-
12th June 2003, 06:17 AM
#1

Elite Trainer
The Meaning and the Way
This a a great fic, with an original idea. Come to think of it, I've never seen religion as a major topic in any fic on TPM, much less a Pokemon one.
It's alright about the postponed chapters, I once didn't post a new chapter for 3 weeks. No one got mad or anything.
I think that what would make this fic just a bit better (hi Shadow Trainer Ash) would be if you shortened most of the stuff about the Pokemon world other than the religion. After all, it's all right to assume that the average TPMer has some sort of knowledge about Pokemon. I don't mean that you shouldn't describe Pokemon at all, but too much at once, especially in the first chapter, can turn readers off.
I love Si's personality. He's a well-thought-out character, unlike some perfect heroes I have met, eg. when I put my characters up against yours, they're so unoriginal. I think that it was a very good accomplishment how you've already developed a lot of personality and uniquety into Si, and it's only the first chapter.
By the way, I don't think we delete threads here, at least not days after a new post.
Keep up the good work, and don't give up!
mistysakura
2007 Golden Pens: Co-winner of Best Poem (Rain Eternal) and Best Reviewer
2007 Silver Pencils: Winner of Best Poem (Death Sonnet -- Untitled)
2004 Silver Pencils: Winner of Nicest Fanficcer & Least Likely Couple (with PancaKe)
Former 3-time winner of Most Dedicated Reader at the Fanfiction Forums
Also Keeper of the 'A'ctivator Unown
Brimstone Diamonds. The Artist. Tightrope. Solitude. Autopsy.
Glitter (one-shot).
Listen to
Rain Eternal -- a song.
Random thought: 2+2=5.
Posting Permissions
- You may not post new threads
- You may not post replies
- You may not post attachments
- You may not edit your posts
-