Warning: The following contains randomness, clichés and the torture of characters. If you don’t like such things, find a more serious RPG. If you enjoy such things, get your head examined, or better yet, sign up for this thing!


A Mystic_clown and Alisynne production…


It Sucks to be Us!


It started out like a normal day at <yet to be named> apartments (look, we couldn’t think of a name ok? Don’t you judge me!!). Anyway, it started out like a normal day (well, as normal as these guys could get). Suddenly, out of nowhere, the ground began to shake, like a freak earthquake or something, which rocked the whole building. Lightning fell all over the place (yet for some bizarre reason, noone was hit) and the sky went from blue, to green, to red, to various shades of purple (ooo, pretty).

Then there was flash of light (don’t forget your shades), and the place was rubble.

Thankfully, the residents that lived there survived (if they didn’t, you could kiss this RPG goodbye!). They were confused, hurting and wondering who the hell to blame for leveling the place. Thankfully, before any finger pointing and fighting can begin, their attention was caught by a strange old man who appeared out of almost nowhere.

“I suppose you’re all wondering what just happened right?”

Wanting to know who to blame for all this, they nodded.

“Well, as you all know, this world is divided into different versions of itself called “genres”, each contained by a barrier right?”

Being from different genre’s themselves, they all nod.

“Well, an evil group calling themselves “The Council” (because they couldn’t think of a cooler name) have broken the barriers, causing the different genres to pour into each other like so much cheap liquor.”

Everyone gasps.

“It seems they’re after an artifact known as the Gem of Incredible-But Never-Really-Explained-Powers, an extremely powerful gem. I could tell you what it does, but I don’t have the time.”

“Why are they doing this?” One of them asks.

“Well…because we really needed a plot for this RPG.”

“…”

“Anyway. It’s up to you to stop them. You must foil their plans and get the Gem of Incredible-But Never-Really-Explained-Powers before they do.”

“But, why us?”

“Well duh, the rest of the plot focused on you so far hasn’t it? You’re the bloody main characters!”

“And if we refuse.”

“Don’t you get it? You don’t have a choice! You’re slaves to the story! You’re going on this bloody quest whether you like it or not! MWAHAHAHA!!”

The man couldn’t help noticing he strange looks he was getting and immediately stopped laughing evilly.

“Anyway, you must be going, and so must I.”

“Wait! Aren’t you coming with us?”

“No. I’m not a main character, and my role in this thing ends here. See ya!”

In a puff of smoke, he was gone, leaving our ‘heroes’ standing in the ruins of their home. Will they do what the old man said and go on their quest? Of course they will! As the old dude said, they don’t have a choice!

Ok, just so I can make it clear to you guys, this is a parody, but it’s a parody of RPGs as a whole, so feel free to bring in (and poke fun at) clichéd events, torture your characters, get yourself involved, etc. Overall, have fun! However, there’s one little rule about this RPG, your character must belong to a certain genre, whether it’s romance, horror, fantasy, etc. Please pick one from the list below, or make one of your own.

~Drama (TAKEN - Hinata)
~Action (TAKEN - Kuro Espeon)
~Adventure (RESERVED - Crazy Elf Boy)
~Comedy (TAKEN - Blademaster)
~Romance (TAKEN - Houndoom_Lover)
~Gothic (TAKEN - Shizo)
~Fantasy (TAKEN - Crystal Tears)
~Survival (TAKEN – Alisynne)
~Sci-Fi (TAKEN - Inferno_Dragon)
~Horror (TAKEN – Mystic_clown)
~Espionage (TAKEN – Master Rudy)
~School (TAKEN - Arnen)

If you wanna join now, you have to make up your own genre (and for hte love of all things holy, not erotica!)

Now, onto the sign ups!

Name: (Obviously what your character is called, make it fit the genre even if its in a ridiculous way. Adds to the fun ^-~)
Age: (how old is your character, again, fit it to the genre)
Gender: (duh)
Species: (its possible we all wont be humans so what species?)
Personality: (how your character behaves and what goes on in their head)
History: (How you character got to where they are now, important things in their life etc.)
Physical Appearance: (what your character looks like)
Typical clothes: (what do they usually wear day to day?)
Genre: (What genre are they from? choose one from the list or make up your own)
Weapon/Gear: (What your character uses to fight, and the items they have with them)
Catchphrase: (optional, if your char has a stereotypical thing they like to say it goes here)
Other: (you know what to do surely)

Now, for mine.

