Sand through the hourglass

[ladyumbra]

Chapter 1

As a light breeze swept a few stray pieces of her raven hair into Nadia’s face, she gave a soft sigh of contentment. As far as she was concerned nothing was better than sitting on the back of Buraq, and surveying the vast landscape that was her family ranch. With the sun high over head and nary a cloud in sight, it was hot work watching the fields of grazing Mareep but it had to be done.

The land was firm dirt for about a foot, enough for a small scrub grass to grow that the fluffy white sheep Pokémon enjoyed eating it was sandy underneath and to the north side of the pasture. This made it perfect for Trapinch to dig under the fence come up from below and grab a tasty Mareep meal.

Nadia considered this cheating; it would be understandable if the Mareep felt the sand begin to sink and tried to flee and were caught but Trapinch were born with a special ability called Arena Trap that allowed them to freeze an opponent or prey. As the case may be in place only if the Mareep tried to attack, could they move and most of them they flailed. Not to mention that attacks made their fleece loose its fluffiness and degraded the quality of the wool once they were finally clipped. The more times a Mareep used their power to attack the less useful the were for wool farming and they usually didn’t taste all that great either.

On most of her days being a shepardess, there was no trace of Trapinch but when they did streak it was hard, fast and in numbers. Fortunately, they never struck at night, as they were diurnal by nature. Since the days were long Nadia often took to taking books with here to read to pass the time. Today, she sat astride Buraq reading a book on the Celtic gods and goddess while staying alert to the signs from Buraq. Since spotting an underground Trapinch was impossible for all the ranch hands that guarded any of the stock, many ranch farmers used a pokemon that was capable of sensing the menaces. Buraq, being a Rapidash, could feel the vibration in the ground when they tunneled.

Just as she was getting into the story of Bran, she was distracted by an increase of bleating in the flock. Confused since Buraq had given her no signal, she looked up and scanned the horizon nothing. No ripples in the sand, no one approaching no clouds, no bugger - wait. She spotted the culprit and with a slight squeeze of her legs she urged Buraq towards the excited flock. There in the middle of them was a Mareep standing up on its hind legs, looking very awkward as it began to tip back.

A burst of white light flashed for a second. Emerging from it was a pink sheep Pokémon turned its head this way and that, looking at its companions with slight nervousness. Taking her feet of out her stirrup, Nadia swung her left leg over Buraq and slid to the ground. An evolution, just what she didn’t need. She walked forward, shoving her way through the flock to get to it. She check the ear tag. BR8, just as she’d suspected. BR8 had had a history of starting fights with other flock members. Despite attempts to encourage it to act like a docile Mareep and just go with the flow, it had insisted on battling anything it could. Nadia just shook her head and picked the up the annoying little critter feeling a tingle under her hands.

“Looks like you were destined to be a battler mate; it’s off to the Prof for you followed by being given to some random kid. Who will probably wander off with you, taking you in uncertain danger; pitting you against God knows what traveling hither. And, you’ll have to eat poke chow and nasty stuff like that all because you had to be a rebel,” she admonished the new Flaffy.

It just grinned at her enigmatically, bleating, “Flaaaafffy”.

She rolled her eyes and began trekking back with it to Buraq, who stood waiting patiently for her. She smiled, she knew it was sort of narcissistic but she always thought that Buraq was the best looking Pokémon on the ranch. He was the greatest out of the best stallions, by the best brood mare and he was the perfect imagine of equine confirmation from nose to shoulder to barrels to rump. Nadia reached into her saddle bag and pulled out a small walkie talkie. Not that she expected to get any reception what with holding a Flaffy and being less than 20 feet from over 300 Mareep. However, one could hope and this wasn’t enough of an emergency to use a flare.

“Jazz, this is Nadia, answer.”

Nadia cringed at the static her message had contained and decided to put Flaffy down but realizing she was holding it between her ankles and knees, the last thing she needed was it getting away, disturbing the flock or trying to battle.

“Nadia, this is Jarred. What d’ya need mate?”

A giant wave of relief swept through Nadia. “Hi Jazz. We have BR8 here, who has evolved into a Flaffy…Can you send someone for him? I don’t truss- Uh oh, gotta go… incoming Trapinch.”

Nadia clicked off the walkie talkie, stuffed it back into the saddlebag and swung herself into Buraq's saddle. He pranced about agitatedly tossing his head letting her know he could feel them. She patted his neck reassuringly.

“Easy boy, easy…show me where they are,” she murmured.

Buraq tosses his head again this time toward the left. Nadia nodded and urged him to trot there; she squared him towards the incoming pokemon and patted his neck again.

“Fissure,” she commanded and braced herself, legs firmly clasped around his barrel. He reared, mane blazing showering sparks everywhere then brought his forefeet down to the ground with tremendous force. The ground beneath them shook, sending the Mareep fleeing to the far end of pasture. Nadia backed them up as the ground began to crack and pull apart, suddenly with a loud hiss like steam great mountains of sands and rock burst up from the land carrying with them several slightly bruised and disoriented Trapinch.

