grant of mine.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, but since its so lame his head explodes.

I wish Mikachu would stop using Final Fantasy references in Twisted wishes

[Knight of Time]

Granted. Instead, he decides to make references to games rated M, all of which drive you crazy.

I wish that there was more security in video game areas of department stores.

[Dark-San]

Granted. They employed bouncers, who tried to filter off potential customers, by blocking their way and not permitting those game freaks from buying what they want. This solve the problem of eradicating security problems from the stall but it does not help in reaping profits. In the end, the stall close down and your favourite gaming pastime is officially gone for good.

I wish that my laptop had not gone haywired back days ago.

[Fett One]

Granted, the fusebox in your house goes haywired instead

I wish to be on The Simpsons

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but your name is in the credits in such a small font that noone could read it.

I wish I remebered if there was a The Simpsons episode where Bart was on TV and he tried to find his name from the credits.

[Dark-San]

Granted. You remembered that episode but then to do that the initial requirement was for you to forget your name, your life, your identity. It would be a high price to pay just for remembering a small clip of The Simpsons.

I wish Oil prices would be high.

[Fett One]

Granted, you get stoned to death by everyone for raising the price of gas

I wish for equal rights around the world

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted. Dictators claim that their people have right to vote against them, the torturing becomes unacceptable worldwide, even death penalties disappear. Nobody is discriminated because of their age, gender, skin color, sexuality or any other difference. However, there will be another rule everywhere: every single people in the world, including you, have to read one book: "The Most SPAMish And Unamusing Replies Mikachu Yukitatsu Posted At TPM"!

I wish for soap.

[Dark-San]

Granted. I bought you a soap and you were so happy that you mistaken it for a chicken wing and apparently ate it. Alas, there was no hope in the end as you are choked to death.

I wish the Whacked game's awards could increase.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, but you still don't get any of them.

I wish I had an XBOX 360

[Fett One]

Granted but you are forbiddedn from ever buying any games for it

I wish for a pet lizard

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, I'll send you a lizard egg I found near a nuclear power plant. You wait for it to hatch, and there it is, your own lizard. Unfortunately, it appears to grow in length 2 meters a day and it escapes from your house, going rampage. It attacks big cities such as New York, Tokyo and Beijing and forces countries to use nuclear weapons which leads to WW III.

I wish we wrote 'Tokyo' as 'Tookyoo' instead of 'Tokyo'.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted but then that causes world wide confusion causing the world to split into 2 halves, those who write it as Tokyo and those who say it as Tookyoo. This eventually turns into WW IIII.

I wish there were no more world wars

[Dark-San]

Granted. There would not be World War 3 but rather a struggle for power between the two superpower nations. It ends up into a nuclear showdown and it blasted the world into smittering bits.

I wish nuclear weapons would be ban.

[Fett One]

Granted but we are now defenseless against the aliens that plan on invading the earth next tuesday.

I wish we will never be invaded by aliens

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, we just get destroyed by another world war

I wish I could breath under water

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but you don't look good with gills.

I wish I could breath under water without gills.

[Dark-San]

Granted. Hey, wait a minute!

*Slaps self on the head*

You do not have to make that wish anymore since you could already do it. Remember! You have blood relations with Aquaman, which means you already have some ability to breath underwater.

I wish Crazy Elf Boy could have Spiderman's power.

[Fett One]

Granted but he gets attacked by Venom, Dr. Octopus, and the Green Goblin within minutes of gaining the powers

I wish to have telekenitic powers

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but you accidently move yourself into a wall after finding out you have no control over your new powers.

I wish I was good at accounting.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but eventually you become stressed because all the most difficult and long-winded tasks are given to you.

I wish computer programs worked always.

[Dark-San]

Granted. But then again even if it really works, you are still much in the dark on how the programming works since you have not studied C++ or Java before.

I wish Mikachu could kill a live chicken without hesitating.

