The One-Year Topic

[Blademaster]

I was gonna save this for the first of January, but I'll probably forget about it by then.

Anyway, I was just perusing through Ye Olde TPMe Archivese when I saw a few rather recent (compared to everything else) threads there. So, I figured, why not create another one? But how to do it...

Then, it hit me. Make a topic that will stay alive for a year.

So, TPM, I open the floor for you all. Keep this topic alive for one year, no matter what it takes. No matter how controversial or screwed-up it gets... Not that I need to encourage that around here, but...

Anyway, I'll start.

I got an awesome new toy for Christmas. It's called a baby.

Babies are fun toys because of their versatility: They can be punched, kicked, thrown, pushed down stairs like Slinkies, immersed in water, set on fire, electrocuted, frozen, blended, and dropped from heights exceeding a thousand feet, and they'll STILL function! For something made in America, the baby is pretty damn durable!

Babies come with many accessories, many of which are sold separately. Some of these accessories include matches, which are struck and then placed in between the baby's toes. The baby will then either begin to cry, or even more amusingly, it will attempt to remove them, only to fail due to its hilariously oversized head weighing it down, preventing its stubby arms from reaching the burn site.

Another fun accessory is the microwave, which may be expensive, but is well worth the price. Simply place the baby inside, turn the dial to 'Popcorn,' set the timer to 5 minutes, and hit Start. Results should appear within seconds. Show off this feature in front of friends or at parties for a spectacle that'll be talked about for years! Don't you wanna be the guy that everyone remembers? "Hey, remember that time that Bill put that baby in the microwave?" That, my friend, could be you! And even if you're an idiot who manages to screw up this simple trick, don't worry - at least you'll have a hearty meal once the timer hits zero! Goes great with pineapple chunks and cocktail sauce!

Don't delay, guys - if you need to get someone the perfect gift, get them the baby. They can be bought in any hospital or dumpster for only three easy payments of $19.99. Buy one today!

[Heald]

I like babies but I can't eat a whole one.

[MToolen]

So this is your plan, to keep a thread alive with baby jokes?

Hey, it could happen.

[Crystal Mew]

I love babies, they're so cute!

like this baby, I asked her what she was doing...

"I'm playing box!"


-sorry, if you want baby jokes I don't have any. but I'm glad to show how cute they can be. hahaha

[Blademaster]

So this is your plan, to keep a thread alive with baby jokes?

No. I was originally gonna post a shitload of really controversial topics ("God doesn't exist.," "Every country other than the U.S. sucks.," "The High School Musical trilogy is better than The Dark Knight.," etc., etc..) and have it go from there, but I opted for comedy instead and hoped for the best.

[Clark]

babies are cool as long as they aren't yours. once they start acting up, their parents better come take them away so i can get a new one.

[Asilynne]

babies are cool as long as they aren't yours. once they start acting up, their parents better come take them away so i can get a new one.

I second this. I thought I wanted one ASAP but after taking care of my nephew Ive decided I can wait, I can change a diaper but I cant deal with sucking snot up a rubber thing and nasty milky baby vomit >.<

But theyre cute when theyre not oozing fluids

[Master Rudy]

To quote everyone's favorite fat scottish man.....
"Baby.....the other other white meat."

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

I used to hate babies when I was 10 years old or so. I got rid of it soon, but never have been too eager to plan to get one when I'll find a girlfriend or get married. I just couldn't take the responsibility to grow up a baby, although the idea sounds somewhat fascinating. Being a teacher sure is responsibility, too, but.

Blademaster, I don't know what to think about the other topic options you mentioned. We haven't had a religion discussion for ages, but I'm just glad you didn't make one.

[Jeff]

So this is what Misc. has been reduced to. Threads about babies and puppies?

But then again, keeping a thread alive for a year does sound like fun.

[Andrew]

I hope this thread gets skanky ASAP. But, sexy skanky.

TPM, show us your most revealing pictures! Within reason!

[Master Rudy]

Here you go Andy.....skanky enough?
http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2190/...b2fe7846e2.jpg

[Andrew]

Of real people, none of this anime/cartoon crap.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Here you go Andy.....skanky enough?
http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2190/...b2fe7846e2.jpg

I was wondering...usually it's recommended to read the whole topic before replying, but do we really have to check that picture because I'm not sure if I dare...?

[Andrew]

Click and find out!....

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

I did now. Is that supposed to depict a human? Anyways, since this thread is about babies it shouldn't be difficult to turn it into a sex discussion, eh?

[Andrew]

So... Look at your date of birth... think about 9 months before that... what was going on when you were concieved? NYE Baby?

[Blademaster]

So this is what Misc. has been reduced to. Threads about babies and puppies?

If you'd like to change the topic of discussion, be my guest. This IS 'Miscellaneous,' after all.

Here's some possible options for future topics for discussion:


-What TPM's most bizarre fetishes are.
-How aliens and religion would mix.
-Fun things to do with a soldering iron.
-Reasons why you hate certain minorities.
-Potential uses for a 'One Free Murder' coupon.
-'Stupidest Person on TPM' contest.
-Most disgusting things you've ever eaten.
-What animal TPM would most like to have sex with.
-What Pokemon TPM would most like to have sex with.
-Funniest ways to kill a person.
-Best recipes for homemade explosives.


