SilverMachop: Thanks for understanding the unusual. At first I thought it was a tad risky, but then I thought back to chapter 14. If Tony can encounter zombies, why not aliens as well?
E_Eevee: Thank you! Oh, and considering Tony and James, perhaps its best that that word not be said...
burakkichu: Good to see you're back! I'm always worried perhaps I had made people leave in disgust... ^^;

I'm finding that the 'nome Dome is taking a lot longer than I intended, so I believe its time to return to the battles!

Minty Thrill
Chapter 19
Klepone the Bone Bird

I stepped forward, a proud, confident look on my face. There was no stopping me now.
I looked down at Leaves, who looked back at me and nodded.
I took a deep breath.
“Well, here it is…” I said quietly, “Of all the hardships… of all the struggles, I was always sure that we could never avoid this… Leaves, now is the time… the time to do it…”
I gazed at the large wooden door.
“Well here it is.” I repeated, a little shakily, “The moment of truth… The… the…”
Suddenly I snapped like a twig.
“I can’t do it!!!!!” I bellowed, galloping down the hall like a donkey that had just been taken out of a blender.
“Saaaaaaaur!” Leaves snapped behind me, frustrated.
“No!” I whined, “I don’t care if it’s for the good of being a trainer…

I AM NOT GETTING THAT NEEDLE!!”

Leaves groaned, and flopped onto the floor. Being that the tournament was almost over, the ‘nome Dome was regulated to test the blood of the competitors and their Pokémon for various performance-enhancing drugs. Well, either that, or they just needed some blood for a vampire feast. Whichever worked.

“I’ll only do it…” I whimpered, rocking back and forth on the floor, “If I’m told to do so by Pee-Wee Herman…”
“…Saur…” Leaves nodded.
“Blackadder…” I continued.
“…Bulba…” he said, looking over his shoulder.
I pondered for a moment. “And Uncle Buck!” I shouted.
“Buuuuuuuulb!” Leaves groaned, and collapsed.
“So close!” Paul Reubens muttered as he walked past.
“Typical of this bloody twit to request the encouragement of a corpse…” Rowan Atkinson spat from behind him.

“So all in all, I ain’t doing it!” I sneered triumphantly, “It would take the most brilliant of methods to shatter THESE nerves of steel!”
Leaves tilted his head slightly, and stared at me.
“Yup…” I grumbled, “Nerves of steel…”
Leaves continued to stare.
I cleared my throat, and looked around the room.
Leaves continued to stare.
I whistled, twiddled my thumbs, and scratched the back of my head.
Leaves continued to stare.
“Alright!” I snapped, and walked towards the doorway, “So maybe they were nerves of aluminium…”

I took one big breath, and threw the door open.
“Stab me now, Herr schlechter Doktor Mann!!” I bellowed, in terms that sounded all too kinky. Not often I called someone a ‘gentleman man’.
“Oh yes! Yes! …Yes!” a weak, shrew-like voice responded.
I looked around to find who it belonged to, before my eyes finally fell upon a short, bald man. He looked to be at least fifty, and had a toothy grin. Well, toothless, actually. I oftentimes pondered how it was people like this became doctors…
“I’m, sort of, like, here for my needle Dr…” I paused, as I couldn’t for the life of me find his nametag.
“Shlocter.” He finished, smiling as though he found pleasure in his own name.
“Ah, nice to meet you doc.” I said politely.
“More than nice, I should think!” he gasped, “I’m a hero, you know!”
“…A superhero, perchance?” I muttered. He quickly slapped me across the face.
“No you foolish child, a war hero!” he spat.
I rubbed my cheek, annoyed. “I see. And which war would this be?”
He paused for a moment. “ALL OF THEM!” he suddenly roared.
“I see…” I frowned, “Rather than continue this conversation, could I possibly get my needle now?”
He struck me across the face again.
“Yeah, sure.” He muttered, then slapped me once again.
“What was that for?” I snapped.
“To make sure I didn’t miss the first time.” He replied, and walked over to a counter.
“Alright then, lad…” he said slowly, hunched over, “Tell me, what comes before four?”
I frowned. “Three?”
“Two, one!” he screeched, then span around, and thrusted the needle down at lightning speed.
“Ahahahahaaaa!” he cackled, twisting the medical implement about, “How do you like that, kid?”
“I don’t like it very much…” I yawned, “But I’m sure the table likes it even less. …You missed.”
“Oh damn.” He muttered, “Well, when at first you don’t succeed… I’ll just stick it where I know I won’t miss.”

