PancaKe
18th October 2008, 08:56 PM
Yes. Can you believe it? I have written something! I know, I'm so proud. *wipes tear*
Well, this is one piece out of a two part story that is being handed in as my major assessment for Writing Fiction. We had to develop a story with two perspectives, and this is one of them I guess! Any feedback is totally totally necessary! =]
Um... yeah. So thats it for now. :D
__________________________________________________ _____________________
Hunted - Part 1: Blaire
Here we were, camping again. I loved to be on the hunt, I loved to track down the enemy. It gave me a thrill every time we found one of the enemy and destroyed it. Thousands of innocent lives, saved. These people didn’t even realize the danger they were in. Living in ignorant bliss, no knowledge of the pain and terror caused by the enemy’s superior powers and by their desire and thirst for blood and anguish.
The blood and anguish that tore families apart, that left survivors scarred so deeply they felt as though they would never heal and never recover. Images that were burnt into the minds of witnesses, like trademarks of farmers branded onto unsuspecting cattle. They would never fade; never heal as time goes on. Always a reminder.
I didn’t like to think about these things. I often buried them with happier thoughts. Yvonne and Hunter were happier thoughts. Our trio, although we had only been together a few months, made me smile and laugh almost every day. Right now, Yvonne was clearly trying to push her powers to the limit once more.
“Damned fire!” This was followed by a string of explicit words I was amused to hear come out of her usual ladylike mouth. She glared at the fire, cradling her hand against her chest. I tried to conceal my laughter. Yvonne was so determined to stretch her powers, so unsatisfied with being able to breathe underwater, that she just had to stick her hand into the fire.
She probably felt useless. Sometimes it frustrated me that all she could do was breathe underwater. Handy if we were hunting amongst islands, but in the middle of the country, with no sea for kilometres, it seemed pointless. She was good company and she took care of Hunter and I like my own mother would have.
“You really should stick to water,” Hunter called from somewhere in the darkness surrounding us. He was surveying the forest with eyes that weren’t phased by the absence of light, collecting firewood. Hunter found any opportunity to have a go at Yvonne. I think he found it exciting to see her mad. It amused me, but I never joined in.
“Blaire, come and help me with these logs!” Hunter yelled out to me. I saw a few logs thrown out of the darkness, and went to carry them. He appeared beside me, carrying a few of his own. “Have you heard anything yet?” he inquired.
I shook my head. “Not yet, but I’m keeping an ear out,” I replied. My supersonic hearing had been scanning the surrounding cities. It was the middle of the night, the only things to be heard were howling cats, crying babies, and young lovers.
Approaching the fire once more, I saw that Yvonne had made us some supper. I gave her a kiss on the forehead along with a thank you.
“Yvonne, you know I can’t eat crackers,” Hunter sounded disappointed. “You know I’m allergic to the yeast.”
“Oh my goodness, I am so sorry!” Yvonne frantically started to apologize, before acknowledging the large grin on Hunter’s face. Her worried expression turned to a mix of wanting to be mad and wanting to laugh.
“That’s slack man,” I defended her. “She just stuck her hand in the fire, give her a break.” Hunter looked genuinely sorry for a moment, before bursting into laughter.
* * *
It was during my watch that the explosion happened. The forest was one moment calm, the only sounds being the crackling of a dying fire. The next, Yvonne and Hunter were sitting right up, and my sensitive ears were burning with the pain of such a loud noise.
Clutching my ears to somehow numb the intense fire inside, Hunter and I leapt up and for our trail bikes. Yvonne attempted to gather our sleeping bags and clean the campsite, but Hunter and I shook our heads. We stuffed our belongings into large backpacks, and started the bikes, speeding in the direction of the nearest city.
I followed the dim taillight of Hunter’s bike. Hunter led the way, his night vision guiding him around invisible trees and obstacles.
I wish the explosion had deafened me. I heard the wails as if it were Yvonne and Hunter wailing beside me. The shrieks of horror from families, the cries of pain from those hurt. I wanted to curl up into the foetal position and rock backwards and forwards. My insides felt as though they were in a thousand knots. I wanted to throw up and die. Their pain was so intense.
Sirens wailed. Cries of help, shouts of panic and anguish were mixed and became one distraught city. Speckled lights on the horizon drew closer as we rode towards and into the city. Around us, buildings lay shattered, bodies lay bleeding and dying on the streets, amongst the rubble and debris, and people ran one way and another, confused and scared.
