The Hoenn Islands

[Tails2k2]

This fanfic is a trainer fic about the Hoenn Islands. If you'd like to know, the island that the first few chapters will take place on is the island directly south of Mossdeep City (you cannot get to it in the game). This island is Tailfeather Island. I hope that you enjoy my fic. ^_^

And don't worry, the next chapters will be longer.

--------------

Chapter 1


It was a cold Saturday morning, winter at Tailfeather Island. The sun still had not risen above the clouds, so the snow on Mount Cheerful’s top had not melted yet. Every winter morning, when the sun rose the snow would melt off of Mount Cheerful and flow into the cold Sootopolis Sea. A small flock of Delibird scatterered around at the top of the tall mountain, searching for berries. A Skarmory swooped by and grabbed a baby Delibird in its beak, carrying it off to its nest somewhere far away.
Tanner put down the binoculars and sighed.
“If only I could fly free like the bird Pokémon,” Tanner murmured to himself.
He glanced at the digital clock near his bedside. It was only 5:33 AM. Tanner would still have to endure another day being locked up inside Tailfeather Middle School, locked up like a bird in a cage.
He glanced over at his Torchic sitting there, sleeping in her birdcage. Tanner knew she didn’t like being locked up. She loved being free outdoors, like Tanner did.
“I wonder if I’ll ever get a Trainer’s Leave,” Tanner said to himself, looking at Torchic. “I’d take Torchic around and fight the Hoenn Gym Leaders, evolving him and catching new Pokémon. Then I’d be out of that hellhole.”
Tanner knew that he’d be looking forward to another boring day of school, getting bullied and taunted, getting his lunch money stolen, and getting publicly embarassed, like he was every day.
Tanner laid back down on his bed and soon fell asleep, dreaming that he was a Latios, soaring through the sky and protecting all of the other flying Pokémon from any danger. Unfortunately, in the middle of his dream, he was woken up by the squawking of Torchic and the yelling of his mother.
Tanner shot a look at the clock. It was 8:09 AM. He had missed the bus by almost ten minutes!
“Crap!” Tanner exclaimed as he leapt out of bed.
He quickly put his clothes on and hopped down the stairs, still trying to get one of his arms into the sleeve of his shirt.
“You missed the bus, Tanner, so I have to drive you in your father’s car, and make him late for work...again!” Tanner’s mother cried out.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I overslept!” Tanner said, trying to defend himself.
“Just get in the car, Tanner,” his mom said as Tanner walked out the door and over to the driveway.
He got into the car and his mother rushed out and drove him to school.
When they arrived, the bell had already rung, so Tanner was tardy. He got out of the car and walked to the attendance office, sighing.
“This is going to be a loooong day,”

[DannyBoy]

This is a ok start. You already have your pokemon so thats a good start and its original instead of going to a proffesor or something around the lines of that. You are right the length is short and you need to make it longer but this is just a start off. Your description is pretty good. It was a little hard to read. So after you get a description of something done skip a space in between and then for the dialouge skip a space write the quote then skip another space. That makes it much more clearer to read. Hope this helps some. Keep it up!

[Tails2k2]

Thanks for the input. ^_^ Here's Chapter 2.