[Fett One]

Granted but now that he can easily kill a chicken, he isn't afraid to go on to kill other creatures until one day he decides to start killing humans. Congratulation Dark-San, you just turned Mikachu into a murderer. :eng101:

I wish to become a competent superhero, that doesn't wear a cape

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but you'll get arrested for being naked in public.

I wish someone granted Fett One's wish with something that actually involves superheros.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, but it is a long boring speil that ends up in the destruction of this game

I wish for a wish were nothing can go wrong

[Fett One]

Granted, your wish is ignored so nothing happens

I wish for a million dollars, tax free, and the money is not stolen, it was acquired legally

[Dark-San]

Granted. I would mailed you a million dollar note in an instant. Oh wait, it should be 800 million dollars to be exact.

Here is your cash (http://www.pennylicious.com/images/2006-07/hell-money.jpg)!

*Hands over cash*

And in case, you are wondering what is it with that note. You can followed up on reading it here (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hell_money).

I wish I could finished up watching the pile of animes, which my friends had lend to me.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, just look at the pile itself for a second.

I wish Russia never attacked Finland again.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, but New Zealand decides to attack you instead

I wish I had more Doctor Who episodes to watch

[Dark-San]

Granted. But then, the broadcast station got blown off by terrorists, leaving you just watching the blank television screen.

I wish I had more leaves to play around with.

[Fett One]

Granted but they are poison ivy leaves so you endup getting very sick from playing in htem and ahve to stay indoors for an entire year

I wish to never age

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted you are now 17 for the rest of your life, never to be able to do anyone of the fun stuff

I wish our prime minister was better

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted. Thanks to your prime minister, Australia's economy improves considerably, unemployment is gone. He also does well outside the country, and has a sovereign solution to the problems in the Middle East. And he speaks to Pakistan and North Korea's leaders who completely forget theirt nuclear plans and even Russia, China and USA follow so there will be no nuclear weapons, never again. However, just then, aliens attack Earth and kidnap your beloved leader and that leads to a worldwide chaos because everyone's benefactor is gone.

I wish people realized that all the sites in the net aren't porn, I know one guy who thinks TPM is porn and noone moderates it. Perhaps he wasn't serious, though...

[Fett One]

Crazy Elf Boy, I'm 24 so why would I de-age?

Granted, there are no longer any websites for porn on the net. As a result you now have a mob hunting you down.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Uh yeh,

Granted.................................

I wish Fett One made a wish so I could grant it properly

[Fett One]

Sorry about that.

I wish for more popcorn

[Dark-San]

Granted. However you got choked on them while watching the Desperate Housewives episode. You were breathless for a while and could have been save if someone attended to you in a minute. But then, you are all alone at home. Too bad, I guess. ^.^

I wish the kidnapped Australian Prime Minister (the one mentioned by CEB) defeats the aliens and returns to Earth, a hero.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, he uses his diplomacy skills and the aliens change their attitude. They free him and everyone celebrates him as a hero. Aliens return to their home planet. Unfortunately, we realize the aliens that came here to kidnap the prime minister were just subordinates. Their prime minister is angry because they didn't obey his commands and convicts them to be sucked in a black hole.

I wish I was the first person to grant that wish of Dark-san's eventhough it took some time to type it.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, I am pretty sure you are the first

I wish that I understood Mikachu all the time rather then most

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted but you can ever understand the things that you probably didn't want to here from him.

I wish I had a Tribble (or a Kuriboh if you can't find me a Tribble and if you can't find me either, then get me a Furby.)

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, I stole Tribble from Captain Kirk, gave you a ragged Kuriboh card, and your new Furby does not work.

I wish I had edited my last post to make it more evident that I was talking about the alien prime minister in the last sentence.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, but everytime you write it, it gets deleted

I wish I had more paper clips

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted, but you accidently trips over a rock and the paper clips jab into your face especially your eyes which causes you to go blind.

I wish TPM was a video game.

