The af;lkjglk;uer Chronicles

[Sike Saner]

Whee, Giddy fetish. Never in the history of the Pokémon games has there been a deeper and more inspiring character than Giddy fetish. His words of wisdom, relevant to any situation, are sometimes the only thing that keeps me going in this cold, cruel world fetish. Plus, he's super sexy fetish. I want to have his babies fetish.

And oh, how about that Pokémon Fan Club chairman fetish? Humankind has invented many a creepy character throughout history--it's a refreshing breath of fresh air to see a character like him who's not creepy at all fetish. Nope fetish. Not even creepy in the slightest fetish.

Lol fetish. XPPPP

And "Dragostea din tei" lyrics ftw fetish. XD

No, it was all when Jarl the lonely Swampert decided to wake up from his one story toaster, and say the word fetish at the end of every sentence for the rest of the day.

It's the first appearance of Jarl fetish! Or a Jarl, anyway fetish...

"Good day, Jarl!" a Makuhita with a bottle of rum surgically attached to his forehead said.

Nice image fetish. XD

"Good day to you too fetish!" Jarl replied.

Ah fetish! The first utterance of "fetish" by Jarl fetish!

A green Pikachu walked up to the lonely Swampert. "Fooigbna! Nernatn hammer tiep." it said.

"Sure, you can join me fetish." Jarl replied.

"Cacnacac foob ragitn!" the green Pikachu replied. It then turned into a piece of cheese. Girl grabbed the cheese and ate it. It tasted good.

That's what it gets for saying "cacnacnac foob ragitn" fetish. XP

Jarl continued on pointlessly.

"Pointlessly" fetish. I love that fetish. XD

A purple Jumpluff with leprosy floated over to him. He just wanted to know where the Chinto region was. But Jarl told him that no such region existed fetish. The Jumpluff then changed into a Mawile, who then fell apart. The Mawile's arm, however, decided to crawl around and follow Jarl on his pointless quest to nowhere. But then it fell apart.

Lol at all the falling apart fetish. XD

Mt. Mountain

Best mountain name EVER fetish. XD

So then Jarl decided to watch Jarl through Girl, who had assumed the properties of the crystal Pez dispenser for some reason.

"For some reason" is the best reason fetish. XP

"Aah, this is boring. What else is on?" Jarl said to himself. He then grabbed his remote control and changed the channel on Girl. He was now watching Fox.

"You are watching Fox!" came the response from Girl.

"I AM WATCHING FOX" Jarl said, hypnotized.

I AM WATCHING FOX FETISH... *____*

"Would you like to hear my story?" Giddy asked. A box containing two options appeared in front of Jarl. He chose "no" and added fetish at the end of it.

It'd be awesome if the games really did allow us to add "fetish" to the end of all our responses and choices fetish.

"Lunatone is so sunny. Don't you agree?" Giddy continued.

Giddy, irresponsible JERK that he is, still doesn't realize that with that statement, he very nearly destroyed the world, and in fact did succeed in destroying the majority of Orre's wild Pokémon population fetish. Now you know the truth behind that fetish.

"Wouldn't it be nice to float away on a cloud of bubbles?" Giddy asked.

"No, it wouldn't fetish." Jarl replied. Giddy then turned into a piece of cheese. No, actually, he didn't, but Jarl wished he did.

Giddy did deserve to turn into a piece of cheese and be subsequently eaten, dammit fetish. XD I mean, wtf, "float away on a cloud of bubbles" fetish? O___o; XD

"That's all, I think. We should chat sometime!" Giddy said to Jarl.

"Oh, no we shouldn't fetish." Jarl replied, pulling out a bazooka from his pocket... oh wait, he doesn't have one. So then he pulled one out of the place which all cartoon characters pull out things they obviously couldn't have been carrying, and blew Giddy to smithereens. The smithereens turned into pieces of cheese. Girl grabbed the cheese and ate it. It tasted good.

Yay fetish!

So then Jarl grabbed his backup Pez dispenser, then wondered why he hadn't thought of that before. He then noticed that it was an ordinary Pez dispenser, and then he knew why he hadn't thought of that before.

Lol fetish. XD

So then the evil sorcerer decided he would kill all the people named Jarl. Girl said, "oh, no you shouldn't, because that might lead to this story actually having a plot."