As the burnt orange, hard-shelled, razor-jawed Pokémon landed on the now sandy pasture, they began to scuttle towards her angry glints in their beady black eyes. This group was stubborn. Most of the time a fissure would send them off, again in search of easier prey. Obviously, food was scarce this year and it would be worth the fight for them to try their luck with her.

She tapped her foot against Buraq’s right side and slid back as he lowered his majestic head and let loose with a flamethrower from his mane, sweeping his head back and forth. The red yellow and orange flame began looking almost like a living ribbon the lashed back and forth across the Trapinch causing several to cry out in pain and other to try and dig their hard, armored bodies away from the attack. The wind then began to pick up and sand swirled about stinging Nadia’s eyes. Buraq stopped his attack, unable to aim as the sand quickly became too thick to see through. Nadia covered her face with a handkerchief she'd tied around her neck for this exact purpose and hoped that the Trapinch were using this as a retreat tactic and not a diversion.

Despite her earlier admonishment of the Flaffy, Nadia knew that not all Pokémon were docile farm creatures. She knew some Mareep which were great for battling but stubborn. Nadia had watched shows and seen plenty of footage of various Pokémon in action while she considered most to be sentient being worthy of people’s respect, so she knew that the stronger Mareep would defend the flock as much as they could as Mareep on television were strong fighters. Wild Pokémon were particularly wily and smart, so the Mareep would need to be smart enough to realize their resistance against their element.

When the sandstorm died down and Nadia could see again, there was no trace of the Trapinch. Buraq was shaking his head, trying to clear sand from his nostrils. Turning in the saddle to look at the flock, Nadia found the semi visible group to be looking fairly calm. Suddenly the sand beneath her shifted and Buraq snorted, sidestepping. However, before Nadia could order an attack, the Flaffy poked it head up and shook sand from its fleece.

“Flaaaa!” The Flaffy bleated, pointed its snout upward with some pride as it shook sand from it wildly. It only had that pride because it managed to escape authority (for once).

Nadia rolled her eyes. “Stuff it; you shoulda retreated with the rest of the flock.”

Nadia turned her attention from the Flaffy struggling to free itself from the ground to Jarred who was approaching swiftly on his Arcanine, its shaggy cream mane and orange-black fur blowing in the wind. He rode up to her and quickly looked her over before shaking his head dark blue hair that fell into his light brown eyes.

“I see you took care of everything.” Jarred commented, amused as the Flaffy wriggled around in its hole.

Nadia grinned with gleaming pride in Buraq. “Buraq showed them a thing or two. Food must be getting hard to find. They put up a decent fight.”

Jarred nodded, shaking his blue hair again as he said, “Good to know, I’ll keep the other hands informed. “ He paused to look down once again at the Flaffy, which had finally managed to free itself from its sandy prison. Its fleece was stained with brown dust as it frantically brushed the sand off. “Well, your dad sent me out to relieve you of your duty once we’d dealt with the Trapinch, so you’d best be heading in with our new friend,” he teased. The Flaffy bleated with joy when most of the evident brown in its fluffy mane of fleece had been brushed out.

Nadia sighed and dismounted, grabbing the Flaffy before it could struggle and remounted.

“See ya later Jazz,” she said before gently digging her heels into Buraq side and trotting towards the main ranch.

It was a good fifteen to twenty minute ride from that pasture to the main ranch with was normally nice but having squirming Flaffy in your arms sort of took away from your ability to focus only on the beauty of the land.

On its numerous acres, the ranch had four pastures: one for Mareep, one for Tauros, one for Miltank, and one for Ponyta, and Rapidash. There were also a large birthing barn, a milking barn and a shearing/stabling barn.

Nadia made her way to the stabling barn, and was greeted by her brother John, who smiled at her and reached his arms up for the Flaffy. Nadia leaned down and handed him the agitated electric pokemon.

John grinned. “He’s real neat, I hope he gets a nice trainer. Oh, and Mom and Dad want to see you when your done grooming Buraq.” He said, running off to clean up the Flaffy a bit more before transporting via the farms transfer machine.

Nadia dismounted, slid Buraq’s reins over his head, and began to lead him into barn. As she put Buraq in his stall and began to un-tack him, she thought about John's youthful exuberance for Pokémon and training. She figured he’d follow in their mother’s footsteps and roam the world building the ultimate team of fighting creature that would forever be his friends. Nadia personally didn’t see the appeal; not when there were vast expanses of land to be farmed here at home and Pokémon in every pasture and roaming free nearby.