[mr_pikachu]

Granted. Because video games cause violence (it's a widely believed fact!), every single person on TPM goes to the nearest school and starts shooting random people before killing themselves. Congratulations. You've just killed every single person on the forum.

I wish that exams had never been invented. (Essays all the way, baby!)

[Fett One]

Granted but now there is no way to see if people are learning so everyone ends up with A's on their report cards, including the stupid kids

I wish for x-ray vision

[Dark-San]

Granted. You died young because of it. X-ray are radiations and because this pair of eyes, you are constantly exposed to its harmful effect.

I wish someone could tell me my future.

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted, they tell you that you will be a millionaire, have a wonderful marriage, you will have great well behaved kids and will die at old age with no side effects

Of course the fortune teller is a known liar so you will get the opposite of what she predicted.

I wish somebody from TPM could make a television series about TPM.

[Fett One]

Granted but the show gets pulled from the air after being on for only 5 minutes.

I wish for a white christmas

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, your entired house is rained on by white anthrax

I wish anthrax didn't exist

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted, but there now exists a worse chemical substance that leaves you paralyzed for the rest of your life.

I wish I could have a chicken sandwich right now.

[Fett One]

Granted but it has mustard and horse raddish on it

I wish to have a great new year

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but not until next year.

I wish I was Yugi from Yu-Gi-Oh!

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted but it has mustard and horse raddish on it

I wish to have a great new year

I might not like spicy things but Horse raddish doesn't sound that bad and I like mustard on my sandwiches. I don't see how twisted that wish was, Fett One. But you probably tried hard to come up with a good twist anyways.

Okay, where was I?

Granted, but you are stalked by Rare Hunters who want your Millennium Item, have to sit through lengthy friendship speeches for Tea and not to mention you have a Yami who is in love with you (Well, from some Yu-Gi-Oh fanfiction I have read, Yami and Yugi are in love. In the anime, it isn't true but I am trying to make this wish really twisted.)

And then you get to sent to the shadow realm ... with Tea who keeps on spouting her friendships speeches and you can't leave so you will be driven insane.

I wish it was a opposite day.

[Dark-San]

Granted. You pooped at your pants instead of going to the loo. How embarrassing it is even if it is an opposite day.

I wished Duel Monsters TCG never exist in the first place.

[Fett One]

Inferno_Dragon, horse raddish and mustard are 2 things you normally wouldn't find on a chicken sandwhich, which is why I said those


Granted but an extremely annoying TCG comes into existance to replace it

I wish for a new Battle Toads video game

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted. The game is awesome and succesfull. However, it is going to be for Playstation 4 which costs 2,000$ when it's released.

I wish people could have memory expansion like computers and such.

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted, but it costs 2 trillion to buy and after you install it, your computer breaks down so now you have no computer and you are broke.

I wish the Whack-A-TMPer Version 3 would start up right ...... now.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, but it fails miserably due to lack of interest

I wish I had more games

[Dark-San]

Granted. All kinds of games starts raining from the sky. Happily, you leap out from your house and starts dancing around the street. Then one of the game hits you on the head and you ended up in hospital before you can pick up any. In the end when you got discharged, the all games had already been picked up, leaving you none.

I wish that the sky would really start raining games.

[Shadow Wolf]

Granted, but the game are so lame that no one is interested in playing them.

I wish I could get to know *insert a famous videogame designer's name here* in The Pokemasters Forums.

[Fett One]

Granted, you get a once in a life time meeting but you get hit in the head afterwards and forget meeting him/her. Plus the TPM server craches causing all of evidence of you meeting him/her to be deleting. You now have no memory and no proof of teh meeting

I wish all black&white movies get remade in color

[Dark-San]

Granted. Fett One footed the bill for the entire reproduction of all black and white films by loaning from a local bank. However in time to come, he was unable to foot all the bill and hence in the process, made bankrupt.

