PancaKe
21st April 2004, 11:42 PM
I wasn't going to post this at all - but I showed it to Gavin, and he convinced me to. I wrote it for a school assignment, to wrtie a story with the themes of violence, and prejudice and racism. And the first thing that came to my head was the way that Christians are perescuted daily for their faith. So that's what my story is about. It's only something short - but heavy issues are dealt with in this story - and I am very sorry if I offend anyone. If i do offend anyone, please tell me. Because that is not my intention.
**PancaKe||
North
By Tara
1
Sunday evening.
The sky had already become the purple of a sunset, pink streaks shooting through the clouds. The grass was slowly becoming damp underneath me, but I wasn't paying much attention to the grass. Life was too short to sit and feel the grass get wet.
Cody was next to me. His feet were kicking in the air, as he babbled on about nothing in particular. It was only six fifteen; the church service didn't start for another fifteen minutes, so we decided not to let the rest of the day slip away.
"It's been really cool, today has," Cody spoke, breaking the silence. He continued to kick his feet in the air, losing a shoe in the process. He got up and went to retrieve it.
"I know," I agreed, sighing. I watched him walk over and pick up his shoe.
"Can you believe it? There’s less than a week until the youth group camp!’ Cody announced, excitement rushing to affect his voice. He turned to me, his eyes sparkling.’Only a week! That’s seven days!’
‘It’s more like five days,’ I corrected him.’It’s on Friday.’
‘Whatever!’ Cody threw his shoe at me. I was always correcting him and others, so I guess I deserved it. But still, I didn’t deserve it in the face. Cody ran over to me.’Are you all right? I’m so sorry!’
I picked up his shoe, and hit him with it.’You should be!’ I exclaimed. I grinned at him and he grinned back. All of a sudden, I found him on top of me. The wind was squashed right out of my body, as he smothered me in a hug. I hugged back; he was my best friend after all.
He got up, and pulled me up with him.’We’d better get inside. It’s going to be an awesome service tonight.’
*
The place was packed. No room to move. People had tried to sit in the aisles at the beginning, but weren’t allowed due to fire regulations. I couldn’t believe the feeling that was in the room at the end of the talk. There was such a feeling of God in the air. So many people were crying, shaking, screaming, laughing It was too awesome to describe.
‘Ami.’ Cody’s voice entered my ear suddenly.’Ami, can you feel God here?’
His voice was shaken. It startled me.’Yes,’ I replied.’I can feel him.’
‘I can feel something else,’ Cody began. I turned around, and looked up at him. He was much taller than I, and usually hid his feelings from the world. Tonight, he looked different. His shining eyes, they looked troubled, and the happy spark was gone.
‘What?’ I watched him, but he didn’t look as excited as he had before. Worried, perhaps, but not excited and happy. I was concerned.
‘Something is going to happen tonight,’ he told me.’Can’t you feel it?’ Cody smiled briefly at me, a small, sad smile.’Whatever happens, I’ll see you there.’
*
There was a scream, a shriek, and a crack. People began to push in all different directions, climbing over chairs, running through the room. The place became chaotic. For one of the first times in my life, I saw visible fear in Cody’s chocolate irises. Another crack followed. Confusion was throughout the room. People rushed everywhere. I tried to move across, out the aisle with Cody. Somebody running across the pews pushed me out the way, knocking me to the ground.
‘Cody!’ I yelled.’Where are you?’
Cody’s hand gripped mine firmly, and he yanked me up. We ran, his hand still gripping mine, through the mass of people. I felt as though I was at an overcrowded concert, being squashed everywhere. Most of all, I was scared.
I was so scared. My heart was pounding at least a kilometer an hour; my skin, coated with sweat. It wasn’t nice, but I wasn’t about to stop and worry about things like that. Cody turned around, and pulled me close to him. I could feel his rapid heartbeat as I tried to hide against his chest. My stomach was tied into a thousand knots. I didn’t know what was going on.
‘I’m scared, Cody,’ I told him, clinging on for dear life.’What’s going on?’
