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Phoenixsong
25th June 2007, 05:37 PM
Crazy like a Fox:

An Interactive Pokémon Fanfiction by Kyra King, otherwise known as Phoenixsong Firebird

(This fanfic is rated PG-13 for occasional violent or disturbing scenes, cursing, use of alcohol and possibly drugs, and the occasional sexual innuendo. While they are normally not severe and will not appear in every story, the fact remains that they are present and young readers or those who are averse to such things might want to stay away.)


This story is dedicated to the memory of my uncle, Dwayne King (1956-2007). Just as Reinhardt Sterling always makes certain that justice is served in his world, may justice be served for you as well. I love you and I’ll miss you, Uncle Dwayne.


Well, howdy there, folks! I’m Phoenixsong, in case you weren’t intelligent enough to infer that from the little poster-info-sidebar conveniently located to your left. Then again, if you’re not smart enough to know that, perhaps you shouldn’t be reading this fanfic.

Not that I’m trying to insult anyone’s intelligence, mind you (though I’m sure we’ll all still have a good chuckle at those who were dumb enough not to know that, ahaha). It’s just that Crazy like a Fox isn’t your average fanfic. Quite the contrary, in fact. By clicking on this topic, you have decided to team up with oddball Saffron City private investigator Reinhardt Sterling as he does what he does best: solve mysteries. That’s right, people—YOU’RE going to be solving puzzles and mysteries as you go. And that, of course, will require some intelligence and logical thinking on your part. Confused? Allow me to elaborate…

This is how Crazy like a Fox is going to work. First of all, this work of fiction is not one long story (although it does follow a continuous thread, to be sure) but many short stories. Each short story is further split into two parts. The first part is the Mystery. In this first part, you’ll read a story about our hero Sterling and some sort of mysterious mystery, puzzling puzzle or other confounding conundrum that he has to solve if he wants to get paid. Peculiar as Sterling is, however (as you’ll find out once I’ve introduced you to him), he’s a genius, and he can usually figure out the answer by the end of the Mystery part. The question is… can you?

If you read through each Mystery very carefully, you’ll find that all of the clues you need to solve it are right there in front of you; you just have to know what you might be looking for and how to distinguish it from a red herring. The trick to solving the mystery can be one of a number of things, or sometimes a combination of those things. For example, while in one Mystery you might need to use process of elimination to find a culprit, in another you might have to rely on your common sense to determine what about a suspect’s story just doesn’t fit.

And, of course, since this is a Pokémon story being shared with a Pokémon board, it just wouldn’t be complete if some of those Mysteries didn’t have to do with a little Pokémon problem solving. You might have to draw on all of your Pokémon knowledge to figure out the answer, and it could be knowledge about almost any facet of the game. (Yes, I said the game. The world of Crazy like a Fox has absolutely nothing to do with the world of the anime [which I hate anyway], and as such no Mystery will involve knowledge of said annoying televised drivel. Also, as far as I can see right now, the only aspect of the games that will not apply to this fic is anything concerning humans. Humans do not exist in the world of this story.) You might have to think about type-trumping, the effects of held items or where a certain Pokémon can be found in the wild… almost anything is fair game as long as crafty little moi can find a way to translate it into this story. You’d best keep your wits about you and be open to any possibility if you want half a chance of solving the case. Also note that I make no promises or statements about the difficulty of solving any given Mystery. If you feel that the most recent ones have been either too hard or too easy, however, you can let me know and I’ll see what I can do for you. Not that I’m going to baby anyone, mind you.

After you’ve read the Mystery, you can take your time trying to work out the answer. If you’d like to take a guess at it, please PM it to me; don’t discuss it here, as you might spoil it for someone else or at least influence their answer. I’m not going to tell you whether or not you’re right, however; you’ll just have to wait. After three days have passed since the current Mystery ended, I will no longer accept submissions for the answer. Instead, I’ll post the second part of the story: the Solution. Sterling or another character will walk you through solving the Mystery, and as such you’ll be able to see how well you did. Then I’ll post the next Mystery and we can do it all over again! Sounds like fun, right? (Oh, and don’t worry about delays between the posting of the Mystery and the Solution. I write them both at once, as though they were one continuous story, and then post them one part at a time. I cannot, however, promise regular updates to the Mysteries. I’ll do my best to post them according to some sort of schedule, but don’t get your hopes up. Feel free to wing a stick at me if it’s been too long [say, three weeks to a month or more] and tell me to get my rear in gear and write another one.)