I wish that colours do not exist.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, but you find life really bland with no colours to brighten up your life

I wish I had more TPM

[Fett One]

Granted but suffer TPM overload which causes you to slip into a coma for the rest of your life

I wish for a new avatar

[Dark-San]

Granted!

Here, take it!

http://image.guardian.co.uk/sys-images/Film/Pix/pictures/2003/06/03/dumb128.jpg

*Stuffs picture into Fett One's profile*

I wish I would rule the world like an emperor and noone would dare oppose me.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, you are recognized as a leader by everyone and face no resistance. You have the whole world by your side and there's peace in your empire. But I won't let this sound like the prime minister grant...

"O mighty Emperor Dark-San, what's the secret of your success?" asks an interviewer.

"It's because of my MAGICAL NINTENDO DS! It gives me the power to rule this planet!" Dark-San answers as he draws the console from his pocket.

"Oh, that's the case? Let's see now...OOPS! I dropped it...it still works!! OOPS! I dropped it again! Hey, what's this piece here? Perhaps it broke...oh, I'm very sorrry..."

I wish I had the ONE RING TO RULE THEM ALL!!!

[Fett One]

Granted but everyone on the planet hunts you down and kills you in order to destroy the ring

I wish for a new name

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted, but it is a silly and ridicilious name plus it is too long to pronounce or write plus when shortened, it is even worse because it can easily be rhymed into jokes that would scar your mortal soul.

I wish one dollar would fall into my hands. (Don't ask, I just want to see how this one turns out.)

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but not after I cut your hands.

I wish I could grant Inferno_Dragon's wish without harm.

[Dark-San]

Granted. You turn out to be his fairy godmother. Wings, old vintage female clothes, magic wand and all, you looked extremely fantastic with those clothes on despite being a male!

I wish Mikachu could granted me all the wishes that I had made here in the entire topic.

[firepokemon]

Grand but it screwed you all up for life.

I wish I knew what the hell was happening online and at tpm lol.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but there's nothing to grant since you can view the old threads and such anyway.

I wish Finland made it to Football World Cup 2010.

[Dark-San]

Granted. But they got ownzed in the first round of the World Cup tournament by being thrown in the Group of Death. They lost all their three matches and had to return home in shame.

I wish Finland could really win the World Cup.

[Fett One]

Granted but the team loses the trophy the next day because it is discovered that everyone on the team took steroids

I wish people didn't commit suicide

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted, but thanks to your wish, earth's population has grown even larger since people can't commit suicide and earth's resources will run out in a couple years.

I wish I had the Sharingan.

[Dark-San]

Granted. I dug out your eyes while you were sleeping. You screamed in extreme pain, while being restrained by the ropes that were tied to you. Struggling is useless since the knots were dead- tied. While I was about to complete the entire implanting procedure, you died apparently due to blood loss.

I wish Inferno Dragon could survived that.

[Fett One]

Granted, he survives the operation but the implant causes him to die a few days later

I wish to be invunable

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted but if you wished to be Invunrable then you lucked out because you wished to be invunable

I wish people would spell things correctly

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted, but then this game wouldn't be much fun then.

I wish my Wii had a faster connection.

[Shadow Wolf]

Granted. Now you can download updates faster, meaning faster viruses, meaning your wii gets broken faster than the speed of light.

I wish I had a big belly button. (don't ask, just something my pal invented)

[Fett One]

Granted but it becoems so big that you are unable to move because it is keeping you in place due to it's tremendous weight

I wish for a week off from work

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted, but you don't get paid for and that is the week when you most need money.

I wish that it was Christmas Every Day (Lame I know, but no one has asked this wish and no one has twistfully granted it yet.)

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

http://www.pokemasters.net/forums/showthread.php?p=325442&highlight=ainainen#post325442

Granted, but it makes us realize my wish was lame, too.

I wish we had sweets for 4€ more often in our local shop instead of 6€.