Cody held me tight. This was so not like him. Usually he would just stay right off me, right away from me in the physical side of things. Tonight, though, my heart just felt like it was going to burst. Not because of its rate, but because it was overflowing with love for Cody. I loved him so much, he was my best friend, and I was scared for the both of us.
‘They have guns,’ Cody replied into my ear, confirming what I thought was true. I began to cry. One half of me was trying not to cry, because I didn’t want to be a wimp, or a wuss, in front of Cody. The other half wanted me to bawl, to show how I felt, and to take the sympathy. The tears rolled down my cheeks.
‘We have to get out of here.’ I looked up at Cody, and he nodded, showing me he heard. Still holding my hand, we ducked through the crowds, and through the door. Outside, there were more bad people with guns.
Why were they attacking us? What had we done? What did they need to come and harass a God filled environment for? I wanted the answers. I called them out to God, I yelled out to him to get rid of them. As we ran, I screamed for God to not let those die who had not given their lives back yet. I screamed out for him.
’Lord, don’t let us all die! I always wanted to die for my faith, but please get rid of them! Too many non-Christians will be hurt by this. Too many people will be hurt by this. Please don’t take anybody. If you have to take someone, let it be me, please Lord, let it be me!’
And there was a crack.
Cody pulled me down, and we rolled down the grassy slope, tumbling head over heels. And we stopped.
I looked over to Cody.
He lay on the grass.
‘Come on, Cody, get up,’ I pleaded in between gasps. I tried to catch my breath. Cody didn’t move. I poked him side.’Come on, Cody,’ I pleaded again.’We have to keep running!’ I pushed him, and he flopped over to the
side.
The grass was a funny shade of red underneath him.
He hadn’t pulled me down.
I didn’t want it to be true.
‘Cody, come on,’ I said, scared.’Don’t play around any more. We have to go.’
He didn’t move.
’What ever happens, I’ll see you there.’
I didn’t want him there. I wanted him here, with me.
My heart tore into two. Then those two piece shattered, the shards of broken heart falling to the ground. They were too sharp to pick up. I tried to place them together again, but I bled. My soul wept.
I was alone in my world.
’My Lord, please don’t let it be true. Please, make it all a dream. I’m going to wake up soon, aren’t I? No I’m not Let Cody wake up, please Lord, bring him back ’
But Cody was gone.
2
‘Rock for God.’
‘Jesus Freak?’
‘What is that stuff?’
‘I don’t know. Jesus forever, Satan never?’
‘Ha. Jesus is a fag.’
I held my chin up high and kept walking, ignoring the girls behind me. They started off by reading my bag, but Tegan and Kasey were just going to ridicule me for being a Christian. I was used to it, but it was a bit harsh now. I walked alone, hoping they would lose interest and start talking about a CD or something.
‘Hey, Freak!’ Tegan called. I looked around.
‘Yeah?’ I asked.
‘Hey, you’re that girl,’ Tegan began.
‘Yeah, I’m a girl,’ I replied.
‘You were at that Christian massacre the other week weren’t you?’ Tegan asked.
I nodded, trying not to remember. Trying not to remember the fear, the horror, and the losses that night.
‘I heard a rumor that they missed a person,’ Tegan started, snidely. I wish she would shut up. I didn’t need to hear this, especially now. I turned my back to them.
I tried to ignore her. Tried to block out the sound of her voice.
‘Good riddance, really,’ Tegan continued.’Ever since they killed Jesus, the world’s been filled with Jesus Wannabes. Hey look at that, there’s one in front of us.’
My eyes filled with tears.
‘But now, there’s a lot less,’ Tegan smiled nastily, nodding as she finished.
A tear rolled down my cheek. I turned around once more.’What did he ever do to you but love you? What did he ever do to you aside from think you were good enough to die for? What have I ever done to you?’ I asked.’Please don’t talk about the other week. I lost my best friend there, and I don’t want to remember it. It’s hard enough without you teasing me about it.’
Teresa stopped her laughter, and glanced at Kasey. Kasey looked at Tegan, questioning what her next move was. Tegan grinned.
‘Aww, Jesus’s little baby is crying. Do you want a tissue?’ Tegan asked.