That’s all you need to know about how this fic will work; at least, it is until I come up with some other wicked and devious way to torment you. The last thing I want to say is that, quite frankly, I haven’t actually written any lengthy projects or fics in years. I like to pretend that I’m a “decent” author, but I’m so rusty that I don’t even know if I’m up to *that* standard any longer. Furthermore, I also rushed this first one just a little bit because I was determined to post this before the GPs. Not that I’m expecting a nomination or anything; that’s just the deadline I set for myself because I figured I needed one in order to get back into the swing of writing. As such, bear with me if my writing sucks at first. Just let me know (politely, of course) what I need to improve on, and hopefully each Mystery will get better and better as we go on.

So, uh, my apologies for the long author’s notes (I generally try to keep them short and sweet, if I use them at all, but sometimes that’s just impossible), but there you go. Are you all ready? Then grab your magnifying glass, set your brain on uber-logic-mode, pull on a trenchcoat and a Dick Tracy fedora and get to work solving crime!

~Crazy like a Phoenix

*~*~*

The Introductory Mystery: The Thief that Struck like Lightning

The polite adjective to use when describing Reinhardt Sterling was eccentric. The adjective used more commonly by the citizens of Saffron City was crazy.

Then again, what else would one call a man like Sterling? At first glance, he looked like a normal Ninetales: tallish, same luxurious, cream-colored fur with tan points here and there, same red eyes and reddish hair. He dressed impeccably; most people expected that from such an elegant-looking Pokémon, though. Sterling never bought designer clothing, as he considered it a spectacular waste of his hard-earned money, but the clothes he did purchase invariably looked just as impressive and dashing when he wore them despite their less-than-impressive and probably-not-that-dashing prices.

He talked funny, though. Sterling’s mode of speech was often very wordy, roundabout and somewhat antiquated; “I suppose I do have a tendency to be verbose and loquacious when I speak,” as he put it. It was not altogether too rare for Sterling’s various employers to have to break out the dictionary from time to time when he spoke to them.

Sterling could be pretty creepy, too. His manners were as gentlemanly as they come, of course, but he had a habit of popping up in places no one would quite expect him to be. The people of Saffron often felt like the fox was everywhere at once and could suddenly appear at any given moment; it made them all feel rather paranoid. Some said all Ninetales could do that, or something like it, at least. Most, though, said it was just another disturbing Sterling thing. Some even said it was some sort of psycho black magic he practiced… which the others dismissed as ridiculous before telling the ones who had made the suggestion to get out of the twelfth century. At least, they hoped it was ridiculous. One never knew with Reinhardt Sterling.

A similar debate cropped up over his smile. Sterling wore a slight but constant smile at all but the gravest times; it seemed at once friendly, haughty, knowing and slightly sinister. “All foxes smile like that,” people would reassure themselves. “They’re all sly and crafty, and they’ve all got that high-and-mighty smug look on their faces. It’s normal.” “Normal” as it was, however, Sterling’s ever-present smirk unnerved them. It gave them the impression that he was plotting something whenever his ruby eyes met their own, like he was going to… eat them, or something.

What really got people, though, was the hats. While everything else about the Ninetales gave him the intriguing air of a suave, debonair and moderately mad supervillain, the hats were what convinced them that Sterling was just plain crazy.

He had literally hundreds of the things in his house. Most people didn’t want to go inside there, mind you, but they’d all heard from someplace or another that he had whole closets, even a library room of sorts, filled with nothing but hats. And each hat was different. It didn’t matter how old the hat was, where it was from, what it looked like or even whether the hat was intended for use by a male or a female; if it went on your head, it went into Sterling’s prized chapeau collection. From fedoras to fezes to headdresses to mobcaps, the myriad hats were like Sterling’s children and he would do just about anything for them or to get his hands on another specimen.

He even wore those hats out in public, too, and every single day it was a different one. Monday morning Sterling might step out of his front door sporting a snazzy red beret; on Tuesday people would see him in a rainbow-colored propeller beanie; come Sunday he would have been spotted in a baseball cap, a top hat, a sombrero, a turban and a bicycle helmet, and of course he hadn’t even put a dent in exhausting his collection. Most of the time the hats did not match or even clashed violently with whatever otherwise perfect outfit Sterling wore, and he attracted rather more than his fair share of stares and snickers. It didn’t bother him, however; no matter what anyone did or said, he would go about his business with an intimidating smile on his face and a ridiculous hat on his head.

