Well, believe it or not, I didn't see too many grammatical errors, though I have to ask - what's a pokerus? I'm guessing it's like a virus, but I don't know everything about it. Could you please explain?

Anyway, here's a list of the things I did find:


“We still don’t have a penny for boats, and this is the best kind of ocean transportation we have.”

Shouldn’t it be, “so this is the best kind…”?


“Your right, Pikachu,”

*sigh* …“You’re right, Pikachu,” is correct… someone needs to learn their homonyms…



Wow... short list... Well, I have a few other quotes I wanted to comment on as well...


“My PokeDex!” Ash exclaimed, “I can’t find my PokeDex; it’s not in here!”

Leave it to Ash to be worried about a hunk of metal when the world’s only Poke-clone is in trouble!


“I KNOW HOW TO SPEAK THE QUEEN’S ENGLISH!”

Huh… so Jessie’s from England? Is the rest of the crime trio from there, too?


Pikachu was right: everything Ash had done since his journey started was straight from his own heart; he never tried to do what everyone else was doing (and when he did, it always turned out to be a disaster).

*giggle* Yep, typical Ash, all right… *chuckle*


“Brotha’, why do dese tings always happen ta us?” Meowth moaned.

“If it’s bad luck,” James replied, “it couldn’t have been from you; you’re not even black.”

Heh, for a second, I thought James was a racist! Scumbag!



Anyway, no, this chapter wasn't too short. I thought you did a fine job with it, though I don't know how they'll treat the "pokerus". Anyway, nice job! I'm still finishing up my next chapter, since I had next to no time last weekend to work on it... *shrugs* Hey, I have a life, and it unfortunately gets in the way of my writing. It stinks. Anyway, I await your next brilliant chapter!


EDIT: Shh! Delete that NOW, cc18! Don't give away my fic to those who haven't read it yet! *pauses briefly* Really, you hated that in my fic? I wonder why? *pauses again* Edit it NOW, FOOL!