‘Tegan. Please! Leave me alone!’ I cried. Memories came back of the other week. It was so similar; I was being persecuted for my faith.
Just like Cody.
I could see him, lying there, on the grass. Me crying next to him, bawling my eyes out. The guys with guns running to see whether we were okay. Hiding underneath him so that they would think I was dead too. Staying there, not wanting to leave him. Although he had already gone.
And now I stood here, alone, Tegan throwing insults at me left, right and center. All because of my faith.
If I was a Buddist girl, she would’ve been in big trouble. If I were an Indian Hindu, she could’ve been called up to the principal. If I were a Muslim in a head scarf, she could’ve been down at the police station now, answering questions.
But I was neither of those.
I was merely a Jesus Wannabe.
And nobody noticed the millions of Jesus Wannabe’s that got persecuted every day for their faith.
3
I tried to avoid Tegan all week. My friends knew better than to mention Cody, unless I brought up the topic. My teachers understood how I was feeling, and understood why I would break down in the middle of class. Even my family could tell when I was feeling all right and when I was devastated that he wasn’t here anymore.
But Jesus was always with me. He gave me hope. Because Jesus never left my side, he never changed. Just like north was always north, Jesus stayed the same.
North was always north, Jesus was always Christ. It had a ring to it.
I grabbed my texta from my bag, and began to write it on my bag.
My maths teacher would have gone off at me a few weeks ago. But I was still fragile from the event, and she didn’t dare yell at me. I wondered how long this would last, it wasn’t too bad. But I would give anything, even special treatment, for the return of Cody.
The class I most dreaded was now science. I’d always hated it, but now there was an empty space next to me, and there was nothing to go to science for. Science had always been a big joke. Cody had always been the punch line.
The substitute teacher walked in, and we took our seats. Before he could call the role, head teacher of science entered with Tegan. She chewed her gum, and played with her black hair, eyeing the sub.
The sub and the head teacher exchanged whispers, before letting Tegan go and take a seat.
’Lord, Lord please don’t let her sit next to me. Please don’t let her come near me. I don’t want to think about it today, please don’t let her give me trouble again. I don’t want to be reminded, I hurt so badly already Jesus! Please hold me and keep me safe from her. Please, let her see, that you really are not the God she may know, and that you love her enough to die for her. Please soften her heart and show your love to her. Amen’
‘Hello, Jesus wannabe,’ Tegan hissed, sitting next to me.
’GOD! What did I just ask you? Dude, stop messing round with me here!’
‘Hi,’ I replied nervously. My stomach tied itself into a hundred knots.
Tegan reached out for my diary, and began to flick through it.
‘Ami?’ the sub called.
I lifted my arm.’Here.’
The sub continued calling names.
‘Cody?’ he yelled.
Great. I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes.
‘Cody?’ he repeated.
Tegan looked up, and glanced at me.’Sir, he’s dead,’ she informed him.
‘Don’t talk like that,’ the sub scolded.’Is Cody here?’
‘No!’ Tegan yelled.’He’s dead!’
‘You, be quiet or you’re going to the staff room,’ the sub threatened.
‘But Sir! Cody died the other week in the Christian massacre!’ Tegan told him at the top of her lungs.
I couldn’t handle this any more.
’Lord! Make her stop! Why is she saying this? It’s hurting me, it’s cutting me deeper. I I need to leave the room, Lord. Please come with me.’
I got up, my eyes streaming tears, and walked out the room. I sat in the corridor, trying to calm myself down. I was a nervous wreck lately, anything made me cry. What had happened to me?
Inside, Tegan and the sub were having a loud argument. People from other classes were trying to look inside to see what was going on.
‘Sir, why would I make something up like that? Ami left the room, crying. Gee I wonder why? Cody was her best friend, and you’re too stupid to realize that I’m not’ she swore loudly’lying and I’m telling the truth, and that he really did die!’
‘Get to the staffroom,’ the sub bellowed.’How dare you!’
‘Even ask the head teacher!’ Tegan screamed.’You dumb’ she swore once more, before leaving the room, slamming the door hard behind her.
‘What did you do that for?’ I asked through tears.