Yes, there was absolutely no doubt in the collective mind of Saffron City that Reinhardt Sterling was crazy. And yet, while he would have been something of a pariah in most other cities, or even asked (or forced) to leave town, the citizens of Saffron were glad to have their resident lunatic around. Crazy as Sterling was, they all knew there was a method in his madness. There had to be.

How else could he possibly be the best private investigator Kanto had ever seen?

*~*~*

“It’s… it’s… the… the… the maid, right?” John banged a heavy fist on Sterling’s desk and sat back with a satisfied smile on his short, thick muzzle. “The maid was lying because she said she didn’t know anything about the book, but she had been talking about it to the butler! Right, Reinhardt? Did I get it this time?”

Sterling looked across his desk at his friend, smiling as always but shaking his head. John Barrett the Ursaring was his assistant in his small, private investigation operation. John was nothing short of a six-foot three-inch and unnervingly muscular Teddy Ursa. He was generally pretty quiet, a bit slow on the uptake but very understanding, and without a doubt the best friend a man could ever wish for. According to several small children John had comforted for various reasons, he was also as soft and huggable as a Teddy Ursa. He was also one of very few people that actually called Sterling by his first name instead of his last. As much as Sterling enjoyed John’s friendship and company, however, that did not hide the fact that he was utterly useless as a partner in the business because he had the all the deductive reasoning of the cowboy hat-shaped paperweight on Sterling’s desk. As such, John used his degree in business to handle the money and other administrative tasks that Sterling considered rather beneath him.

“Not quite, John, not quite,” said the Ninetales, who at the moment wore a tall, black stovepipe hat atop his slick red hair. “You are right about the maidservant being suspicious, to be certain, but just because she knew where the book was located doesn’t mean that she took the money in it. The butler, if you recall, not only knew where the book was, but also cited the pages between which the money could be found. He said he saw it sandwiched between pages 121 and 122.”

“So?”

“So, John, the butler’s statement is false. A book is always numbered beginning with page two on the left, yes? Therefore, it is physically impossible, given the common design of books, for something to be between pages 121 and 122. They’re two sides of the same page.”

John pouted. “Aww, darnit. I thought I really had this one…”

“Not to worry, John.” Sterling reached underneath his desk and retrieved a bottle of his favorite Red Rayquaza wine. He uncorked the bottle with a claw and poured himself a glass, watching lazily as the dark pink liquid rolled around its sides. “Your error, my friend, lies in the fact that in every case I have presented you, you are either over-analyzing or under-analyzing the situation when in fact all you need to do is make good use of your common sense. I’m sure you’ll get the hang of it; as with anything else, it does take practice.”

Business had been slow the past few weeks. Sterling almost found it annoying that no one in Saffron had been robbed, killed or through a divorce or separation for such a length of time. It meant, of course, that Saffron was experiencing a time, however brief, of peace and amity. Peace and amity were good things, to be sure. They were also things that meant Sterling was out of work for who knew how long. As there was nothing else to do, Sterling and John had been in his house all day—the frugal Sterling, not wanting to pay for both a decent-sized ranch house and the rent on an office space, worked out of his home—going over some of the annoying but necessary paperwork and then, when that was as done as it ever gets, talking about everything and nothing in particular. Eventually, John, ever ready to improve his investigative skills, had managed to persuade his Ninetales friend to give him mysteries to solve. And so it was that the pair had spent the last two hours discussing mysteries, Sterling either making them up off the top of his head or relating cases he had solved before John had started working with him. Each one ended in the same way—with John entirely unable to figure out the answer, and Sterling having to feed it to him or tell him outright. The fox was beginning to tire of their little game, but John piped up:

“Give me another one, Reinhardt.”

Looking over the top of his wineglass, Sterling arched an eyebrow. “Are you sure? Perhaps we should give it a rest for today, John. No offense intended, my friend, but I do grow bored.”

“Aww, c’mon, Reinhardt. One more. Just one more. And I swear to Groudon I’ll get it right this time.” John gave Sterling a pleading look that reminded him of a very disappointed two year-old.

“Hmm… I suppose if you’d really like another one… Very well, then, but this is absolutely the last one… let’s see if I can find a simple one for you, shall I?” Sterling closed his eyes for a moment, scouring his memory for a suitable occurrence. “A good story, a great story, perhaps I should just settle for a better-than-average story… ah, yes, John, here we go. Shall I tell you about the Emerson case?”