--------

Chapter 2

“Late again, I see, Mr. Mason?” the school secretary, Mrs. Pickles, said to Tanner.
“Yes, I overslept.” Tanner said sheepishly.
Mrs. Pickles wrote up a tardy slip for Tanner and gave it to him. He rushed to his first period, Gym, but by the time he had got to the gymnasium, which was all the way across the school, the class was already over, and it was time for second period.
Jacob Brown walked out of the gymnasium with his group of friends as the bell rung and shoved Tanner out of his way. “So, Mason, guess you chickened out again today. Couldn’t even face me in basketball. Ha!” Jacob said to Tanner as he walked past him.
Tanner turned bright red.
“I...I didn’t...I didn’t mean to...what happened was...”
Jacob and his big group of friends all laughed at him.
“See you in fourth period, shrimp!” Jacob said obnoxiously.
Tanner turned even more red and he walked quickly to second period, Math, without saying a word. Math was Tanner’s worst subject because he never paid attention in class. He was always looking out the window at the bird Pokémon flying by.
He was doing this right now, looking at a wild Taillow strutting around and looking for Wurmples when his math teacher caught his attention.
“MR. MASON, ARE YOU LOOKING OUT THE WINDOW AGAIN?” his math teacher, Ms. Kane screeched.
Everyone in the room snickered as they saw Tanner’s face go from shocked to the same deep red as it had been earlier.
“No...sorry, Ms. Kane.” Tanner said.
And the class went on like that for an hour, with Tanner not paying attention, and Ms. Kane screaming at him and embarassing him in front of everyone in the entire room, and probably people in other rooms that could hear her loud, angry voice.
After what seemed like an eon, the bell finally rang and Tanner took his backpack to third period, Care for Pokémon. This was probably one of his best classes and had his favorite teacher, Mr. Davidson, teaching the class.
He made it into class and sat down just as the bell rang for class to start. Two of Jacob Brown’s friends, Tommy DaVinci and Rick Moore, came in right after him, lucky enough to not be counted as tardy.
“Okay, today we’ll be learning how to use a Potion,” said Mr. Davidson, with a big grin on his face. “The Tailfeather Island Pokémon Center has supplied us with some injured Pokémon in these Pokéballs so each of you take one and open the Pokéball up. I assume you know how to do that already, from our previous classes.”
Most of the class nodded, while a few others rolled their eyes at Mr. Davidson. Tanner grabbed a Pokéball and opened it, revealing a Spearow.
“Now, if you’ll all open your laptops, you’ll see that I’ve put a couple Potions into each of your School Folders. I’m hoping you know how to withdraw them, so do so, and try using them on your assigned Pokémon.” Mr. Davidson continued.
Tanner withdrew the Potions from his laptop, as did everyone else. He took one and sprayed it on the Spearow, which had been cawing loudly. The cawing stopped, and it looked as if the Spearow was almost grinning.
Mr. Davidson walked by and looked at the Spearow. “Very good job, Tanner. He looks fine. You must be a natural at this.”
Tanner blushed a little.
As soon as Mr. Davidson had walked past, Rick Moore turned around from his seat and took one of the Potions and sprayed Tanner in the eyes with it.
“OWW! Dammit!” Tanner exclaimed as everyone began to laugh at him.
Mr. Davidson spun around and realized what had happened.
“Tanner, watch your language in school and go down to the Nurse’s Office. And Rick, that’s a detention. See you Thursday.”
As Tanner walked toward the Nurse’s Office rubbing his eyes, he couldn’t help but sigh, knowing that he wouldn’t get a day off for another week, since they had made Saturday an official school day. Sundays were his only days off. Tanner almost growled to himself as he walked into the Nurse’s Office.
Nurse Bethany asked Tanner what happened.
“I got Potion sprayed in my eyes.” Tanner said, miserably.
“Oh, that’s nothing a couple eyedrops won’t fix.” Nurse Bethany said to Tanner, having Tanner lean back.
She squirted a couple of eyedrops in his eyes and within a few seconds they were all better.
“Thank you,” said Tanner, walking out.
Nurse Bethany smiled at him.
As Tanner walked back to class, he muttered to himself, “Why me? Why does it always have to be me?”

[DannyBoy]

Ok Chapter! Did you just write this or has it been done for awhile? You still need some work on making you chapters longer but its ok the same thing happened with me. I hope all your chapters wont be on school cause that is a little boring saying everything that happened in school. It is ok every once in awhile. Most times for a chapter it is usally another day or something but sometimes with cliff hangers its 1 day. Why don't you check out some other storys and in the Writers Lounge check out some of the posts there about writing a good trainer fic and that should halp you out more. Keep it up!

[Tails2k2]

I'm just writing this, and don't worry, I doubt that there will be ANY more school chapters left. Hope everyone enjoys this next installment!