‘I don’t know.’ Tegan shrugged, then swore.’That sub was too stupid to realize that Cody was dead. Anyway, I hate him.’
’Lord, what is going on? Why did she stick up for me? Was she doing it to be nice, or was she really just looking for an opportunity to put **** on me, and on Cody? Or are you giving me an opportunity? Is this why this is happening? Because I can save Tegan? Please! Soften her heart, Lord, please make her wonder about us! Please let her come to know your love, just as I do!’
Tegan took a seat next to me.
‘You know, you didn’t have to fight like that.’
Tegan shrugged.’Nothing better to do anyway. Don’t even know why head teacher swapped classes for me. I’m not even that smart. Probably just a dumb’ she finished with the f word.
‘You swear a lot,’ I commented.’How come?’
‘Because it makes my talking more colourful?’ Tegan shrugged.’I’ve never really thought about that. But you don’t swear at all. You’re a freak of nature.’
‘I’m a freak of Jesus,’ I corrected.
‘Yeah,’ Tegan nodded.’You’re just a stupid Jesus Wannabe.’
‘One who doesn’t swear,’ I added, half smiling.
Tegan smiled back. For a moment, I thought I saw something light behind her eyes.
‘You know, you’re such a freak,’ she began. The light had gone.’Cody died for a good cause. Jesus was murdured for a good cause.’
‘I know,’ I replied, trying to hold back the tears that were about to flow.
‘Yeah, how could you know?’ Tegan demanded, becoming nasty.
‘Jesus was killed because he was sent to take the death that everybody should get. Because he loves us so much, he didn’t want us to not be his friends. So he took what we should have gotten for not being friends with him and not letting him come in our lives. And after he died, he rose.’
‘This guy, rose from the dead? What bull-’
‘No, please, hear me out. He rose, and because he rose, he beat death. Defeated death, and now we can be friends with him and go to heaven and be with him, because he defeated the second death.’
‘Oh, so now we die more than once?’
‘Body, and spiritual. When you’re body dies, if God hasn’t made your spirit alive, then that dies too.’
‘What’s the’ she swore point in that if it wasn’t alive in the first place?’
The sub burst out the room. ‘What are you doing here? I sent you to the staff room! You,’ he snapped, pointing to me. ‘Get inside now, unless you want to join her.’
**PancaKe||
North
By Tara
1
Sunday evening.
The sky had already become the purple of a sunset, pink streaks shooting through the clouds. The grass was slowly becoming damp underneath me, but I wasn't paying much attention to the grass. Life was too short to sit and feel the grass get wet.
Cody was next to me. His feet were kicking in the air, as he babbled on about nothing in particular. It was only six fifteen; the church service didn't start for another fifteen minutes, so we decided not to let the rest of the day slip away.
"It's been really cool, today has," Cody spoke, breaking the silence. He continued to kick his feet in the air, losing a shoe in the process. He got up and went to retrieve it.
"I know," I agreed, sighing. I watched him walk over and pick up his shoe.
"Can you believe it? There’s less than a week until the youth group camp!’ Cody announced, excitement rushing to affect his voice. He turned to me, his eyes sparkling.’Only a week! That’s seven days!’
‘It’s more like five days,’ I corrected him.’It’s on Friday.’
‘Whatever!’ Cody threw his shoe at me. I was always correcting him and others, so I guess I deserved it. But still, I didn’t deserve it in the face. Cody ran over to me.’Are you all right? I’m so sorry!’
I picked up his shoe, and hit him with it.’You should be!’ I exclaimed. I grinned at him and he grinned back. All of a sudden, I found him on top of me. The wind was squashed right out of my body, as he smothered me in a hug. I hugged back; he was my best friend after all.
He got up, and pulled me up with him.’We’d better get inside. It’s going to be an awesome service tonight.’
*
The place was packed. No room to move. People had tried to sit in the aisles at the beginning, but weren’t allowed due to fire regulations. I couldn’t believe the feeling that was in the room at the end of the talk. There was such a feeling of God in the air. So many people were crying, shaking, screaming, laughing It was too awesome to describe.