The Ursaring nodded enthusiastically. “Fire away, Reinhardt! And I’m going to figure this one out, too, you wait and see…”

Sterling laughed as he removed his stovepipe hat and began toying with it. “I’ll begin firing away as you wish, then, my friend. All right now…

“Are you familiar with that fancy estate out on Route 8, John? The one that was turned into a fine arts center a few months aback? Well, up until seven years ago the place was owned by one of those old-money families, the Emersons; the residents at the time were the kind of stereotypical stuck-up rich couple one might expect in such a fancy house, Nathaniel Emerson, a Raichu, his Infernape wife, Iphigenia, and their Monferno son, Ignatius. It so happened that Iphigenia had a younger sister by the name of Corinna. The two of them had never really gotten along as children, apparently, and the hostility had escalated further after Iphigenia married into money and Corinna married into… ah, shall we say, not so much money.”

Here Sterling paused to finish the last of his Red Rayquaza, letting it roll around his mouth a while before swallowing it and wiping his lips daintily. He refilled his glass and gestured at John with the bottle. “Would you care for some, John?”

“No, no, none for me, thanks, Reinhardt.” John shook his head deliberately. “I want to keep my mind completely clear and focused, you know. ‘Cause, you know, I’m going to figure this out this time. Really.”

Another laugh. “Of course you are, my dear John, of course you are. At any rate…

“What Iphigenia told the police later on was that she’d had enough of the constant animosity between her sister and herself, so she decided to give burying the hatchet a chance and invited Corinna and her family over for the weekend. So, Corinna, her husband Morris—strapping big Empoleon fellow, on store room duty at a general store in Pallet, if memory serves—and their son Terry arrive that Thursday, ready to make some sort of attempt at an enjoyable family weekend. Supposedly, they manage to get on well enough throughout the entire visit, and on Monday morning Corinna, Morris and Terry pack up the car and head back out to Pallet.

“Now, the Emersons were in possession of a large collection of valuable antiques, heirlooms and other such fancy baubles that owe their hefty price tags to whose house they’ve been in the longest in addition to what they’re actually made of. One such item was a small, golden ring with emerald inlays that had belonged to Nathaniel’s great-great grandfather; the ring, along with other trinkets of a lesser status, sat in a display case in the drawing room. About an hour after Corinna’s family left, Iphigenia went into the drawing room to look for something. That was when she noticed the broken glass. Someone had smashed through the display case and apparently appropriated the valuable little ring within.

“Being extremely possessive of their little trinkets the Emersons had gone to great lengths to protect their treasures, installing elaborate security cameras in most areas and rooms of their estate among other things. While their boy alerted the authorities, Iphigenia and Nathaniel checked the last night’s tapes.”

“What’d they see?” asked John, forgetting that he had not wanted any of the proffered wine and pouring himself a glass.

“The tapes showed a young Monferno enter the room shortly after midnight, break through the glass with a well-aimed Thunderpunch, pocket the ring and scamper off with it. When the Emersons showed the tape to the police, they claimed it was Corinna’s son Terry who had stolen the ring, pointing out that the robber was wearing Terry’s clothing at the time. They then produced a few pictures they had of their nephew in said outfit as proof that the clothes did belong to him. The police sent out an all-points bulletin for Corinna’s car so as to find the family and question them about the incident. Until they could be found, there wasn’t much else the police could do.” Sterling stood and walked over to one of his hat closets, replacing his stovepipe and picking up a ridiculous-looking pirate’s hat, complete with an oversized, garishly pink feather. “I haven’t worn this in ages, you know…” he mumbled to himself.

John was wracking his brains, trying his hardest to figure out what was wrong with the Emerson’s story; the expression on his face made it look as though it were a painful process. “Couldn’t it…” he began, scratching his head with a claw, “couldn’t it have been the Emersons’ boy, though? Couldn’t he have taken his cousin’s clothes and done it? I’m not sure why he’d want to steal it, seeing as it’d eventually be his anyway, but…”

“Ah, yes, John, very good!” Sterling swept the pirate hat off of his head and made an elegant, flourishing bow before sitting down behind his desk again. “That possibility did not escape the police, nor did it escape me. In fact, the detectives told me there was some information that suggested the Emersons might have prompted their son to pose as Terry and steal the ring. As you can probably imagine, everything the Emersons owned that was worth anything at all was insured up to the very gills. Should something happen to the ring, the Emersons would receive a tidy sum for it… well over one hundred thousand dollars, if memory serves. As such, they did indeed have a motive for taking it that seemed just as valid as the greed and jealousy motive Iphigenia had claimed for her sister.”