Before I could question this theory, he crammed the needle into my mouth.
Tears welled in my eyes as I bit down to avoid being pierced, before he finally pressed it down.
“Huh.” I said, licking around my mouth, “Didn’t feel much. What was that?”
“A little formula called O2!” he grinned, as I walked out.
“Bulba?” Leaves shouted, and walked up to me.
“Went fine.” I said with a smile, “Got this doctor who reeeeeeeeaally seemed to know what he was doing…”
Suddenly, two burly men burst out from the room, carrying a rambling Doctor Shlocter with them.
“How was your needle, boy?” he cackled as he was dragged off, “Vairy good?”
He laughed maniacally down the hall, leaving Leaves and I to stand there.

“…Bye doc!” I shouted with a wave.

‘Anthony Chambers, your match is in seven minutes, Anthony Chambers, report to the arena NOW.’ The loud voice said once again.
“No, I don’t want to!” I whined. But the com didn’t have anything else to say. Apparently, I was just going to have to fight.
“Alrighty then…” I said confidently, and span Cubone’s Pokéball on my index finger, “Let’s fly!”
Suddenly, the ball swerved off balance, and shot off my finger, crashing through a nearby window.
“Oh jeez Cueball, you don’t have to take things so literally!” I gulped as I ran outside.
I nervously brushed off the broken glass, and picked up the ball. I released Cubone, who was unconscious and dizzy.
“Oh no!” I gasped, “I’ve knocked Cubone out!”
“Saaaaaur…” Leaves gulped.
“Strange…” I muttered, putting all my weight on one foot, “I don’t feel any more experienced… shouldn’t I have levelled up or something?”
Leaves shot an icy glare, as I returned Cubone.
“Uhh…” I whimpered, “Leaves, what’re we gonna do?”
“Saur!” Leaves shouted hopefully.
“We can’t win with a sword!” I snapped, and felt around my pocket. I slowly pulled out a new ball, and dropped it to the ground.
“Atttttuuuuuuuu!” Klepto tweeted excitedly as he was released. He flew about confidently. He looked ready for action.
“Hey, Leaves?” I said slowly, a grin spreading across my face, “What’s Klepper’s battle record?”
Leaves lifted both claws. One in a fist, one with his index claw sticking up.
“0-1?” I grinned, “Great, how can we lose?”
Leaves stared at me, uncertain what my devious plan was.
“Why, we’re going to enter Klepto in Cubone’s place!” I bubbled, “All we need is a disguise!”
I shot my hand back into my pocket, and pulled out (what else) the Weedle horn!
“Yes yes!” I cackled, and stuck the hollow horn on top of Klepto. I picked up the confused Natu, and rolled it around in the mud. Now it was brown and white. The perfect recreation of Cubone! Well, that or a mudcake. Whichever would win this battle.
“Now all we need is a secret name, so that Klepto won’t completely think he’s Cubone…” I reasoned. “Klepto…Cubone… Klepone!”
Leaves rolled his eyes, as I returned Klepone (wink, wink) to his ball.
“Let’s get battling then!” I said confidently, as I walked back inside. Just as I entered the dome, I bumped into James.
“James?” I muttered, “What’re you doing here?”
“I really don’t know… Sometimes I wonder what I’m doing anywhere in this big scary world…” James sighed, his voice trailing off.
“You came to watch my battle.” I groaned.
“Well obviously!” James snapped, “Do I seem like the kind of person who has a life?”
I groaned again as we walked into the darkened battling arena.
“Hello?” I cried, “Where is everyone?”
The lights suddenly brightened, and I found myself blinded by them.
“And so the next match in the semifinals is about to begin…” a voice boomed from nowhere. This dome seemed obsessed with booming voices. “Who will continue to the last match? And who will be conquered in a shameful defeat that will send them spiralling down the long path to failure?”
“That’d be Tony…” James chuckled to himself.
“In this corner, Terrible Tony!”
“Whoo-hoo!” I cheered, “I’m terrible!”
I paused for a moment, “Hang on, does he mean that in a good way?”
James shrugged, as the voice continued.
“And in this corner……CHASE!”
A girl sprang into view, posing as though I were supposed to be shocked.
“…Who?” James muttered.
“Beats me.” I coughed.
“What?” she snapped, “I’m the one you made the deal with, bonehead!!”
“Oh yeah, you!” I smiled, “Hi, how you doing.”
“Idiot…” Chase snarled.
“I beg to differ!” I snapped, “I can be quite clever! Look, an annoyed sigh at the dire situation…”
I sighed loudly, so that everyone could hear just how deep in thought I was. Chase looked suitably impressed, so I took in another deep breath, then let it out again. Chase lifted an eyebrow and, so not to disappoint her, I drew in another large breath. Too large, in fact. I doubled over, coughing and hacking.