‘Ami.’ Cody’s voice entered my ear suddenly.’Ami, can you feel God here?’
His voice was shaken. It startled me.’Yes,’ I replied.’I can feel him.’
‘I can feel something else,’ Cody began. I turned around, and looked up at him. He was much taller than I, and usually hid his feelings from the world. Tonight, he looked different. His shining eyes, they looked troubled, and the happy spark was gone.
‘What?’ I watched him, but he didn’t look as excited as he had before. Worried, perhaps, but not excited and happy. I was concerned.
‘Something is going to happen tonight,’ he told me.’Can’t you feel it?’ Cody smiled briefly at me, a small, sad smile.’Whatever happens, I’ll see you there.’
*
There was a scream, a shriek, and a crack. People began to push in all different directions, climbing over chairs, running through the room. The place became chaotic. For one of the first times in my life, I saw visible fear in Cody’s chocolate irises. Another crack followed. Confusion was throughout the room. People rushed everywhere. I tried to move across, out the aisle with Cody. Somebody running across the pews pushed me out the way, knocking me to the ground.
‘Cody!’ I yelled.’Where are you?’
Cody’s hand gripped mine firmly, and he yanked me up. We ran, his hand still gripping mine, through the mass of people. I felt as though I was at an overcrowded concert, being squashed everywhere. Most of all, I was scared.
I was so scared. My heart was pounding at least a kilometer an hour; my skin, coated with sweat. It wasn’t nice, but I wasn’t about to stop and worry about things like that. Cody turned around, and pulled me close to him. I could feel his rapid heartbeat as I tried to hide against his chest. My stomach was tied into a thousand knots. I didn’t know what was going on.
‘I’m scared, Cody,’ I told him, clinging on for dear life.’What’s going on?’
Cody held me tight. This was so not like him. Usually he would just stay right off me, right away from me in the physical side of things. Tonight, though, my heart just felt like it was going to burst. Not because of its rate, but because it was overflowing with love for Cody. I loved him so much, he was my best friend, and I was scared for the both of us.
‘They have guns,’ Cody replied into my ear, confirming what I thought was true. I began to cry. One half of me was trying not to cry, because I didn’t want to be a wimp, or a wuss, in front of Cody. The other half wanted me to bawl, to show how I felt, and to take the sympathy. The tears rolled down my cheeks.
‘We have to get out of here.’ I looked up at Cody, and he nodded, showing me he heard. Still holding my hand, we ducked through the crowds, and through the door. Outside, there were more bad people with guns.
Why were they attacking us? What had we done? What did they need to come and harass a God filled environment for? I wanted the answers. I called them out to God, I yelled out to him to get rid of them. As we ran, I screamed for God to not let those die who had not given their lives back yet. I screamed out for him.
’Lord, don’t let us all die! I always wanted to die for my faith, but please get rid of them! Too many non-Christians will be hurt by this. Too many people will be hurt by this. Please don’t take anybody. If you have to take someone, let it be me, please Lord, let it be me!’
And there was a crack.
Cody pulled me down, and we rolled down the grassy slope, tumbling head over heels. And we stopped.
I looked over to Cody.
He lay on the grass.
‘Come on, Cody, get up,’ I pleaded in between gasps. I tried to catch my breath. Cody didn’t move. I poked him side.’Come on, Cody,’ I pleaded again.’We have to keep running!’ I pushed him, and he flopped over to the
side.
The grass was a funny shade of red underneath him.
He hadn’t pulled me down.
I didn’t want it to be true.
‘Cody, come on,’ I said, scared.’Don’t play around any more. We have to go.’
He didn’t move.
’What ever happens, I’ll see you there.’
I didn’t want him there. I wanted him here, with me.
My heart tore into two. Then those two piece shattered, the shards of broken heart falling to the ground. They were too sharp to pick up. I tried to place them together again, but I bled. My soul wept.
I was alone in my world.
’My Lord, please don’t let it be true. Please, make it all a dream. I’m going to wake up soon, aren’t I? No I’m not Let Cody wake up, please Lord, bring him back ’
But Cody was gone.
2
‘Rock for God.’
‘Jesus Freak?’