“Well, then, all the police would have to do is dust for fingerprints, right? If they’re Ignatius’s prints, it was him, and if they’re not it was either Terry or someone else!”

Sterling shook his head; the massive feather in his hat flopped crazily. “There were no prints to be found, my friend. Nothing at all, in fact, save some broken glass and the absence of a certain rare ring. As I said, until Corinna’s family could be questioned and a more thorough investigation and search could be done, the whole situation was, in fact, a sort of case of ‘he said, she said’—although, of course, Corinna and her family had not yet been questioned so as to have ‘said’ anything, but I believe you get the picture.”

“But… but…” John was fighting to find a loophole somewhere. “But…”

“But,” said the Ninetales, now examining each individual fiber of the ugly pink feather one by one, “I was confident that young Terry was innocent and that either his cousin or his aunt and uncle had set him up.” Sterling looked up at the straining, muttering John. “Well, there you have it, my ursine companion. Tell me why I was so convinced of Terry’s innocence. Explain to me what I had to explain to the detectives.”

Several minutes of silence ensued. John took another gulp of his drink, stood and began pacing across the room, determined to figure this one out without his friend’s help. Sterling remained fascinated by the feather and continued giving each strand a thorough inspection.

John finally gave up. “Gah,” he snorted, “I just can’t see it, Reinhardt. You haven’t given me enough information!”

Sterling looked up at his friend, still smiling that ever-present Sterling smile. “I have given you just as much information as I was given when I arrived at the scene, John. Very well, then. Terry could not possibly have been the one who stole the ring, and this is why.”

What did Sterling notice that proves Terry’s innocence?

mistysakura
26th June 2007, 04:51 AM
Hehe, I like this fic! I used to do mysteries like this all the time... ahh the memories... I was never any good at them though. And if they involve game mechanics, I don't know a lot about that either (although Google is my friend). Anyway, I really like how you described Sterling; a truly eccentric character. The way you have Sterling and John reminds me a lot of Sherlock Holmes and Watson, right down to the condescension. Isn't it Teddiursa though? The hats you'll have to come up with every chapter are going to amuse me.

That's all from me for now. Cool stuff.

Phoenixsong
26th June 2007, 11:32 AM
Hey, look, a review! Thanks!

Yeah, describing Sterling is fun... originally, his personality was completely different and closer to the stereotypical Sam Spade type of deal. But then I realized, "Hey! A suave, insane hat collector is WAY better than Sam Spade!" And I did kinda play off of the Sherlock/Watson deal, yeah... oh, and the Teddiursa bit. Yeah, I know it's spelled that way; my intent was to substitute "Teddy Ursa" for "teddy bear", as in "John Barrett is like a big teddy bear". If I mention an actual character, though, it will be spelled "Teddiursa".

Yay for coming up with bizarre hats! XD

I'd like to take this time to point out a slight change in the schedule. Tomorrow (Wednesday) I fly up to New York for the funeral of the uncle I dedicated this to. And since Wednesday/Thursday would be the day I intended to update with the answer... chances are that won't happen. So, just for this time, you have until I return--which should be around Sunday evening--to submit guesses. In the meantime, feel free to keep commenting here, and I'll see it when I get back if not sooner (internet access might be kinda iffy up there...). Don't worry, the answer HAS already been written, I just won't be able to post it in time this week.

So, uh, yeah, happy mystery solving and many crazy hats to you...?

Mew Trainer Rose
27th June 2007, 01:58 AM
Ah, cool idea! And it's good to see you writing again.

Mysteries aren't my favorite genre, but I shall enjoy reading these. We shall see if I can figure these out. :) My answer to this once shall be sent shortly.

Phoenixsong
2nd July 2007, 09:37 AM
Yes, it's a day later than I said it would be. Blame the suckiness that is LaGuardia Airport, AirTran, rainy summers and long train rides. I was supposed to be home by about 8:00 pm; I got home after one o'clock. Needless to say, I was not amused. But I am here now to shed some light on this mystery, eh? So, enjoy the conclusion of this introduction thingie, and hopefully the beginning of the next should be up soon!