[Dark-San]

Granted. The shop cuts the price to 4 Euros. It ended up making lesser profits and hence unable to sustain the fixed cost in the long term. In the end, the shop closes down. And you lost your only source of sweet around your place.

I wish there is not such a thing called inflation.

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted, but now balloons and blimps can't work so no one can go hot air ballooning, no one can enjoy balloons on the birthday and we won't get an good coverage at the Super Bowl because the annual blimp is gone.

I wish I had thought my wish a little more over. (Sorry Mikachu Yukitatsu, should have read back a little more before making that wish.)

[Fett One]

Granted but you end up making an even stupider wish

I wish animals couldn't become extinct

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted. Now there live dinosaurs in our age. Unfortunately, you are eaten by a velociraptor.

I wish Inferno_Dragon realized that I accept his apology and that wish was loooong ago.

[Dark-San]

Granted. But then it was all in a short while that he will punched you in the face. The impact of that punch causes you to bleed on the nose and had bruises all over. It is a repayment in the 'Whacked' game that you have created, Mikachu.

I wish Mikachu would realised that there is a flaw in the Whacked Game on the last award, The Elusive Award. For example, if I posted my first post of the 'Whacked' topic in post #121, where the game is supposed to end. No one else would be able to lay their hands on me, hence enabling me to win that award.

[firepokemon]

Granted, although I'm not really sure what I granted to.

And I wish to resurrect this game again.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted but it's a zombie now.

I wish all the TPMers were put in the same town and we could see what happens then.

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted, but we would all get annoyed with either after a few weeks and want to kill each other (I know that is not true but go with me on this.)

I wish that that they would find good endings to the Simpsons and Power Rangers. (Those shows need to end soon.)

[Fett One]

Granted but the endings are so bad that the creators of the shows are hanged

I wish star wars fans and star trek fans could learn to get along

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, but they both team up and kill all the pokemon fans

I wish I could have my office 2007 working

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, you are granted an own office where you work for 2007 years.

I wish someone rated this reply.

[Knight of Time]

Granted, your reply has been rated by the RRCOC (the Reply Rating Company of Canada), but it was rated only 1 out of 1 Google (1 followed by 100 zeros) stars, meaning, your reply literally was nothing short of terrible, my Finnish friend.

I wish I could predict and twist wishes of the future like a super genius.

[firepokemon]

Granted, you get your wish but this has grave and dangerous consequences. You feel powerful at first, but then your head slowly but surely grows bigger. The genius dna in your brain is causing the brain to swell. Eventually, your head grows biggers and bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger until your head is so huge, it explodes and you die. Be careful what you wish for :P

I wish Mao Asada of Japan wins ladies figure skating title.

[Fett One]

Granted but she loses the title after its discovered that she took performance enhancing drugs

I wish sports players didn't take steriods or any kind of enhancement drugs.

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted, but we find out all players are taking them and so all sports teams are terrible and no one will ever want to watch or see another sport again.

I wish I had my own private movie theater.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but they show only your own private movies there.

I wish I really could twist wishes instead of just interprepting them wrong.

[Fett One]

Granted but you twist them in such a way that it leads to your death

I wish comic books cost less

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, but since they cost less there not as good

I wish I had a better phone

[firepokemon]

Granted, you receive a phone that allows you to not only do the basics but also access the internet at super high speeds and the ability to have halographic 3d pictures however, there is a problem with all of that. You see the phone has a mind of its own. And slowly, but surely its hypnotizing you to do funny things. At first its pretty light and being smart to your mother, then it transcends to talking shit to girls but then finally, after the lightness is gone, it makes you climb the stairs of a 30 storey building and finally it tells you to jump. Your brain would usually say, "Well this is a stupid thing to do", but of course you are hypnotized. And then, finally, you jump.

I wish Miki Ando's injury gets better.

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted, but during the match, it starts hurting again and it becomes more painful than before.