‘What is that stuff?’
‘I don’t know. Jesus forever, Satan never?’
‘Ha. Jesus is a fag.’
I held my chin up high and kept walking, ignoring the girls behind me. They started off by reading my bag, but Tegan and Kasey were just going to ridicule me for being a Christian. I was used to it, but it was a bit harsh now. I walked alone, hoping they would lose interest and start talking about a CD or something.
‘Hey, Freak!’ Tegan called. I looked around.
‘Yeah?’ I asked.
‘Hey, you’re that girl,’ Tegan began.
‘Yeah, I’m a girl,’ I replied.
‘You were at that Christian massacre the other week weren’t you?’ Tegan asked.
I nodded, trying not to remember. Trying not to remember the fear, the horror, and the losses that night.
‘I heard a rumor that they missed a person,’ Tegan started, snidely. I wish she would shut up. I didn’t need to hear this, especially now. I turned my back to them.
I tried to ignore her. Tried to block out the sound of her voice.
‘Good riddance, really,’ Tegan continued.’Ever since they killed Jesus, the world’s been filled with Jesus Wannabes. Hey look at that, there’s one in front of us.’
My eyes filled with tears.
‘But now, there’s a lot less,’ Tegan smiled nastily, nodding as she finished.
A tear rolled down my cheek. I turned around once more.’What did he ever do to you but love you? What did he ever do to you aside from think you were good enough to die for? What have I ever done to you?’ I asked.’Please don’t talk about the other week. I lost my best friend there, and I don’t want to remember it. It’s hard enough without you teasing me about it.’
Teresa stopped her laughter, and glanced at Kasey. Kasey looked at Tegan, questioning what her next move was. Tegan grinned.
‘Aww, Jesus’s little baby is crying. Do you want a tissue?’ Tegan asked.
‘Tegan. Please! Leave me alone!’ I cried. Memories came back of the other week. It was so similar; I was being persecuted for my faith.
Just like Cody.
I could see him, lying there, on the grass. Me crying next to him, bawling my eyes out. The guys with guns running to see whether we were okay. Hiding underneath him so that they would think I was dead too. Staying there, not wanting to leave him. Although he had already gone.
And now I stood here, alone, Tegan throwing insults at me left, right and center. All because of my faith.
If I was a Buddist girl, she would’ve been in big trouble. If I were an Indian Hindu, she could’ve been called up to the principal. If I were a Muslim in a head scarf, she could’ve been down at the police station now, answering questions.
But I was neither of those.
I was merely a Jesus Wannabe.
And nobody noticed the millions of Jesus Wannabe’s that got persecuted every day for their faith.
3
I tried to avoid Tegan all week. My friends knew better than to mention Cody, unless I brought up the topic. My teachers understood how I was feeling, and understood why I would break down in the middle of class. Even my family could tell when I was feeling all right and when I was devastated that he wasn’t here anymore.
But Jesus was always with me. He gave me hope. Because Jesus never left my side, he never changed. Just like north was always north, Jesus stayed the same.
North was always north, Jesus was always Christ. It had a ring to it.
I grabbed my texta from my bag, and began to write it on my bag.
My maths teacher would have gone off at me a few weeks ago. But I was still fragile from the event, and she didn’t dare yell at me. I wondered how long this would last, it wasn’t too bad. But I would give anything, even special treatment, for the return of Cody.
The class I most dreaded was now science. I’d always hated it, but now there was an empty space next to me, and there was nothing to go to science for. Science had always been a big joke. Cody had always been the punch line.
The substitute teacher walked in, and we took our seats. Before he could call the role, head teacher of science entered with Tegan. She chewed her gum, and played with her black hair, eyeing the sub.
The sub and the head teacher exchanged whispers, before letting Tegan go and take a seat.
’Lord, Lord please don’t let her sit next to me. Please don’t let her come near me. I don’t want to think about it today, please don’t let her give me trouble again. I don’t want to be reminded, I hurt so badly already Jesus! Please hold me and keep me safe from her. Please, let her see, that you really are not the God she may know, and that you love her enough to die for her. Please soften her heart and show your love to her. Amen’
‘Hello, Jesus wannabe,’ Tegan hissed, sitting next to me.