"Aah, good point," Jarl replied, and then went on watching Fox anyways.

Aye, we musn't even consider having an actual plot fetish! XP

Jarl then walked on to the neighboring Vermilion City. What's that? Vermilion City is not anywhere near Mauville? Well, screw you. I'll have Jarl walk to neighboring Gateon Port if I feel like it.

XDDDD Such flawless geography fetish. XP

The sky was a refreshing blue and the sea breeze... yada yada yada, descriptions are boring.

Indeed they are fetish. XP

"What's going on fetish?" Jarl said to the levitating Snorlax.

"Oh, the city is having its cheese festival." The Snorlax replied. "Would you like to come?"

"No thanks, I have nowhere to go to fetish." Jarl replied.

...He declined to go with them because he had nowhere to go fetish? XD I love that fetish.

"Nibber te bloop." The Ponyta then spoke to Jarl. "Foop na na na na."

"Jibberten hee fwop fetish!" Jarl then replied.

"Booter ne neefen gispergen." The Ponyta commented.

"Hoor schlepterheff nibble hooden fetish." Jarl responded swiftly.

"No. Nibberkeep." Ponyta replied, offended.

"Keeberesh oochlaten fetish." Jarl said apologetically.

"Nibberesh he feww blotten slammerte hooooooooo." Ponyta scolded.

"Ribby no hatten fetish." Jarl corrected.

"Flipper nich hop." The Ponyta replied, then clootened away with the Machoke on its heepen.

Anyone who wants to learn a new language need only turn to this story fetish. Hopefully the language they want to learn is pure spam fetish. XP

...And "clootening" with someone on your "heepen" sounds so frelling wrong fetish. XD

Heeter no hooper hoffen gleesh. Nein Giblooten Foop eht neirach feww terne. Neht nok footer bob. Bild threeten focklestein 7. Fon Achtensto ere nnob slooten eht. Art rech nof sctook. Tee nee no nuuk. Fleeter fleeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. No foop te na ha ha. Chia sho poot. Leeber loober lederhosen. Siecht blacken blooten blot. Foobern te hoop. Serecht no flibbertehoffenhoofengabberhop Nuzleaf Chinchou Articuno. Niblor marklar jello blee tee no fu. Jente nip te hot no. Yo quiero Taco Bell. Logna foloop fleeker ne te ha a oh. Chibber klee fleb no te ble nofoo u glabberhoffen mark. Zzzzzzzzzzz...

Oh, well now the whole story makes perfect sense now, and so does life fetish. XP

Jarl continued on through Vermilion City, stopping at the Pokémon Fan club. Why? Because he felt like it. Okay, so anyways, he walked in. The fan club chairman was sitting at the end of the table. "Hey, would you like to hear about my favorite Rapidash?" he asked Jarl.

"No fetish."

"My favorite Rapidash... so cute... cuddly... hug it when warm... so smart..."

I strongly suspect that the ellipses represent very naughty things that were omitted so that the game could be "E for Everyone" fetish... XP

"Dammit, now I'll never know what he was going to give me fetish." Jarl replied. He then set off on a quest to figure out what the fan club president was going to give him. But then one of the people at the fan club quickly realized that it would lead to this story actually having a plot

And, as we'll recall, a plot = bad fetish. Bad fetish!

"Dude. It was a bike voucher. Don't you remember Red Version?"

"I didn't exist at that time fetish." Jarl replied.

"Oh, right. Sorry, I forgot. You're a 3rd generation Pokémon." The fan club guy resigned.

Yeah, you fan club dumbass, he's 3rd-gen fetish. Duhhhhh fetish. >>;

He made two quick stops in Cherrygrove City, then on to New York, Paris, and Midgar, which all neighbored Vermilion because I say so.

...Okay, now I'm not sure whether "for no reason" is the best reason or "because I say so" is the best reason fetish. o_o;

And also because I've never been to Africa.

Actually, forget both of those fetish. THAT is the best reason fetish. XPPPP

Jarl then decided to stop at Hyrule, which was just off the 101 freeway connecting Tokyo to Sweden.

That is very extremely true fetish.

I like cheese. Did you know that?

THE END. Yes, really the end.

Because once you've stated that you like cheese, what else is there to say, really fetish? X3