I wish upon a star.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, but the it falls on you

I wish stars would stop falling on people

[Fett One]

Granted, now people fall onto stars

I wish hockey games had more fights

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but then they would begin killing each other, and there would eventually be no more hockey.

I wish that the MLB and NBA didn't have their Toronto teams so that they both would be 100% American.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but now Toronto can never be a part of America. Even if USA declears war and Conquers the whole Canada, Toronto will always resist.

I wish I had a copyright to EVERYTHING IN THE UNIVERSE gwaa haa haa

[firepokemon]

Granted, you have copyright to everything and thus you decide to license these copywrighted works. You get rich, very rich, so rich that eventually it eats you up and swallows. After years of meaningless greed, you get a heart attack and slowly slowly die.

I wish it would be warmer tomorrow.

[Fett One]

Granted. The temperature goes up to 160 degrees faranheit and kills anyone that doesn't ahve air conditioning

I wish everyone had air conditioning

[Knight of Time]

Granted. Everyone gets too much air conditioning, causing them to freeze themselves to death, possibly starting a new ice age.

I wish people would stop making wishes that when twisted, could result in major disaster, 'cause who knows what could happen someday?

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, but since they don't turn into major disasters people lose interest in this topic and TPM dies

I wish TPM would never die

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but this means TPMers doomed to post here forever. I didn't invent anything funnier this time.

I wish Hironobu Sakaguchi, Satoshi Tajiri, Shigeru Miyamoto and Hideo Kojima teamed up to create the greatest videogame ever.

[mr_pikachu]

Granted. But rather like Beethoven's mythical tenth symphony, it kills anyone who plays it. And guess who the beta tester is?

I wish I wasn't so tired.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, instead you are now eternally hungry

I wish I could get a good nights sleep

[Fett One]

Granted. You get one goods night sleep and after that you have nothing but restless nights for the rest of your life

I wish to have Dr. Octopus mechincal arms

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted. But you'll need to become a doctor first and study for 40 years.

I wish I could grant more Fett One's wishes.

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but if he was absent, you wouldn't be able to grant any of his wishes until he returned.

I wish that I knew how to fix any computer program through a hex editor.

[Fett One]

Granted but those are hte only kind of computer problems you know how to fix

I wish to own a 5 star hotel

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, but after an extensive review by inspectors it gets bumped down to a 1 star hotel

I wish I had unlimited internet usage

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but I granted it!

OK, OK, granted. First, you notice that you can go to forums and other sites 24 hours a day, and happily post, read, post, read and so on until you die. The only but is that when someone whacks you in the whacking game, some stupid gods think you are dead in Real Life, too and put the limitations back. And yes, I think there are some 'stupid' gods in mythologies...

I wish I was in Haapavesi. Check the Haapavesi-whack in the whacking game for more info.

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted, but you accidently enter a alternate version of Haapavesi when you step through a looking glass except this version is so perfect that it makes you sick and you can't return back because the mirror's imperfection (the mirror you just came out of) is so great that it has destroyed the portal now you are trapped in this world.

I wish that Yu-Gi-Oh/Duel Masters/Monster Rancher and Bakugan Battle Brawlers to see which show is the best that includes battling Monsters (Pokemon is exempt from this because nothing beats pokemon.)

[firepokemon]

^ Inferno next time please write your sentences properly but thank you for replying to this thread since I didn't have a clue what Mikachu was talking about.

I usually like making bigger replies but anyway. Congratulations you get your wish to see all four shows and see which one is best, unfortunately you suffer from major square eyes and forever now see things in squares.

I wish my tape didn't much up today so now I have to wait longer to watched the second episode of Meerkat Manor season 3.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Granted, but instead of running out of tape, the TV blows up.

I wish TV's wouldn't suddenly explode

[Inferno_Dragon]

Granted, they don't explode, you explode.

I wish people didn't explode.

[Fett One]

Granted, they implode instead

I wish cars didn't run on gas