Sam, her older brother, also felt the same way and he remained on the farm. He had never left in all his 19 years. Casey, her 17-year-older sister, followed the rodeo circuit doing both reining and bucking Pokémon competition. Nadia had to admit, she’d been proud to go through school known as the little sister of the only girl in the area not to have been bucked off into the stratosphere by a Meganium that had been brought to the local rodeo one year by a foreigner.

It wasn’t that she thought training was evil or anything. Nadia simply didn’t care for it. Or for most trainers which seemed to have an annoying cockiness to them; as if the fact that they stumbled blindly about in the wild, narrowly escaping disaster in all their stories made them heroes. Not a one of them would survive a day doing any hard work. In fact, they’d probably send out a Pokémon to fight every rogue animal on the ranch and scare the rest.

“I’d like to see the trainer who knows how to beat a group of Trapinch underground,”
She grumbled, digging the curry comb into Buraq’s coat as she brought all the scurf and sand to the surface. She switched to a dandy brush and began sweeping away the offending dirt.

Buraq gave no response but to give little knickers of content as Nadia brushed him, which was his favorite thing. Nadia knew that part of that was personality, as some Ponyta wanted grooming by humans over quickly. But part of it was also genetics. All equines were social by nature and grooming was sign of friendliness, a sort of you scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours thing. As if to prove her right, Buraq began nibbling gently at her shoulder.

Nadia took a step to the left moving out of range.

”Very cute, Buraq, but you know I don’t need grooming and I’m still picking your feet.”

She placed the dandy brush down and quickly went over him with a body brush before squatting. She then tapped his right fore hoof, getting a grunt. He snorted as she tapped it again and looked at her as if he couldn’t possibly lift his foot. Blowing her bangs out of her face, Nadia gave a soft sigh. He was going to be stubborn today. She reached up a bit and ran her hands down his leg, squeezing slightly until she got to the hoof, and he automatically lifted it up. She took the hoof pick and dug out the bits of dirt that got caught in the clefts of his feet when he used fissure.

Once she was finished with his grooming and his tack had been put away, Nadia filled up his water bucket and gave him a small cup of sweet feed as a treat for a job well done.

She wiped the sweat off her forehead and walked towards the main house. She wondered what her parents wanted from her; normally she didn’t see both of them at once except at meals (seeing as everyone was usually busy from dawn till dusk with chores of some sort), which reminded her that it was her job to clean the tack tonight.

Walking up the front porch steps of the large farmhouse, Nadia could see her parents sitting at the kitchen table. This couldn’t be good. She prayed that something hadn’t happened on the farm; that they hadn’t lost any stock, or…Oh gods, what if something had happened to Casey?

She opened the door, kicked off her boots, and hurried into the kitchen.

”Mom, Dad is Casey ok? Is the farm ok?” she asked nervously, pacing.

Her father grabbed her arm and put a halt to her movement

“Relax, Nadia it’s nothing so bad I promise.”

Breathing a sigh of relief Nadia sat and looked at her parents. Something told her this still wasn’t good.

”So what did you need me for? And sorry about the Flaffy, I know you were hoping not to lose too many Mareep this year.” Her father waved her concern away.

“One Flaffy isn’t the end of the world, plus, Prof Oak actually took the order this time
and left us a nice tip. Apparently some kid or another insists on starting with an electric type. As for what we need you for, I’ll let your mother explain.”

Nadia nodded, and her eyes narrowed slightly. Looking at her mother, she had sneaking suspicion she knew what this was about.

“Nadia, your father and I have decided that we want you to challenge the Chedoona circuit.” Her mothers tone was firm, and Nadia could tell they were serious. It was never good when her mother argued. Since she was born in Johto, she was a far better linguist than her father and got her point across better.

“But, but you always said I didn’t have to train if didn’t want to that I could stay on the farm like Sam forever if I wanted!”

“I know,” her mother said softly, “but we feel its necessary Blank helps run the farm and its not like you aren’t a great help, but Blank will inherit the farm someday, he never needs to leave and while I’m not saying he’d kick you off or anything, we think that’s its important you do look at other options and well experience more of life. You’re 15, Nadia, and while you're very smart, you’re not world smart; you know everything about running this ranch from the ground up and could balance our funds if we needed you to; you can write nearly honors level school work; but you don’t know a lot about how the real world works. Your father and I want you to see what it’s like out there. I know it seems like were sending you away, but it’s truly in your best interest.” There was nervous tone in her Mom’s voice and her eyes showed concern.

Nadia placed her head on the table. “I can’t,” she mumbled into the table, her tone not as firm as her mother.

“Besides, to challenge that circuit, you need well trained Pokémon that have been fighting for years. All I have are Buraq and Mantgyer.” Her mother shook her head, smiling. Despite her daughter’s resolute and firm opinion, she was wrong and no excuse would get her out of this.

”Nadia, think about Buraq, whom you’ve had for 3 years, and Mantgyer for 2. They’re both very strong.”

Nadia lifted her head a bit, pressing on with her stubbornness.

