Induction of the Black Rocket

[Blackjack Gabbiani]

"He was always the popular one..." the boy started. "Always so much more talented than everyone else. But I couldn't hate him, because he was so nice..."

The man sat back. "Go on."

"I don't know when it started to change. I don't think he changed. Maybe that was part of the problem; we were at the age where we were expected to change. But he stayed the same, and...and I wanted to stay the same too. I wanted to be a little kid forever like him. But I couldn't, and *he* couldn't, but he *did*..."

"You were jealous..."

"I had to be! He was the perfect little kid...but we weren't little kids any more!" The boy's voice trembled, but the man could not tell if it was from sorrow or anger. Or perhaps both.

"Tell me more."

A pause. "...I wanted to be like him. I wanted to be the perfect child like him. But I couldn't, and I got mad. I got...got so mad...that I told him I didn't want to be his friend any more. And he...God, I couldn't believe it, he just..."

"Just what?"

"He stared at me with those big eyes of his, the stupidest expression you've ever seen on his face, and he said 'I understand. I'll be here when you change your mind.' I wanted to hit him, to smack him, to let him know that I *wouldn't* change my mind! I hate him! I hate him so much...!"

The man remained silent, knowing the final revelation was coming.

"...but I want to be like him."

A nod, as the man rose from his desk. "I think that's all I need to hear. It seems you have no choice but to join the way of the Rockets."

Gary always thought a black uniform suited him.

[mr_pikachu]

That was... a little confusing. Yeah, we know Gary's talking about Ash, but has Ash joined the Rockets or not? Or was puzzlement your intent? I'll say one thing, it certainly made me look back and reread it several times. Nice touch at the end; it really completed the semi-dialogue.

btw, you can utilize effects without having to simply use asterisks, as you do on other forums. Simply use the buttons above where you type your post to produce awesome effects. It's really such a great tool for writing (http://www.pokemasters.net)! ;)

[Blackjack Gabbiani]

Yeah, this one is a bit experimental. It's based on the induction of the Black Rose duellists from Utena (hence the title of the fic), so that's why it's set up really weird...

[mistysakura]

Nice touch at the end. I like how the dialogue really conveyed Gary's emotions; there was no explanation needed at all. Thank you for showing me how important dialogue can be, if you choose to make it important. :)

Short or multi-parts?

[Blackjack Gabbiani]

*squee!*

Single part. I write *very* short stories.

Heck, not even just stories. In high school, my 'five page essays' were about two paragraphs.

[Suite Madame Blue]

Heh, this is more like a drabble - a short fic that's exactly 100 words long. I didn't take the time to count, but it's close enough. Good introspection on Gary. Your last line is great - it sums up the story very well.

[Blackjack Gabbiani]

I don't think drabbles have to be exactly 100 words, they just have to be under...500 to 700, I think.

[Suite Madame Blue]

The "official" description is exactly 100 words. Unofficially, however, I think most are a little longer, as most writers use it as a guideline and not a rule.

[Blackjack Gabbiani]

Interesting. My 'ink' story is around that length, but 100 words isn't very much when you get right down to it, and I haven't posted it on account of how short it is.

[mr_pikachu]

Note: The Line count includes breaks between paragraphs.

Pages: 1
Words: 302
Characters (no spaces): 1,248
Characters (with spaces): 1,561
Paragraphs: 13
Lines: 37

Hope that clears things up. :D