----

Chapter 3

After Tanner had returned, everyone was already packing up and getting ready for their next class. Tanner quickly put his things away and was done just before the bell rang. It was time for lunch.
He opened his backpack and searched around for his lunch when he realized that he had forgotten it in his hurry to get to school. He smacked his head down on a table repeatedly, hating himself.
He walked over to the empty table that he always sat at and sighed, looking at the clock, waiting for lunch to be over.
Suddenly he was grabbed and pulled up into the air. Tanner shot a glance over to the person who was doing this, and realized quickly that it was Jacob Brown, looking for his daily lunch.
“So, Mason, where’s my lunch hiding at?” Jacob asked, sneering.
“I...I forgot it...please...please don’t...” Tanner explained.
“Don’t what? Do THIS?” Jacob said, punching Tanner in the stomach. His friends behind him, including Tommy DaVinci and Rick Moore were howling with laughter as they looked at Tanner who was out of breath. Suddenly, he began to turn white and stopped breathing.
“Oh...holy crap, let’s get out of here!” Jacob yelled, motioning for his crew to run away.
As Jacob ran off, a crowd of people gathered around Tanner, all of them saying things like “Oh man,” or “What happened?”
Then, Melanie Walker pushed her way through.
“Give him some space, everyone, we’re taking all the oxygen he has left!” she exclaimed, making everyone back up a couple of steps, while Melanie pulled out her cell phone and dialed 911.

***

Tanner awoke in Tailfeather Hospital a few hours later.
“Huh...what’s going on? Where am I?” he said, looking at the blurred faces looking down on him. He realized he was in a hospital bed, and the blurs began to go away. He recognized his parents, a girl he knew from school, and some doctors towering above him. “Wha...what happened?”
“You lost oxygen from a blow to the stomach and you passed out. Luckily, Miss Walker here immediatly called the paramedics. If she hadn’t, you’d probably would be dead by now.” one of the doctors explained.
“Oh, wow...thanks, Melody.” Tanner said.
“Melanie,” Melanie corrected him. “But it’s okay, you’re probably still a little woozy from the hit.”
“Yeah...” Tanner said.
“I’ve got to go now,” Melanie said. “Tanner, don’t forget about the Sunday Trainer’s Assembly tomorrow at 10 AM.”
Tanner nodded and Melanie walked out as Tanner drifted off to sleep.

***

Tanner woke up the next day under his own bedsheets. He looked over at the clock and it was 8:50 AM. Tanner stretched and got up out of bed. He grabbed his binoculars and looked through them out the large, glass window.
On top of Mount Cheerful, the flock of Delibird was still there, and the Skarmory was still hovering above looking for prey. After hovering, the Skarmory finally made a graceful swoop towards the flock and picked up another baby Delibird in its jaws and flew off.
Tanner put down the binoculars and remembered the Sunday Trainer’s Assembly.
“Maybe today will be my day to be free.” Tanner said to himself. “Then again...the last two assemblies weren’t my day, so why should this one be?”
Tanner sighed and walked downstairs to eat breakfast.
After he had finished eating, he realized it was already 9:40 AM, so he rushed out the door and hopped on the bus, just before it closed its doors. He sat down in the front of the bus on the right side, and not many people sat near him.
He heard Jacob laughing with his buddies in the back, probably about Tanner’s misfortune the day before.
Tanner sighed once more and stared out the window at the wild Pokémon outside until the bus came to a halt at the school.
Tanner walked into the auditorium and sat next to some people he didn’t know. He knew it didn’t matter since he wouldn’t be talking to them during the assembly.
The principal, Mr. White, walked up to the podium.
“All right, children, settle down, it’s time to announce the ten new people who will be getting a Trainer’s Leave.” Mr. White said into the microphone.
Everyone quited down as Mr. White cleared his throat and looked at a paper.
“Brown, Jacob.” Mr. White said.
Jacob and his friends leapt up and started cheering for him.
“DaVinci, Tommy.” Mr. White said, ignoring Jacob’s cheers.
Jacob’s group’s cheers got even louder.
“Elmer, August.” Mr. White said, continuing on, and still ignoring the cheers of Jacob’s group. “Gustavson, Erika.”
The gleeful scream of a girl came out from the crowd, and yet Mr. White still ignored it, as he did every Sunday Trainer’s Assembly, each month.
“Joseph, Harvey.” Mr. White then said, getting the attention of Tanner. Harvey Joseph had been one of his friends until he began to lose touch with him and eventually drift away from him completely.
“Lane, Mary-Ann.” Mr. White said, continuing on. “Mason, Tanner.”
Tanner’s eyes went wide and stomach lurched after Mr. White said his name. He couldn’t believe it! He didn’t say anything to anyone, however, and held his excitement in for later. He thought to himself, missing Martin, James, Sullivan, Marshall, and Walker, Melanie.
“All of your laptops have been updated with a Trainer Card and Pokédex, which prove you have been given a Trainer’s Leave.” Mr. White said. “Congratulations to those who were called, and those who weren’t, better luck next time.”