“Yeah, but Buraq is trained to battle Trapinch, Vibara, the occasion Flygon, Seviper, Arbok, Ekans and Rattata. He knows ‘bout cutting cattle not how to dodge bursts of water! He’s used to a saddle on his back and me riding him! During our fights he’d be confused and off balance, trying to relearn how to attack without my weight taken into account and he isn’t trained to use all the attack he should know by now-.“ Her mother cut her off there.

“That’s why, Nadia! That’s why you have to go, your Pokémon need to learn with you. Just because you don’t want to change, doesn’t mean you can’t change! Change is important, because every person must undergo it, whether good or bad.” Her mother exclaimed with her linguist experience.

Nadia continued, ignoring her mother’s outburst.

“I’ll admit Mantgyer would make a pretty good battle Pokémon, but I won’t go without Buraq and…and I feel I know plenty. Besides, traveling that circuit won’t teach me anything new about the world its still a part of Australia.”

Her mother narrowed her eyes, her competitive side rising. She calmed down and smiled with a strange mischievousness.

“Well,” she dragged, “My first suggestion was the Johto League in whole.”

Nadia’s eyes widened. No way was she going to Johto, but no way she would go to the Chedoona circuit either. Where was she going to go?

“Besides, like I implied loosely before, Buraq use the change in routine and it will teach the two of you knew ways to fight.”

Nadia made her decision, grudgingly saying,”Johto…Oh for the love of the legendaries…Fine, I’ll go to the Chedoona circuit. But I’m doing it against my will, and I’m coming home the minute I have all 10 of my badges.”

“Twelve,” Her father corrected, beaming at his daughter’s acceptance.

Nadia’s breath caught tightly in her throat. Twelve badges? Oh for the freaking love of Lugia…she was going to be gone that long? Her mother nodded.

”Twelve, and we expect you to capture at least another two Pokémon while you’re there, please try to see the good in this. You’re going to experience new things and new places in Australia, see pokemon in a different light and learn more about them.”

Nadia just sighed. “When do I have to go?” She disliked this, but couldn’t complain. She watched outside as John ran about freely during his break. Nadia smiled before turning her attention back to her mother.

“You leave Friday,” she said gently.

She put her head down again. Today was Tuesday. That was so little time to get ready. She watched through cracks in her arms as her mother placed some papers beside her, leaned down and kissed the top of her head then bustled off.

”Everything will be fine you’ll see,” her mother shouted as she disappeared upstairs from Nadia’s view.

Her father walked over and squeezed her shoulder. Nadia glanced away, noticing John’s disappearance and the appearance of the Mareep flock being settled in by Sam.

“That which does not kill us makes us stronger. Have faith.”

“Faith is a powerful thing. It often shuts off the rational mind,” Nadia countered with fair ease, still leaning and looking away. Sam came in, shutting the door behind him as he waved hi to Nadia and his dad. The duo waved back as Nadia’s father stared back at Nadia.

“There are 3 kinds of people: Those who make things happen, those who watch things happen, and those who wonder what happened. Which will you be?” he returned, brimming to the top with joy, as he had won.

Nadia declared truce, her tongue out in retaliation and raised her head to look at the trainer registration that she had to fill out.

Her father gave a joyful upward lip turn. Rising, he pushed his chair out and in, tapping Nadia on the shoulder as she glanced at him before staring, once again, at the Trainer Registration.

“Fill that out and I’ll take ya to town to get supplies. Oh and don’t even think about trying to fail it or else,” he half teased and walked out of the room.

Nadia just breathed out heavily and began filling out the test.

Name: Nadia Banks
Age: 15
Do you have a Professor or Ranch as a sponsor? Yes
If so, then what is their name? Highreaches ranch

True/False Questions
Circle True if you feel the sentence applies to you.
Circle False if you feel the sentence does not apply to you.
1) The test you are taking is about Pokémon. (T)/F
2) You are taking this test to become a Tamer. (T)/F
3) You know what a Pokémon is. (T)/F
4) You know what a Pokéball is. (T)/F
5) You know the difference between a Pokémon and a Pokéball. (T)/F
6) You are very insulted that we think someone like you could confuse the two. (T)/F

Fill In Question
Select a Pokémon you know the most about. Write as much as you know about it. Use of a Pokédex is strictly prohibited.

Nadia fiddled with her pencil for a moment the test went from asinine to important in a flash. With a soft lift of her lips, she began to fill in the question with everything she knew about Rapidash.

There were few other question based on type advantaged strategies and breed ability. Apparently several trainers had recently been having problems discovering several of their Pokémon were compatible and they’d ended up with eggs.

Have you acquired a Pokémon prior taking to this test? Yes.
If not, then you will be given one by the closest professor in your area.

Finished with the test, Nadia stood and went to find her father. Her stride was lackluster and her body language portrayed her mood as morose. Obviously Nadia was dreading this journey, but had no choice as she clattered upstairs.