The possibilities are endless, boys and girls. All you gotta do is imagine 'em up.

[Asilynne]

Eevees are sexy.

....

>.>

[Heald]

-Best recipes for homemade explosives.

I'm pre-emptively banning this one, in case we get vanned by the Homeland Security.

[Houndoom_Lover]

What Pokemon TPM would most like to have sex with.

Gotta catch 'em all to find out!

-How aliens and religion would mix.

And quiet nicely, thank you.

[Little_Pikachu]

I'm endorsing this topic for now, as long as it doesn't turn into a spam pit. People can, and will be banned for abusing this topic, so lets' see how it goes with that in mind...

Andy, maybe Roy will share his revealing pics with you ~

[mr_pikachu]

Andy, maybe Roy will share his revealing pics with you ~

As long as we're talking about expulsion from the forum... naked Roy should really be a bannable offense.

Anyway. Since we're talking about extraterrestrials and religion, did you ever notice how close the words "alien" and "angel" are? Just swap the "l" for the "n" and change that third letter....

...Hopefully I didn't just turn half the forum into Scientologists.

[Asilynne]

Hell no, although scientology is another hot topic we can make fun of...I mean discuss XD

[Jeff]

*Points finger* Ha ha, Scientology.

Anyway, I think the whole "angels are aliens" thing actually comes from Raelism. Another entertaining off-beat religion.

[Houndoom_Lover]

Same thing with Santa and Satan! They both are red...and eat cookies!

So who really is leaving gifts under our tree....?

[Blademaster]

Figures you pansies would pick the least controversial topic.

Though just to clarify, the 'aliens mixed with religion' doesn't mean aliens are gods. It stems, rather, from the oh-so-satisfying thought I got recently of aliens being able to silence every fundie on Earth by introducing a fact-based religion that originated 800,000 years ago and totally disproves all terrestrial religions.

Oh, what a glorious day that would be...

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Anyway. Since we're talking about extraterrestrials and religion, did you ever notice how close the words "alien" and "angel" are? Just swap the "l" for the "n" and change that third letter...

Why does that remind me of Neon Genesis Evangelion, Shinji-k...mr_pikachu?

[Magmar]

god dammit, now I wish I didn't resolve to go vegetarian this year since I can't eat the damn baby. I got a crock pot for christmas though, which could make interesting recipes.

*Eats meat ravioli* Oh wait... shit! Better wait til next year.

[Andrew]

Andy, maybe Roy will share his revealing pics with you ~

I hope not

[The Blue Avenger]

-Potential uses for a 'One Free Murder' coupon.
...
-Funniest ways to kill a person.

I think you may have answered yourself.

Kill someone with a One Free Murder coupon.

[Roy Karrde]

So much Naked Roy love here.

Anyway since it is a One Year thread, why don't we seriously put down some predictions that we can look back upon a year from now. Such as where we will be in our lives, where the world will be, etc, etc.

[mr_pikachu]

Why does that remind me of Neon Genesis Evangelion, Shinji-k...mr_pikachu?

Bahaha! Nice, Mikachu. *grins*

Easy prognostication: I predict that a year from now, TPM will have it's main website back. (If we somehow don't have it done by next December, a few people had better be comatose.)

[DarkestLight]

o.O We'd better. But then again, I still need a second DS...

Umm. Serious topic answer: Hope to get INTO Grad School--money sucks and I make less now ..

Non-serious answer: Hope to god I do something spectacular with the dead baby in the corner. I mean, eye popping skullraping awesome.

[Blademaster]

Anyway since it is a One Year thread, why don't we seriously put down some predictions that we can look back upon a year from now.

Because seriousness isn't fun.

[Drago]

I predict in one year it will have been 12 months since I closed this thread.

...That would have been the greatest closed thread post ever. Must remember that one.

One year from now I intend to have made at least a minor reputation in acting - minor paid work and the like, nothing big yet.

[Jeff]

OK, I'll give it a shot.

I predict that a year from now:
-I'll be 25
-My sister will be married , again

OK, some real predictions:
-TPM will be BACK. Yes, not just back, nor Back, but BACK.
-If I go through with my New Year's resolution that my parents gave to me, I'll have a girlfriend, maybe.
-I'll finally get stated with that fic I've been working on because my inner Stewie's been pestering me about it.
-This thread will still be going.

[Crystal Mew]

In a year I'll be one year closer to graduation, hopefully have a better job, and maybe a car. thats all I'm really hoping for.

[MeLoVeGhOsTs]

Next year I'll hopefully get my driverslicense, made it to the next year and will let the whole world bask in my glory after I lead my pokemon to world domination.

And get a baby.

[Houndoom_Lover]

In one year I'll have an efficant zombie defence base, will have enough Spe-geti-os to feed all the starving countries of the united nations, being jelly beans to a New World Order, and order things of PPV.

Maybe Tropic Thunder. Or the Dark Knight.