[DannyBoy]

Ok, that was a little longer. You still need to work on the description like what the surrondings look like what the cloths you are wearing looks like. Just little things could make it better. But now he is going on trianers leave thats new and intresting. I wonder if he will have better luck trainning. Did you check out the writers lounge yet? Keep it up!

[Tails2k2]

Yay! New chapter!

----

Chapter 4

After the assembly was over, the ten people who were called were brought down to a room where they could call their parents and tell them the good news. After everyone had, Mr. White explained some things to them.
“I know that most of you are going to want to enter the Pokémon League. As you should know by now, you need eight badges to enter. There are two paths to get eight badges. You can take an airplane from Tailfeather Island to Rustboro City and start from there or you can go through the island routes and then take a ship to Mauville City. You’ll all need to decide now so we can get you tickets for the airplane.” Mr. White explained.
After some of the people talked to each other for a short while, mostly everyone had made up their mind. Mr. White stood in front of each person and asked what they would like to do.
“Jacob, you first.” Mr. White said.
“Airplane,” said Jacob.
“And you, Mr. DaVinci?”
“Also airplane,” Tommy replied.
Mr. White moved along and Erika Gustavson, Mary-Ann Lane, and Marshall Sullivan also decided to go on the airplane, while August Elmer, Harvey Joseph, James Martin, Melanie Walker, and Tanner decided to take the island routes.
Mr. White gave the tickets to the people who needed them and sent everyone off.
As they left, he cried out, “Remember what you learned in school! Always travel with partners!”
August Elmer and James Martin had decided that they would go on their journey together, since they were good friends, so that left Tanner, Harvey, and Melanie.
“Okay, I guess this means we’re all travelling together.” Melanie said.
“Yep,” said Harvey.
“All right,” said Tanner.
“Hold on. We should go get Pokémon and items we have first before we leave. We’ll meet each other in front of Tailfeather Fields.” Harvey said.
“That’s a good idea.” said Tanner.
Melanie nodded, and everyone ran back to their respective homes. On his way home, Tanner was very excited, though had an awkward feeling about travelling with a girl. Tanner had never been very good with talking to girls, though it seemed to come natural when he talked to Melanie, which he assumed he would have to do a lot since they were travelling together.
Tanner finally arrived home, since he didn’t live too close to the school. Luckily, he lived pretty close to Tailfeather Fields. He walked into his house and immediatly ran upstairs. He grabbed a backpack and looked around his room. He grabbed Torchic’s Pokéball and opened her cage, returning her to her Pokéball. He opened his closet and dug around the clothes inside to find his Pokébelt, which he put around his waist and put Torchic’s Pokéball in.
He put in a few changes of clothes and then opened the drawers on his dresser. He put his wallet in his pocket, and shoved some spare Pokéballs, Pokémon Food, and Potions into the backpack. He grabbed his binoculars and his laptop and threw those in too. He looked around the room, checking to see if he had missed anything, and then promptly zipped up his backpack and threw it around his shoulder.
He ran downstairs and out the door, and rushed to Tailfeather Fields, where Harvey and Melanie were already waiting.
“What took you so long?” asked Harvey.
“I don’t live that close to the school...” Tanner said.
“Oh, okay then,” Harvey replied.
“Are we all ready to go then?” Melanie asked.
“Yup,” said Harvey.
“All right! Let’s go!” said Melanie.
Tanner, Harvey, and Melanie walked into Tailfeather Fields, unaware of the dangers lurking in the tall grass.

[DannyBoy]

Ok, chapter. Ok I am not trying to be mean or anything but you still need to work on this. Make you chapters longer and full of description. You are getting good with the description but the lenght needs to be longer. Take you time on your chapters don't rush. Some people wait a day or two or a few days to write a new chapter to make it good. I gurantee if you take your time it will be better. I like the idea of the idea you could start by going with the plane or the boat and plane. That is different. With some hard work and time this should be good. Keep it up!