---


In town, she dropped her test off at the local Poké-Center, waited for Nurse Joy to check it over and faked a pleasant smile as she was handed a Pokédex. She walked out of the Poké-Center, scowling at the fact that she had to act happy. Nadia quickly rushed down the street to the supply store. Her parents had given her free range on what she bought here on the stipulation that she was supplying her own money once she left. She walked up and down the aisle grabbing saddle soap, Hooflex, bug spray, sunscreen. Potions, rare candy bars. Water flasks, a tent plus a bedroll were also necessities.

Just as she was heading towards the counter with her things, Nadia passed by the outfit section that contained handkerchiefs, hats, jackets, boots and the like. A beautiful black Stetson had caught her eye. Although she had a old, brown one at home, it was getting tight around her head. Deciding it counted as gear, she grabbed it and a couple new handkerchiefs as well. Trainer or not Nadia was still an outback-bred girl.

She paid for her things and walked out of the storm just as her father was walking out of the hardware store with some stuff he’d needed to fix a fence the Tauros had damaged. The two had always had amazing timing when they shopped together and Nadia couldn’t help but beam.

The last couple of days sped by for Nadia in a flash. In no time at all, it was Friday and time to go. Giving her one last look in the mirror, Nadia was satisfied. She looked like a ranch child not a stuck-up trainer. From head to toe she was 100% stockwoman. She wore a pair of fading blue jeans, a blue t-shirt and handkerchief around her neck. Completing the ensemble was her treasured Tauros leather jacket, new, slightly loose fitting Stetson on her head and Arbok hide boots (the hide had been taken off an Arbok corpse she found in the desert). Taking one last look at her poster cover walls, stars and space bed spread, carpet, and shelves full of books she wouldn’t see again for months, Nadia steeled herself for the long journey that lay ahead of her.

She walked down the creaking wooden stairs and through the kitchen, which was pristine as always. Nadia then stepped outside where her parents and brothers were waiting for her. Buraq was already saddled and waiting, tossing his head in impatience she made her way to her mother and hugged her tightly. Although she blamed her for this escapade, she didn’t love her any less.

“I’ll make you proud” Nadia whispered. Despite her somber mood toward this journey earlier, and somewhat present now, she was pumped.

Her mother squeezed back before letting go so she could hug her younger brother. She picked John up and swirled him around. The giggling boy was put upon his feet again.

“I’ll call you all the time and write lots of letters. I promise.” Nadia vowed.

John grinned. ”Have fun! Oh, and since you’re not gonna be here I promise to watch Myths and legends for you every week!” he said solemnly.

Nadia couldn’t help but laugh in appreciation and humor.
“You’re a sport, John.”

She smiled at him and moved to Sam. He winked at her and handed her a small gift wrapped box.

“Don’t open it; unless you’re desperate of course.”

She nodded, taking this as both a joke and something serious.
“It shall be Pandora’s Box, unless I am desperate.”

The two laughed and she walked over to her father who stood holding Buraq’s reins. They stared at each other for a moment and then he reached out and pushed her Stetson down lower on her head.

“If you’re gonna wear it, wear it right,” he teased.

Nadia closed her eyes and sparked a wide grin at him.

“Whatever you say, Pa.”

Nadia grinned like the Cheshire cat, and placed Sam’s gift in the already nearly stuffed saddlebag. Then, she took the reins from her father and gracefully swung herself into the saddle. Nadia circled Buraq around her family once, and waved at them, tears forming in her eyes as they waved back. Nadia clucked softly to Buraq, gave him a little kick, began to ride away from the ranch from home and everything she knew. With a heavy heart and full of uncertainty, Nadia and Buraq galloped off into the sunrise.

[ladyumbra]

Notes: for those who recognize the battle it’s from an old fics that never quite took off.
Chapter 2

Let no one think of me

As humble or weak or passive; let them understand

I am of a different kind; dangerous to my enemies,

Loyal to my friends. To such a life glory belongs.

Maria lay on the couch staring at the TV. The indigo league championships were on and she was watching with only mild interest. It was only the first rounds for the competitors and so there was rarely any real battling but tentative feeling out what it would be like no one willing to show their best moves so early on. Still it was better than soap operas and so she watched

The water field was naturally almost all clear blue water with only a few platforms floating in its midst. The referee stood off to the side and did his little speech about how many Pokemon were allowed, that there was no time limit, and that the boy Jake a boy of around twelve, with spiky black hair and hazel eyes, from somewhere would choose first.