Name: Jack Scarecrow
Age: He’s about 56, but looks like he’s in his early twenties.
Gender: Male
Species: Corpse/Scarecrow (he’s a corpse made up of different body parts stuffed with straw).
Personality: He’s not exactly quite right in the head. At one time, he seems like a normal person, a bit of a smart ass and any attempt he makes at coming off as scary end up as being lame. On the other hand, he can go completely insane and homicidal on your ass. It’s these times he can be considered scary. When he’s ‘sane’, he’s normally a nice guy/scarecrow/zombie/whatever!
History: He was built from old body parts by a mad scientist to act as a scarecrow for his garden. However, it wasn’t long before he got bored with scaring crows and began wanting to scare the nearby villagers as well. He always had a dream of being a famous horror monster, like Dracula or Frankenstein, but unfortunately his attempts as being scary only came off as annoying, up to the point where his mad scientist father kicked him out. He’s been wandering around ever since, trying to scare people (and getting chased out) until he found residence at the <yet to be named> apartments. He managed to get a job at a supermarket, but has recently been laid off.
Physical Appearance: Standing at about 6 foot, Jack’s pretty much made up off different body parts from other corpses (as mentioned two previous times in this sign up form). His skin’s deathly pale, going on gray and while on eye is a dull green, the other’s a dull blue (they were from different bodies). His dirty blonde hair resembles straw, and speaking of straw, large numbers of it are poking our through his stitches. Despite being an undead/scarecrow thingy, he’s quite handsome.
Typical clothes: He wears the same clothing he got on the day of his ‘birth’, a dirty white shirt, and old brown jacket and old gray pants with a few tears in it. He also wears brown boots, old white glove sand a crooked gray steeple hat. He also managed to get hold of a red scarf.
Genre: Horror
Weapon/Gear: His main weapon is the cross he hung from, which is mainly two logs tied into the shape of a cross. All four ends are sharpened to a point, so it’s very good for stabbing and such.

He also carries around and extra bag of hay and a ball of thread and a needle. You never know when you need to replace some stuffing or stitches.
Catchphrase: You wanna know why we’re called SCAREcrows? (yeah, I know, it’s supposed to be lame).
Other: He’s friends with Jane.

Jack Scarecrow
----------------------------------
Jack sighed as he slowly walked into the lobby of the <yet to be named> apartment building, his wooden cross (which he carried around with him everywhere) hung over his shoulder.

He headed up the stairs to his floor, the massive cross not seeming to weigh him down or anything. He let out a small sigh as he reached the top.

The was a twang, and Jack tilted his head to the side.

And arrow buried itself in the wall behind him.

“It’s only me Jane.”

The blonde survival nut lowered her crudely made bow with a small relieved expression on her face.

“Sorry about that,” she said. Whether she really meant it or not, Jack wasn’t sure.

“It’s ok,” he sighed. Jane noticed something was wrong.

“What’s wrong with you?” she asked.

“The bloody store laid me off.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.” Once again, Jack wasn’t sure if she was sincere.

“Me too,” he sighed, “I mean, look at me! I had a dream of being up there with all the horror legends! Dracula, Freddy Kruger, The Wolf Man! Now look at me! Working as a check out chick, and I can’t even get that right!”

-----FLASHBACK!------

“Ok, and that’ll be $60.75 miss”

The woman handed Jack the money. Jack grabbed the bag of groceries and was about to hand it to her…

…when the stitches in his wrist gave out, and the groceries went all over the floor.

The woman looked down at the smashed items and then glared at the now handless Jack, who was grinning sheepishly.

“he he…oops?”

------ok, back to the present-----

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Jane responded, not really paying attention, “By the way, did you see that animal, man creature around here?”

“You mean Terone? Nope.”

“Ok then.” And with that, Jane ran off, spear in hand in search of her target. Jack just sighed and headed back to his room.


Ok folks, we’re starting out before the apartments get leveled. Just go about your daily business, interact a bit and if you need to go to the bathroom, do it now! Either men or Allisyne will kick of the disaster.