’GOD! What did I just ask you? Dude, stop messing round with me here!’
‘Hi,’ I replied nervously. My stomach tied itself into a hundred knots.
Tegan reached out for my diary, and began to flick through it.
‘Ami?’ the sub called.
I lifted my arm.’Here.’
The sub continued calling names.
‘Cody?’ he yelled.
Great. I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes.
‘Cody?’ he repeated.
Tegan looked up, and glanced at me.’Sir, he’s dead,’ she informed him.
‘Don’t talk like that,’ the sub scolded.’Is Cody here?’
‘No!’ Tegan yelled.’He’s dead!’
‘You, be quiet or you’re going to the staff room,’ the sub threatened.
‘But Sir! Cody died the other week in the Christian massacre!’ Tegan told him at the top of her lungs.
I couldn’t handle this any more.
’Lord! Make her stop! Why is she saying this? It’s hurting me, it’s cutting me deeper. I I need to leave the room, Lord. Please come with me.’
I got up, my eyes streaming tears, and walked out the room. I sat in the corridor, trying to calm myself down. I was a nervous wreck lately, anything made me cry. What had happened to me?
Inside, Tegan and the sub were having a loud argument. People from other classes were trying to look inside to see what was going on.
‘Sir, why would I make something up like that? Ami left the room, crying. Gee I wonder why? Cody was her best friend, and you’re too stupid to realize that I’m not’ she swore loudly’lying and I’m telling the truth, and that he really did die!’
‘Get to the staffroom,’ the sub bellowed.’How dare you!’
‘Even ask the head teacher!’ Tegan screamed.’You dumb’ she swore once more, before leaving the room, slamming the door hard behind her.
‘What did you do that for?’ I asked through tears.
‘I don’t know.’ Tegan shrugged, then swore.’That sub was too stupid to realize that Cody was dead. Anyway, I hate him.’
’Lord, what is going on? Why did she stick up for me? Was she doing it to be nice, or was she really just looking for an opportunity to put **** on me, and on Cody? Or are you giving me an opportunity? Is this why this is happening? Because I can save Tegan? Please! Soften her heart, Lord, please make her wonder about us! Please let her come to know your love, just as I do!’
Tegan took a seat next to me.
‘You know, you didn’t have to fight like that.’
Tegan shrugged.’Nothing better to do anyway. Don’t even know why head teacher swapped classes for me. I’m not even that smart. Probably just a dumb’ she finished with the f word.
‘You swear a lot,’ I commented.’How come?’
‘Because it makes my talking more colourful?’ Tegan shrugged.’I’ve never really thought about that. But you don’t swear at all. You’re a freak of nature.’
‘I’m a freak of Jesus,’ I corrected.
‘Yeah,’ Tegan nodded.’You’re just a stupid Jesus Wannabe.’
‘One who doesn’t swear,’ I added, half smiling.
Tegan smiled back. For a moment, I thought I saw something light behind her eyes.
‘You know, you’re such a freak,’ she began. The light had gone.’Cody died for a good cause. Jesus was murdured for a good cause.’
‘I know,’ I replied, trying to hold back the tears that were about to flow.
‘Yeah, how could you know?’ Tegan demanded, becoming nasty.
‘Jesus was killed because he was sent to take the death that everybody should get. Because he loves us so much, he didn’t want us to not be his friends. So he took what we should have gotten for not being friends with him and not letting him come in our lives. And after he died, he rose.’
‘This guy, rose from the dead? What bull-’
‘No, please, hear me out. He rose, and because he rose, he beat death. Defeated death, and now we can be friends with him and go to heaven and be with him, because he defeated the second death.’
‘Oh, so now we die more than once?’
‘Body, and spiritual. When you’re body dies, if God hasn’t made your spirit alive, then that dies too.’
‘What’s the’ she swore point in that if it wasn’t alive in the first place?’
The sub burst out the room. ‘What are you doing here? I sent you to the staff room! You,’ he snapped, pointing to me. ‘Get inside now, unless you want to join her.’