“You’re quite the professional at sucking…” Chase spat, fixing her gaze toward the wall.
“Yes!” I said with a grin, “I suck!”
“Bul…” Leaves groaned, as I readied myself in battling position. I lifted the ball above my head, and took another shot at spinning it on my finger.
“Gooo…”
The ball promptly slipped, hitting me in the head.
“oowww…”
I caught it, gulped, and flicked it to the flooor.
“Go Cubone who is a Cubone and not a Natu in disguise!!” I shouted, winking madly with each syllable.
Out popped Klepone…but the Cubone disguise was nowhere to be found! The horn and the mud were completely gone!
A sweatdrop appeared on everyone’s forehead. Especially Klepone, who was sweating bullets.
“Umm…” I gulped, “Cubone, use Metronome! *gasp* Transformation! Cubone transformed into Natu!”
I frowned furiously at Klepone, “DIDN’T HE??”
“Natuuuu…” Klepone cooed nervously.
“Whatever.” Chase scoffed, “It’ll just make things easier for Ricardo!!”
The Ricardo shot out of the Pokéball. It was big, gray and lumpy.
“Ricardo?” I said with a frown, “What’s a Ricardo?”
Ricardo is…a nickname for…this Golem… you…idiot.
“That’s it!” I growled, “I’m taking away your personality!”
I flicked a switch, and the ‘dex beeped loudly.
Ricardo is…a nickname for…this Golem… you…feeble-minded person.
“That’s better.” I said triumphantly.

“Ricardo!” Chase commanded, “Start things with a quick Metronome!”
Ricardo waved his fingers, before closing his fist, then throwing a shower of coins at Klepone. Klepone cowered under his wing.
“You fiend!” I shouted, as James and Leaves began snatching up the coins.
“Klepone!” I roared, before realising that that was a secret name, “Uh, I mean Cubone…aw to hell with it, Klepone as I shall now call you, use Metronome! *cough*Psychic*cough*”

Klepone pretended to wave his wings, then shot a mental blast at the large rock.
“Ricardo!” Chase shouted, “Metronome now!”
Ricardo waved his fingers madly, before a glass wall with a brilliant blue shine appeared in front of him, blocking off the attack, and sending it back at Klepone. Klepone cawed in pain.
“Oh a wise guy, huh?” I shouted, “Klepone, do it again! Nyuk nyuk nyuk…” Klepone again launched off a Psychic blast, only to have it shot back. It smacked against Klepone at a fierce speed.
“Uhh…” I muttered, “Third time’s a charm! Try it again!”
Annoyed, Klepone launched the Psychic wave. It again bounced off, but Klepone tried something new by flying out of its range.
“Well done, Klepone!” I cried, “Well done!!”
I smiled… until I realised that the blast was now heading this way.
“Aww hölle…” I groaned.
The force sent Leaves, James and I crashing into the wall.
“What a rush!” James guffawed, before collapsing.
“Agg…” I groaned, “Klepone… use your imagination would you?”

“Now’s your chance Ricardo!” Chase squealed, “Use a Metronome to finish them off!”
Ricardo waved his fingers, then lifted his hands to the air, creating a Thunderwave that lit the room to a blinding rate.
I squinted to see the tiny bird about to be absorbed by the great big light.
“Nooo…” I whimpered, closing my eyes.

“Yes! Yes!” Chase shouted, “…Wait a minute, what the?”
I opened my eyes. It was Cubone! He was in the arena, twirling his bone on his fingers, and ready for action.
Klepone flitted away from the arena floor, and landed on my shoulder, shaking furiously.
“You did good, Klepone…” I grinned, “Uh, I mean Klepto…”
I returned Klepto to his ball, and snatched out Cubone’s walkman. I put it down, turned it up, and watched on, ready for Cubone to clean house.

Ricardo approached Cubone and…fell asleep.
“Bone?” Cubone muttered, and looked toward me.
“I dunno…” I muttered, “Perhaps he wants to take a nap before fighting?”
Suddenly a huge snore echoed through the room. I covered my ears, as Cubone gritted its teeth. It’s ear piercing! And not fun to listen to either!

“Booooone!” Cubone wails, uses Metronome, and threw its bone at Ricardo. It bounced off the rock’s head, and Ricardo woke up, throwing a nightcap and teddy bear aside.
“We’ve only begun to fight…” Chase cackled.
Cubone, however, looked to be quite tired…
“So have we, Chase. So have we…” I said, determined.
“Saurba?” Leaves grunted.
“Well, no.” I snapped, “Of course I’m not serious! I just didn’t want her to know that.”

Already Cubone was beginning to pant…