Jake drew a pokèball form his belt, and threw it into the field. When the red light cleared, she saw that he had released a Shellder. Its white shell gleamed with good health as it sat upon of the plat forms. Maria raised her head a bit Shellder if trained correctly could be Just as much a force to reckon with as cloister. She watched as jakes opened Rochelle whispered to her pokèball and wished the competitors had microphones not them.
The crimson outline of her choice settled into a Marowak. Its hard brown skin, shining white bone skull covering, and chest plate gave it a tough look even at a field disadvantage. At this point Maria sat up mind changed, this was going to be an interesting battle.

"Water gun!" Jake shouted.

"Bonemarang!!" Rochelle yelled at the same time.

The clam Pokemon open its shell and shot forth an exceptionally fast steam of water, while the Marowak tossed its bone high over the Shellder and water before the gleaming white object circled back. Meanwhile, the water gun hit Marowak point blank before it could move and knocked it into the water.

"Shellder, into the water!" Jake yelled.

The Pokemon hopped forwards and would have descended safely had not the Bonemarang smashed into it from behind, sending it skimming across the top of the waves until it hit another platform and fell unconscious. The bone landed safely on a platform a few feet away...

The referee held up a red flag and stated that the first match had gone to Rochelle while her opponent, Jake, recalled his unconscious Pokemon. Marowak swam to the plat form, where it's bone rested, and heaved its soggy, tired body up before assuming a battle stance.
Gnawing on her lip thoughtfully Maria had to give credit to Rochelle that was a slick move one way or another Shellder was going to get hurt if not knocked out. She smiled it looked like there were some decent trainers in Japan, maybe some day she’d get a chance to test them rather than deal with the stupid touristy ones that kept showing up. with a sigh she turned back to the screen

Jake was grinning , not even phased by his loss, and released a Starmie. It hovered in the air; it's rich purple hide showing it's good health.

"Starmie, hydro pump!" Jake commanded.

"Dodge it!” countered Rochelle.

The Starmie used three of its limbs to created a triple blast of high powered water. The Marowak leapt from his platform and landed, teetering, on the edge of another.

"Spinning tackle!" cried Jake, in a fervor now.
"Bone club!"

Starmie raced through the air on its side, a whirling dervish. The Marowak spun on one foot and tried to slam his thick bone down, but didn't quite complete the turn and only managed to get the bone ripped from its paws and spun into the crowd before the tackle hit. He went flying across the arena, before being recalled

With a flick of her wrist, Rochelle tossed another pokèball out and Maria watched as a Graveler appeared and looked around .it’s tremendous weight causing the platform to sink slightly in the water.

Jake shook his head disbelievingly.
“A rock type? On a water field?! Are you insane?!!" he managed to choke out.
Maria too was convinced she'd misjudged Rochelle and believed that the girl was nuts .

Rochelle smiled, "maybe,” was all she said.

"Solid, use defense curl!" Rochelle commanded as her Graveler tucked her arms against her body and counted down.

“Hydro pump” Jake said , seeming very smug in his command.

Again the triple beams of water shot towards one of Rochelle Pokémon, but Solid had obviously been training long enough to be able to withstand the devastating attack for at least a little while using defense curl.

Jake sighed. "Spinning tackle!”
“ are you nuts hello rock solid pokemon there tackling its going to do a hell of a lot more damage to you” Maria yelled at the tv. Honestly some people maybe if Starmie had more weight was able to push the gravel into the water but common.

Rochelle yelled to her Pokemon.
"Grab it and body slam!"

Solid unfurled from her defense curl and slipped her short arms around a limb of the now spiraling Starmie, falling over on it as it slowed and strained against her iron grip. The Graveler allowed her full weight to crush down, pinning the star-like creature beneath her. The platform rocked from the impact, and a few waves lapped at the rock Pokemon’s body, but Solid didn’t move.
Jake bit his lip, "Hydro pump!” he called, half desperately.

The Starmie tired to comply but couldn’t lift its limbs. Solid didn’t move from her crushing embrace until the Starmie’s center gem began blinking, and then she stood up with a triumphant gleam in her hard eyes.

Jake sighed softly and recalled the unconscious and badly hurt Pokémon.
Maria stared intently at the screen her faith in Rochelle once again restored, this girl knew what she was doing wither pokemon even at a disadvantage.


"Go, Lapras!" Jake called out releasing the blue and cream creature. Its shell was hard looking it gave a pleasant call,

"Ice Beam!"
“Fissure!”

Solid leapt about a foot in to the air, intending to slam down on the platform and empty the pool of some water, at least that what Maria figured Rochelle was trying to do , but it never made it. The ice beam caught her on the descent and half froze the rock-type, half pushed her into the water.

Rochelle recalled the Graveler, murmuring thanks to the tired Pokemon, and the referee declared the match to Jake.

The announcers were going on about how it was down to a one on one, and how Lapras looked powerful… but would Rochelle be able to pull something out of her sleeve.