I focused intently on the road in front of me.
* * *
When I heard the voice, it sung to me a piercing melody, one that broke through all the clutter and noise my ears were picking up. The voice was small and trembling, as though it belonged to a scared little child. It was whispering and sobbing at the same time. “I don’t know where we can go.” Then, there was silence. Total silence.
Unnatural silence
Hunter’s sharp eyes scanned our surroundings, my ears perked for any sounds. Yvonne stood as still as she could, her knees shaking slightly. I sometimes forgot it was only her first hunt, and felt a little sorry for her.
A snap.
Possibly a tree branch or a leaf crunching under foot was heard a few kilometres to the left. Then a rustling of leaves, growing closer. My heart quickened its pounding. I was sure that everybody could hear the constant thudding.
“It’s coming our way,” I managed to whisper
The thought of a battle excited Hunter. Yvonne’s eyes filled with fear of the unknown. I was worried about survival.
The rustling stopped all of a sudden. We pulled out our guns. Standing back to back, we used our senses to survey the area. Hunter’s night vision scanned the trees constantly. I listened intently. It wasn’t right for it to be so quiet.
Footsteps.
Something scrambling through low shrubbery and the debris on the forest floor. Deep gasps, in and out, seeking much needed air. They grew closer and closer. I aimed my weapon into the darkness of the trees.
“Don’t shoot that way.” The same small voice, this time calm, floated through the air and weaved its way to us in the same intricate melody it had previously. “He’s not the one you want.”
I turned my head. She looked like a small child, but she was much older than that. She stood before us. Long, flowing dark hair trailed down her back and swayed as though moved by a gentle breeze. The forest was still around her. Her aura lit her surroundings dimly. She stood and stared at us with large empty golden eyes, as though she was waiting for us to kill her.
“No!” A cry of pure anguish and horror echoed the empty forest. A lanky boy, scruffy black hair covering his face, emerged from the darkness surrounding us, bleeding and bruised. Uncontrollable sobs flowed as he collapsed to the ground.
She was the enemy.
She smiled at him, and closed her eyes.
A strong breeze whipped up from nowhere.
Forces blew so strong it was hard to stay standing. Yvonne stumbled back, caught by Hunters quick reflexes.
She opened her eyes, and stared into my own.
Then, there was nothing.
Well, this is one piece out of a two part story that is being handed in as my major assessment for Writing Fiction. We had to develop a story with two perspectives, and this is one of them I guess! Any feedback is totally totally necessary! =]
Um... yeah. So thats it for now. :D
__________________________________________________ _____________________
Hunted - Part 1: Blaire
Here we were, camping again. I loved to be on the hunt, I loved to track down the enemy. It gave me a thrill every time we found one of the enemy and destroyed it. Thousands of innocent lives, saved. These people didn’t even realize the danger they were in. Living in ignorant bliss, no knowledge of the pain and terror caused by the enemy’s superior powers and by their desire and thirst for blood and anguish.
The blood and anguish that tore families apart, that left survivors scarred so deeply they felt as though they would never heal and never recover. Images that were burnt into the minds of witnesses, like trademarks of farmers branded onto unsuspecting cattle. They would never fade; never heal as time goes on. Always a reminder.
I didn’t like to think about these things. I often buried them with happier thoughts. Yvonne and Hunter were happier thoughts. Our trio, although we had only been together a few months, made me smile and laugh almost every day. Right now, Yvonne was clearly trying to push her powers to the limit once more.
“Damned fire!” This was followed by a string of explicit words I was amused to hear come out of her usual ladylike mouth. She glared at the fire, cradling her hand against her chest. I tried to conceal my laughter. Yvonne was so determined to stretch her powers, so unsatisfied with being able to breathe underwater, that she just had to stick her hand into the fire.
She probably felt useless. Sometimes it frustrated me that all she could do was breathe underwater. Handy if we were hunting amongst islands, but in the middle of the country, with no sea for kilometres, it seemed pointless. She was good company and she took care of Hunter and I like my own mother would have.
“You really should stick to water,” Hunter called from somewhere in the darkness surrounding us. He was surveying the forest with eyes that weren’t phased by the absence of light, collecting firewood. Hunter found any opportunity to have a go at Yvonne. I think he found it exciting to see her mad. It amused me, but I never joined in.
“Blaire, come and help me with these logs!” Hunter yelled out to me. I saw a few logs thrown out of the darkness, and went to carry them. He appeared beside me, carrying a few of his own. “Have you heard anything yet?” he inquired.
