POLL: What would Jesus do?

**RedStarWarrior** · 9th January 2008, 04:53 AM

It's pretty straight forward....what exactly would Jesus do?

I'd have him turn water into wine, personally. Of course, alcoholism does run in my family!

EDIT: I am Christian. Relax and don't get offended because this is all in good fun.

**Drago** · 9th January 2008, 05:13 AM

Resurrect himself of course, because that's like the ultimate crowd pleaser.
Jesus dies.
Crowd gasps.
Jesus comes back to life. "THANK YOU!"
The crowd goes wild!!

**Vejodi** · 9th January 2008, 05:52 AM

I want him to throw a sexy party; as history shows at sexy parties one gets sex.

**Magmar** · 9th January 2008, 06:08 AM

**Austrian ViceMaster Alex** · 9th January 2008, 07:33 AM

He'd do all of them but only if you don't ask for it. Cause I bet he's like his old man and doesn't want his powers tempted or something like that.

**Ultimate Charizard** · 9th January 2008, 08:41 AM

Nah dude, u ever wonder why the Bible goes from like childhood to adulthood and completely skips the teenage years?
Dude was out partying with the biblical version of Lindsay Lohan. He knew what kinda life he was gonna be living once he was older, cant blame a guy for enjoying himself while he can.

**Toxicity** · 9th January 2008, 06:35 PM

Originally Posted by Magmar

It returns!

Jesus would probably resurrect himself just to make an appearance before kicking in some heretic ass and then chill with the people who he sees as most deserving of his company. At least, in this day and age he probably would.

**Heald** · 9th January 2008, 08:54 AM

Die for my sins. Someone has to. Otherwise I'm fucked.

**Blademaster** · 9th January 2008, 09:36 PM

He'd die for our sins, then ressurect himself and throw a sexy party where he'd turn water into wine and pass out an endless supply of $1 bills to us that we could give to the strippers.

**firepokemon** · 10th January 2008, 05:37 PM

What would Jesus do?

Jesus is a virtual existence and thus I do not believe in him but if he was to be real I'd have him connect my brain to the internet so I can control it.

**Vejodi** · 11th January 2008, 06:02 AM

So that's how Al Gore did it.

**Zak** · 11th January 2008, 06:54 AM

Is this "What would Jesus do" or "What would you want Jesus to do". Based on Scott's answer I will assume the latter.

I'm not Christian, but I voted turn water into wine because that'd probably be what I'd desire most, and I didn't wanna be cliche and vote for the nonsequitor.

**Inferno_Dragon** · 11th January 2008, 11:11 AM

I am not an alcoholic but turning water into wine is a pretty wonderful skill to have so that's why I voted for that one.

**Crystal Mew** · 11th January 2008, 11:39 AM

I say, die for my sins. but wait, He already did that :p

actually I think he did everything already except throw a sexy party

**Magmar** · 11th January 2008, 05:28 PM

Originally Posted by Crystal Mew

actually I think he did everything already except throw a sexy party

Wasn't that the last supper?

**Toxicity** · 11th January 2008, 06:08 PM

Yeah, The Last Supper was a sexy party that apparently involved the playing of Halo 3.

It's still said that Judas was a huge fan of teamkilling.

**Heald** · 11th January 2008, 06:21 PM

Originally Posted by Toxicity

Yeah, The Last Supper was a sexy party that apparently involved the playing of Halo 3.

It's still said that Judas was a huge fan of teamkilling.

If PA said it, IT'S THE TRUTH!

**Crystal Mew** · 11th January 2008, 06:36 PM

Well I guess if you count the last supper a sexy party, then sure! lol.

**Zak** · 15th January 2008, 03:51 AM

Originally Posted by Crystal Mew

Well I guess if you count the last supper a sexy party, then sure! lol.

The last supper was actually a passover seder which nowadays can sometimes be a "sexy party".

I don't think his was, though. Heh

**Toxicity** · 15th January 2008, 04:33 PM

Originally Posted by Zak

I don't think his was, though. Heh

Sacri-licious bondage?

**Magmar** · 11th January 2008, 09:29 PM

**Blademaster** · 11th January 2008, 10:45 PM

Every one of us that posted in this topic is going to Hell.

**Inferno_Dragon** · 11th January 2008, 10:52 PM

Why everyone one of us? Maybe those who didn't go too far won't. I mean I just stated my opinion and didn't go that far.

**Crystal Mew** · 15th January 2008, 02:21 AM

I'm not going to hell for posting in this topic, what are you talking about

**Magmar** · 15th January 2008, 09:15 AM

I've been to some sexy passover seders. Although Purim tends to be a little more... festive...

**Blademaster** · 15th January 2008, 04:34 PM

Some people just can't take a joke...

**RedStarWarrior** · 16th January 2008, 11:40 AM

I should have added an 'All of the Above' option...damn it!

**AntiAsh Superstar** · 10th February 2008, 06:57 PM

I'm only posting in this topic in the hope of going to hell, it seems a lot more fun.

**Blademaster** · 11th February 2008, 03:58 PM

Welcome, brother!

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