"I forfeit," she called out, shocking everyone

Maria jumped off the couch platinum ponytail swishing about emerald green eyes snapping with anger” forfeit forfeit how dare you forfeit you’re disgrace trainer everywhere after what your Pokémon just did for you, you give in an-“

bring bring bring

Maria stopped her tirade and muted the tv to pick up the phone ‘

“Hello” she said answering the phone no hint of agitation in her voice

“Maria you and kamin have been assigned to the chedoona circuit for a recruitment run” the familiar voice of Diana, her and kamin supervising officer.

“ When do we leave” she asked cheerfully it would be great to get away for a while.

“ Within the next week but as soon as possible were looking for two new blitz member and 5 new blackout members try to keep that in mind.

“Got it Dee we’ll be out of here soon, anything else

“ Yes, if on your travels you should come across any nosy rockets aqua’s or magmas restrain them is you can kill them if you cant, then report it immediately we have word that some their sending agents to scout us out we want to nip any espionage advances in the bud. That’s all" click

Maria hung up the phone and began chewing on her lip again. Rockets and magmas and aqua’s ,hmm that could be interesting. “Meh we're unlikely to see any unless they are really as stupid as portrayed don TV” she mused and walked out the living room and down the hall to the music studio where she knew she’d find kamin. Her brother loved to compose music in his off hours and often spend his weekends holed up in his studio playing and recording and fiddling with it until it sounded just right.

When she entered the studio Maria found Kamin seated on a stool, guitar across lap, his eye closed oblivious to her presence he strummed the gutter and sang
“ There’s three little words that I long to hear
Wont somebody please whisper them in my ear
I’d climb every mountain and cross every sea
Just to show you that I’m all that you need
Wont somebody please say I love you to me”
As the last words left his lips kamin opened his eyes and blushed as he caught Maria watching him in amusement.

“I didn’t hear you come in,” he murmured fidgeting

Maria grinned “ you were concentrating and stop looking so embarrassed I’ve been listening to you sing since we were little and you’d spend the whole bath belting out whatever you’d jus heard on the radio.’

Kamin laughed “ true so what brings you in here I though you were watching the indigo league battles”

Maria wrinkled her nose in disdain” I was but it got annoying and then I got a call, we're been assigned to recruitment duty in the chedoona league area.
Unslinging his guitar and setting it on the stand beside his stool kamin nodded “ when do we leave and what’re we looking for’

His posture had completly changed when he'd been playing music he’d been relaxed and happy now his voice and body signals were showing him to be tense and all business.

“ Within the week soon as possible mainly blackout members but the odd blitz one wouldn't hurt and were supposed to keep an eye out for spies from the Japanese crimes teams.

Again kamin nodded “ well leave tomorrow then, you make arrangements to get us to blank city and stat packing, I’ll grab some supplies and let the moms know.”

“ Sure “Maria agreed before turning and leaving the studio headed for the living room again to call the air port.


Kamin walked out of the other side of the studio whose door lead to the side of the house he and his twin shared, outside the sun was shining pleasantly and a salty sea breeze kept the temperature form becoming unbearable. He walked around the house to front and climbed onto his dirt bike revved the engine and began driving towards town. There were laws that said you had to wear helmets, but the only people who listened to that where those who competed in races and the officials made them so as the cobalt colored machine raced down the road kamin the wind wash over his face and pull his platinum ponytail out behind him like a streamer.

After a few moment he slowed and pulled into the driveway of Cindy and karlee's seaside resort and pokemon spa. . The large wooden building sat on a huge amount of property that allowed its customers to enjoy 9 holes of golf, horseback riding and many other activities. Inside was a beautiful dining room that boasted some of the best chef in the continent, a gym , ballroom and small gift shop. Then attached to all that was the pokemon spa where pokemon could be massaged , treated with special oils have mud baths, electro or aromatherapy ,there was also a sauna and two tanning chambers.

Kamin smiled as he entered the main lobby of the resort which was furbished with two leather couches and plush black velvet carpeting and winked at Diana who was also indecently the resorts receptionist, she had been hired only a few weeks after he and Maria had joined the babb ,to keep an eye on them and once they had earned her trust and respect she’d stayed on anyways. She smiled at him and turned to help a women who was checking out..

He turned left and walked out of the main lobby and down several hallways till he reached the smalls smaller lobby where one of his mothers karlee was sitting behind the desk filling in some papers.

“ hi mom,” she said gently so as not to spook her

karlee raised her head and smiled “ good afternoon kamin its good to see you”

He smiled back ‘good to see you too, I can’t stay long though Maria and I are headed out tomorrow we’ve decided to challenge the cheedona league so I thought I’d pick up some supplies before we left.”

Karlee nodded “ makes sense help yourself to anything you’ll need and good look, Cindy is out at the moment if she doesn’t comeback before you leave I’ll tell her what’s going on and shell call you tonight.

