As I Walk Down the Path (poem, G)

[Pewter City Geodude]

-Disclaimer- I don't own the Pokemon franchise, blah blah blah. You know the rest.


As I Walk Down the Path



As I walk down the path,
The sun shines all around me,
Its fingers reaching through the plants and trees.
New life is happening everywhere this spring.

As I walk down the path,
I reflect on my own new life,
As I stare at the little ball in my hand,
Containing my new friend and loyal partner.

As I walk down the path,
I remember receiving my new friend,
The Professor smiling as he handed me the Pokeball,
Then came more empty Pokeballs, and my new Pokedex.

As I walk down the path,
I think about what lies ahead,
The adventures and experiences we'll share,
My Bulbasaur and I, together as one.

As I walk down the path,
I ponder the wonderful world of Pokemon,
As I'll now experience it firsthand,
My Bulbasaur and I, together as one.

As I walk down the path,
I wonder if I can train the untrainable,
Discover a Pokemon nobody has yet found,
Or even just catch a glimpse of a Legendary.

As I walk down the path,
I hear a rustle in the bushes up ahead.
A Rattata pops out, and I release my Bulbasaur.
After all, you've gotta start somewhere, right?

[mr_pikachu]

This was a nice poem, though it could have used a more even rhythm. Not that I have a problem with an erratic beat, but some people consider it more difficult to read and enjoy. The theme was a bit overused, so you have to remember to stand out, even if it is a poem. Also, a rhyme scheme of some sort might be nice, though others may disagree. All in all, you did a good job, but you also have room for improvement, as we all do. Keep working on your poetic pieces, and I'm sure you'll do just fine. :yes:

[PancaKe]

I liked that poem. In fact, there is a poetry corner somewhere around here that I was looking for that you can post your poetry n stuff at. That would have fitted perfectly in the poetry corner. When I find it and bump it or repost a new one post that and other works of yours into it.

Anyway, that poem was really nice, it was a different change to the typical rhyming poems you get. I enjoyed reading it, the ending bit was especially nice, ending on a happier positive note than some poems. Rhyming and rhythm doesnt really matter that much, but it is good to have a rhythm. I didn't actually notice an edgy rhythm like mr pika said so *shrugs* to what he said.

And mr pika - just to cause trouble and be mean :P not seriously - but I didn't notice anything about an overused theme. Thats how some poems are and I quite like that type of poem :p I'm so mean trying to cause trouble just because I'm bigger.

I liked your poem. Its got snazz. whatever that means

~Mist

[Pewter City Geodude]

Thanks guys. :) I suck at the ones that actually have to rhyme though.

[Nikku-San]

Wow, you really captured the essence of starting out on a Pokemon journey. It's peaces like that that remind me why I just love Pokemon. Good job. :)

[Pewter City Geodude]

Thanks again. :) It is kind of an intriguing concept at that isn't it? I think us Poke-veterans take the experiences of a new trainer for granted sometimes.