I shook my head. “Not yet, but I’m keeping an ear out,” I replied. My supersonic hearing had been scanning the surrounding cities. It was the middle of the night, the only things to be heard were howling cats, crying babies, and young lovers.
Approaching the fire once more, I saw that Yvonne had made us some supper. I gave her a kiss on the forehead along with a thank you.
“Yvonne, you know I can’t eat crackers,” Hunter sounded disappointed. “You know I’m allergic to the yeast.”
“Oh my goodness, I am so sorry!” Yvonne frantically started to apologize, before acknowledging the large grin on Hunter’s face. Her worried expression turned to a mix of wanting to be mad and wanting to laugh.
“That’s slack man,” I defended her. “She just stuck her hand in the fire, give her a break.” Hunter looked genuinely sorry for a moment, before bursting into laughter.
* * *
It was during my watch that the explosion happened. The forest was one moment calm, the only sounds being the crackling of a dying fire. The next, Yvonne and Hunter were sitting right up, and my sensitive ears were burning with the pain of such a loud noise.
Clutching my ears to somehow numb the intense fire inside, Hunter and I leapt up and for our trail bikes. Yvonne attempted to gather our sleeping bags and clean the campsite, but Hunter and I shook our heads. We stuffed our belongings into large backpacks, and started the bikes, speeding in the direction of the nearest city.
I followed the dim taillight of Hunter’s bike. Hunter led the way, his night vision guiding him around invisible trees and obstacles.
I wish the explosion had deafened me. I heard the wails as if it were Yvonne and Hunter wailing beside me. The shrieks of horror from families, the cries of pain from those hurt. I wanted to curl up into the foetal position and rock backwards and forwards. My insides felt as though they were in a thousand knots. I wanted to throw up and die. Their pain was so intense.
Sirens wailed. Cries of help, shouts of panic and anguish were mixed and became one distraught city. Speckled lights on the horizon drew closer as we rode towards and into the city. Around us, buildings lay shattered, bodies lay bleeding and dying on the streets, amongst the rubble and debris, and people ran one way and another, confused and scared.
I focused intently on the road in front of me.
* * *
When I heard the voice, it sung to me a piercing melody, one that broke through all the clutter and noise my ears were picking up. The voice was small and trembling, as though it belonged to a scared little child. It was whispering and sobbing at the same time. “I don’t know where we can go.” Then, there was silence. Total silence.
Unnatural silence
Hunter’s sharp eyes scanned our surroundings, my ears perked for any sounds. Yvonne stood as still as she could, her knees shaking slightly. I sometimes forgot it was only her first hunt, and felt a little sorry for her.
A snap.
Possibly a tree branch or a leaf crunching under foot was heard a few kilometres to the left. Then a rustling of leaves, growing closer. My heart quickened its pounding. I was sure that everybody could hear the constant thudding.
“It’s coming our way,” I managed to whisper
The thought of a battle excited Hunter. Yvonne’s eyes filled with fear of the unknown. I was worried about survival.
The rustling stopped all of a sudden. We pulled out our guns. Standing back to back, we used our senses to survey the area. Hunter’s night vision scanned the trees constantly. I listened intently. It wasn’t right for it to be so quiet.
Footsteps.
Something scrambling through low shrubbery and the debris on the forest floor. Deep gasps, in and out, seeking much needed air. They grew closer and closer. I aimed my weapon into the darkness of the trees.
“Don’t shoot that way.” The same small voice, this time calm, floated through the air and weaved its way to us in the same intricate melody it had previously. “He’s not the one you want.”
I turned my head. She looked like a small child, but she was much older than that. She stood before us. Long, flowing dark hair trailed down her back and swayed as though moved by a gentle breeze. The forest was still around her. Her aura lit her surroundings dimly. She stood and stared at us with large empty golden eyes, as though she was waiting for us to kill her.
“No!” A cry of pure anguish and horror echoed the empty forest. A lanky boy, scruffy black hair covering his face, emerged from the darkness surrounding us, bleeding and bruised. Uncontrollable sobs flowed as he collapsed to the ground.
She was the enemy.
She smiled at him, and closed her eyes.
A strong breeze whipped up from nowhere.
Forces blew so strong it was hard to stay standing. Yvonne stumbled back, caught by Hunters quick reflexes.
She opened her eyes, and stared into my own.
Then, there was nothing.