*~*~*

The Introductory Solution

“Here we go, then , my friend,” Sterling began, placing the silly pirate hat atop his head once again. “I want you to list for me each member of the two families and their species, all right?”

“Um… well, there’s the Emerson family. That’s Nathaniel—he’s a Raichu, right?—Iphigenia, the Infernape, and their son Ignatius is a Monferno. Then there’s Iphigenia’s sister Corinna, also an Infernape, her husband Morris, an Empoleon, and their boy Terry, also a Monferno. Why?”

“Now, John… how well-versed are you in genetics? Specifically, how well do you understand Darnell’s Theory of the Transmission of Genes and Genetic Potential?”

John stared blankly at Sterling, partially confused by the abrupt change in subject and partially confused by the complicated-sounding term. “What?”

The nine-tailed fox laughed good-naturedly. “As you know, John, we Pokémon are quite a diverse and adaptable kingdom, whether one is speaking of an entire phylum or within members of a species. Many Pokémon have the capability to display abilities that do not correspond to their elemental alignment or alignments, am I right?”

“Well, yeah,” John said with a nod. “Like how a Luxray is an Electric-type but it can use Ice Fang, and all that.”

“That’s correct. However, many Pokémon have even more of these allegedly mismatched abilities than one might realize at first glance. According to Darnell, the potential to tap into such abilities exists in every member of a species. However, it is only potential; said abilities are usually dormant. To put it as simply as possible, in order for those abilities to be fully realized, some minor genetic modification is needed. This modification is generally achieved by cross-breeding with the male of another species that already has said ability.”

“Oh, okay… wait. What?”

With a patient sigh, Sterling simplified again. “The only way for a given Pokémon to do something, such as use an attack, that it is not normally able to do is for its father to be able to do said something already.”

John shook his head, frowning. “I… I guess I understand that. But what does that have to do with the case?”

Sterling leapt up from his seat and onto the desktop, once again causing the horrible pink feather atop his hat to wobble crazily. “It has everything to do with the case, my good man! If you’ll do me the courtesy of thinking back for a moment, you will recall that the surveillance video showed a Monferno using Thunderpunch to shatter the glass in the Emersons’ display case. Right?”

“Yeah…” John muttered.

“And I’m sure you know that the average Monferno is not capable of performing a proper Thunderpunch.”

“Yeah…”

“Therefore,” Sterling continued, “it stands to reason that the only way the culprit would have been able to execute a Thunderpunch is if he had inherited the ability from his father.”

“So… so… um…” John was still struggling. “That means… uh… what exactly does that mean, Reinhardt?”

“It means that Terry could not have been the one caught on tape stealing the ring. You said it yourself, John—Terry’s father, Morris, was an Empoleon. Empoleon is not, was not, and probably never will be capable of any electrical abilities whatsoever, and that includes Thunderpunch. If Morris is unable to use Thunderpunch, he cannot possibly pass the ability to do so onto his son.

“Ignatius, on the other hand, was sired by Nathaniel Emerson, a Raichu. Being an Electric-type himself, Nathaniel could easily have passed Thunderpunch down to his child. Therefore, while it is impossible for Terry to have known Thunderpunch, it is entirely possible that Ignatius did. And since the assault captured on the camera was undeniably a Thunderpunch, it had to have been Ignatius who stole the ring.” Sterling stepped down off of his desk, sat down decisively and reached for his wineglass.

John sighed and smiled, taking a sip of his own wine. “I get it now. You’ve done it again, Reinhardt Sterling. Nothing gets past you. It all flies over my poor head, of course, but never yours.”

“If I may be so bold as to correct you, John, I ‘did that again’ seven years ago. I do, however, like to think that I’m still as sharp as you say, if you’ll allow me just a little conceit.”

“Of course, of course, Reinhardt.” The two of them sat in silence for another minute or two, finishing off the last of their drinks. At last, John smiled again. “Give me another one, Reinhardt. Just one more, please. This is the last one, and I know I’ll get it this time…”

“Oh, John, what are you, five?” chortled Sterling. “I told you that that would be the very last one for today, and I intend to adhere to that statement.” The Ninetales stood up, stretched, adjusted his pirate hat once more and strode off towards the front door. “I’ll tell you what, my friend. Why don’t we head over to the bookstore? I’m sure they’re stocking plenty of those little ‘solve-it-yourself’ mystery books, full of little stories you can solve and with the answers conveniently located in the back so I don’t have to get a sore throat explaining everything to you. We’ll buy you one of those books, how does that sound?”