Kamin smiled “ thanks and I’m sure I’ll appreciate the call” he said teasingly Cindy his birth mother was just a bit obsessive compulsive when it came to him and Maria she seemed to feel the need to constantly inform them of exactly how things should be done It was always said with love and many times was things he and Maria needed to know but it did try on the nerves. Karlee just laughed and went back to her paper.

Kamin walked around the desk and past several room till eh came to the storage room, he opened the door and stepped into the cool concrete room there were shelves and shelves of more stuff than you could imagine,. Carefully he picked out a couple bottles of Oran juice, some revitalizing potions, a couple muscle relaxants, pain killers, and energy and stimulant oils. Satisfied he moved away from the liquids and took some rare candy bars, iron pills and a bag of protein mix.. assured he had everything they’d need he left the storage room and walked back out to karlee. He placed some money on the desk and kissed her forehead ‘ later” he said walking out of range before she could protest about the money.

That night the twins were finished packing and had made arrangement to fly to blank city . They figured that if they latched onto either a small group of people traveling or at least one promising trainer and traveling with hem they would find it easier to see the person strengths and weakness and weather or not they’d be useful rather than just simply following them around and approaching them after a certain amount of time.
As the night wore on and kamin lay in bed try to sleep he wondered if being sent on a recruitment run was test usually successful recruiters were promoted to abroad field agents and sent to Japan to either act as sleeper agents or recruit there. Maria on the other hand was sound asleep dreaming of travels and battles catching spies and weaving lies.

[mr_pikachu]

So three new trainers are challenging the Chedoona league, huh? Well, Nadia's background is interesting enough. It almost reminds me of Aquababe727's old fic, Rhapsody in Red. Similar settings, at least. Nadia's got a classic temper, too. Not bad. I can understand her disdain for trainers, seeing her background. It's not like that's something she could have grown to appreciate. Kamin and Maria could potentially be good characters, as well.

Again, I like the setting you've created here. Australia literally is "the outback", so it's interesting to get to see Pokemon from that point of view. Nadia's got the beginnings of a nice (not referring to temperament) character. She's got a flair already, and we can see her disposition toward training and of wanting to please her parents already conflicting. I look forward to seeing where you go with that.

Unfortunately, the second chapter was very, very difficult to read. It felt very rushed, quite frankly. Every other sentence was a lengthy run-on, combining too many thoughts into one. Here's an example:


Kamin smiled as he entered the main lobby of the resort which was furbished with two leather couches and plush black velvet carpeting and winked at Diana who was also indecently the resorts receptionist, she had been hired only a few weeks after he and Maria had joined the babb ,to keep an eye on them and once they had earned her trust and respect she’d stayed on anyways.

That's just too much information for one sentence. Don't be afraid to use short sentences if you have to. Just make sure you don't pack so much info into one sentence that your readers are overwhelmed. I literally had to read this three times to understand it. You don't want your readers to have to read sentences repeatedly just to comprehend them. Break the longer streams of thought into shorter sentences. Don't be afraid to end a sentence earlier than you'd like. Remember, it's better to break up the flow of text than to let it get out of control.


Also, I noticed that many things went unexplained. Blitz members? Blackout members? Huh? There was, quite frankly, no explanation given whatsoever for Maria and Kamin leaving all of a sudden. Or, at least, what explanation was given was too vague to understand. You can't assume that your readers are going to understand every new concept you show them instantly. Sometimes writing can be like teaching a small child, especially with fantasy fiction; you have to teach your readers about every new thing that is of any real importance. If you don't, you'll leave your readers very confused, and you risk losing them to another fic. So it's imperative that you give those readers what they need to know to understand what's going on in your new world.

You've still got time, though. You may want to edit this last chapter, if for no other reason than to fix the run-on sentences. But it shouldn't take too long to correct the run-ons; you just need to identify out-of-control sentences and break them up into manageable pieces. It also helps that your first chapter was pretty well-crafted. Just learn to manage the length of your sentences, and you'll be fine. Once that's taken care of, everything else should run a lot smoother. I'll keep reading this fic, so keep writing! And remember, every piece requires some refinement. It's the persistence at the editing process that matters. So keep working at this. You've created a great start for the plotline here; don't let it go to waste! Anyway, I'll see you next chapter!

[ladyumbra]

hurrah someone reviewed. ack i forgot that i didn't give you guys the info on the the blitz and blackour brigade. * runs off to fetch that* as for the logn sentences i'm notorius for sayign as much as possible at once. however, i'll get on fixing fixing that up soon.

[ladyumbra]

The blitz and blackout brigade is Australia's only organized crime. Its founder and first members were descends of fames criminals deported to the continent years ago. The organizations team members work in pairs, a blitz member has speedy pokemon that can deal rapid attacks or drain energy with devastating speed. While their blackout partner had pokemon that deal large amounts of damage and have the ability to make their opponent faint with only a few attacks. Interested in total world control the BABB has sleeper members all over the world investigating thins buying out other organizations and entering members into politics and influential positions.