“A solve-it-yourself book, huh? I dunno, Reinhardt… sounds a little silly.” It was obvious by looking at the expression on the bear’s face, however, that he fancied the idea.

“Oh, don’t worry, John…” Sterling’s red eyes twinkled as he turned the doorknob. “If you ask me, it sounds like it might be a great deal of fun.”

*~*~*

So, yes. There's the answer! Negrek, mistysakura and Mew Trainer Rose all got the answer right, hooray! They were also the only people who guessed... o.O Don't be afraid to try your hand at these, people! It's supposed to be fun for everyone!

Anyway, our illustrious winners get... a cookie? Um, yeah, nothing planned in the way of any sort of prizes yet, but they might come. Yes. So, stay tuned for the next installment of Crazy like a Fox! Phoenix out!

Mew Trainer Rose
2nd July 2007, 09:55 AM
Yay! I got it right! *victory pose*

Clever way of explaining the game mechanics of breeding. I can't wait to see how else you'll explain such things. And what other mysteries you'll come up with. :)

mistysakura
4th July 2007, 08:58 PM
Funny, I could never solve these as a kid. Although the only reason I got it right this time was because you used D/P Pokemon in the family lines, which caught my eye (since I didn't even recognise the names were of Pokemon), so I proceeded to look them up in a decent Pokedex. Anyway, I agree with Mew Trainer Rose that your explanation of breeding abilities was clever, if a bit convoluted (But you can't help the way Sterling talks). Also, the explanation of the crime seemed to drag on a bit, but that's probably just because I guessed the answer right already. I'm looking forward to the next one.

Negrek
14th July 2007, 01:35 AM
I did say I would review eventually!

This is a rather uncommonly-attempted sort of story; Breezy wrote a 'fic a long while back along these lines, though it ended after the first chapter. Better luck to you with this one--it's a pretty cool idea.

Anyway, just going to begin as I normally do, reading through again and looking for any proofreading-ish issues that catch my eye...

- The use of "Teddy Ursa" to describe John in his intro paragraph is somewhat awkward. First, you say that he was nothing less than a very large Teddy Ursa, and then, a couple sentences later, you say that kids would describe him as being as soft and huggable as a Teddy Ursa. Essentially, it reads like you're saying, "He was really just a great big teddy bear. And he was as soft and huggable as a teddy bear." It kind of sounds redundant and awkward; saying one implies the other, if you know what I mean.

Also, I have to admit that the "Teddy Ursa" thing initially threw me as it did some other readers. I think it might help (or would've helped me, anyway) if you were to de-capitalize it. I spent a while trying to figure out if it was a play on some celebrity or somebody I was supposed to know (well, okay, it sort of is, but whatever) because the capitalization suggested to me that it was supposed to be a proper name.

- "The one that was turned into a fine arts center a few months back?"

Typo.

- "Being extremely possessive of their little trinkets, the Emersons had gone to great lengths to protect their treasures, installing elaborate security... and rooms of their estate, among other things."

And typos.

"...he cannot possibly pass the ability to do so on to his son."

Because you would say "He passed on the ability," not "He passed onto the ability," or something along those lines. Also, I think unto would work there as an alternative.

- The Oxford comma needs more love. I keep tripping over your lists and having to read them twice because whenever I see a list without the Oxford comma, I read it like something like this: "Eggs, milk, cheese-and-yogurt." I am not prepared for the lack of pause!

(I was not being entirely serious about that, if you couldn't tell. You can use or omit the comma however you like, of course, but I really do find it easier to read with the comma in and the unusual number of lists in this chapter made me really notice its absence.)

So! Not much to go over there; good job in proofreading and, uh, knowing grammar and stuff in general, I guess.

With regards to the actual story thus far, I like it overall. This introductory chapter gave us a good look at the main characters and also helped to establish the "case" and then "solution" and episodic format of the story. However, I didn't really enjoy the way that the information was presented in this particular installment. The fact that Sterling was only retelling the facts relating to a previous case, not actually solving one himself at the moment, meant both that the characters were not as fully explored as they could have been in this chapter and that, in general, it came off as a bit "talky."

The introductory portion of the introduction, where Sterling and his hat-loving tendencies were initially described, wasn't bad and is true to some specific genres of writing (of whicher, err, I can think of none at the moment, but whatever), but I'm really more a fan of showing the characters' personalities through their actions and allowing the reader to make judgements of their character for themselves. For example, if you had just done a scene where Sterling had arrived at the site of a case and was interacting with some of the major players, such as the police on the scene or some witnesses or whatever, and we'd very quickly get the picture that he's a quirky ninetales guy who talks funny, has a creepy grin, and likes to wear loud hats. The sort of "this is how it is" summary/intro on the characters wasn't pulled off poorly or anytyhing, but I think that it contributed to the sort of static feel of the story.

Sterling's case was recounted, rather than witnessed directly in the text, and as a result the case was made a little more confusing and a little less interesting than it could have been. First of all, there were tons of names and pokémon flying all over the place, and for someone with a chronic lack of ability to remember peoples' names and little exposure to the various characters involved meant that I had a bit of trouble distinguishing between the major players in the little crime. You did do a good job of giving the rich family more snobby names, but for some reason I kept on thinking that Morris was the raichu (I swear that's a better name for a raichu than an empoleon). In any case, just getting all the information relating to the case set in front of us via a fairly objective assessment did make for a decent enough puzzle, but not a really good story, if you know what I mean. What was going on in the background wasn't terribly exciting, either. Basically, it was a couple of guys sitting around, talking. They were bored, and I was kind of bored as well. Little things, like Sterling's movement around the room and fascination with his feather, gave it a bit of variety, but overall the setting and action were more a vehicle for the delivery of information than anything else. You didn't even get much milage out of Sterling's lovably eccentric character; with John being very used to his friend's quirks, we didn't even get the inherent humor that comes of setting a slightly out-there character upon a bunch of innocent, normal people who are totally unprepared for him.

Also, one thing that I still can't figure out and spent a lot of time trying to decide on was how, exactly, the characters are portrayed in the story. There are no humans in this world, but then are the characters just normal pokémon, or are they some sort of anthro? There seemed to be conflicting messages about this throughout the prose. For example, right at the beginning you refer to "a man like Sterling," while later on you describe him very blatantly as a "nine-tailed fox." The world certainly seems to be designed in a way that would make much more sense for anthros (I mean seriously, why would you even invent doorknobs when only like 20% of the pokémon population would be able to use them), but at the same time the characters occasionally took actions that would really only make sense for pokémon, like Sterling leaping onto his desk. Unless I'm getting quite the wrong picture of Sterling's house and his study, any normal-sized adult male leaping onto the desk would experience a bit of head trauma, or at least lose his hat. Or perhaps I've just become too accustomed to the rather ridiculously low ceilings of my house, although you said it was a ranch house, so...

In general, I just didn't found this story to present the case in a rather uninteresting fashion and not offer much in the way of story around it, either. It was a pleasant read, because your writing was in general spot-on and the characters are generally likeable and kept consistent, but I didn't really like the way that it was set up.

So, I did enjoy this, but I'd like to think that some of the later chapters will be better and that we'll get to see Sterling in action rather than just being exposed to his actions via his own recollections. You've got the solid base of good characters and an unusual premise to work off; I'm sure you'll be fine. In any case, good luck with the next installment, and I look forward to it!

mistysakura
15th July 2007, 05:47 AM
Negrek: I like discussing fics with people, so I hope you're okay with me resonding to your response.

I agree that the chapter was static because the characters were just sitting around talking about the case. It made for a decent introduction, but I trust they'll be getting out and doing stuff in teh future.

Oddly enough, I did like Phoenixsong telling us about Sterling. Usually I preach 'show, don't tell', but in this case I think the tongue-in-cheek description made for a more caricature-like picture of Sterling, which I enojyed as an introduction to his character, whereas if his quirks were shown ion action and we were left to draw our own conclusions he would have seemed less exaggerated and I would have been less amused. Of course, if this kept up we wouldn't see as much in-depth character development, but as an introduction I thought it worked well.

Negrek
15th July 2007, 04:42 PM
Not a problem. I won't disagree that the introduction as it was was done well, and that it was adequate; nevertheless, I think that interspersing pure description with action would be a more effective tactic, even if you didn't go over all the way to pure action or "showing." Sort of like in a movie intro where they'll do voice overs interspersed with action to emphasize and add humor to what's going on onscreen. Typically, it's an effect used for sort of comedic pieces like this one. In any case, I just don't think that more solid narration is what this introductory chapter really needs. Adding a little action could do a lot, I think, and if you wanted you could still preserve or even enhance the "caricature" effect by allowing action and narration to play off one another a bit.