[GAME] Twisted Wishes v.8 (LV Approved)

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, you encounter a 健 healthy 赤 red 松 pine that grows Love Hina manga instead of needles.

I wish to learn some karate.

[Fett One]

Granted. You learn how to give a karate chop

I wish weddings and funerals were cheaper.

[Shadow Wolf]

Granted! Weddings and funerals are 1 cent cheaper!

I wish every member of TPM vivits the site at least once a week!

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted. All the missing about 8,000 members return and begin to visit the site on the weekly basics. However, they aren't here of their own free will but controlled by Mikachu Yukitatsu, the one and only person responsible for making this wish true. I use my psychic powers to bring all this people around the world here and the only one to notice this is you Shadow Wolf, who brought this wish here in the first place. You start to suspect something because Fanart is filled with Naruto hentai, Miscellaneous Stuff discusses events in northern Sweden, someone says Nintendo publishes a Finnish version of Pokemon games in the Pokemon Game subforum. You hurry to Argentina to find Lady Vulpix to stop this madness and she's also under my mind control. In any case she snaps out of it then and bans me for having multiple accounts but at that point, my overwhelming mind expodes and that affects to these 8,000 people around the world by turning them into earthworms and Magikarps.

I wish my opinion was never ignored.

[Knight of Time]

Granted. People begin to turn to you for advice for a lot of things, and pretty soon, some people begin to ask about things you have no knowledge on, leaving you not knowing what to do with those questions except to go insane.

I wish I knew how much money I would have gotten if I had been able to show the Royal Canadian Mint the unique penny I got a few years ago that had tails on both sides by mistake (their mistake, of course).

[Fett One]

Granted. You discover that the penny is only worth 5 cents, which doesn't come close to covering your expenses from traveling to the mint and back again.

I wish to have an unlimited supply of money.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted but money doesn't bring happiness.

I wish I could play guitar.

[Knight of Time]

Granted. You decide to learn how to play the electric guitar, but the guitar gives you a painful electric shock each time you try to play it (if anyone here watched the Inspector Gadget episode "A Star Is Lost", Gadget didn't fare too well with playing an electric guitar, and he got a pretty nasty electric shock from it).

I wish Mikachu could learn how to draw a certain quartet of humanoid turtles (if you know what I mean, they're all named after famous painters, hint hint).

[Fett One]

Granted but he draws them so that they look like women.

I wish 3d movies cost the same as regular movies.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted. Now regular movies cost the same as 3D movies.

I wish I had Nintendo 3DS already.

[Shadow Wolf]

Granted! You aqcuire a Nintendo 3DS, but after 5 minutes of playing, the console burns from the inside, leaving you with a broken and unfixable 3DS.

I wish to be a manga producer.

[Fett One]

Granted. You get to produce 1 page in a 400 page manga series.

I wish life was like a dream.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted. It's now like a bad dream. What's worse, when you eventually wake up, there's nothing.

I wish Mikheil Saakashvili and Vladimir Putin found a peaceful conclusion.

[Blademaster]

Granted. Mikheil hands Finland over to Russia; what was once Finland becomes a weapon-testing site and everyone who lived there is relocated to glorious Mother Russia.

I wish I was the best person in the world at drawing.

[Knight of Time]

Granted. You end up becoming the best person in the world at drawing goose eggs (aka nothing).

I wish someone new would be the next person to post here.

[Fett One]

Granted but you are unable to view any of that persons posts so you have no way of knowing that that person has made a post.

I wish people were friendly to each other.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granred but now they harrass animals even more.

I wish to hear Blademaster's honest and throughout opinion on my drawing style.

[Knight of Time]

Granted. He ends up telling you that your artwork sucks, and that you should give up on it and find a new hobby.

I wish that there was a new cookie-based cereal with absolutely no nuts or peanuts hitting grocery stores local to me later this summer.

[Fett One]

Granted but since you are the only person who buys it it goes out of business rather quickly.

I wish Timothy Dalton would play a villain in an upcoming James Bond movie.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but he's a villain that gets himself killed during the first two minutes. I've just woken up at 5 o' clock Finland time!

I wish I could take part in Finnish Assembly (an event where they play video and computer games).

[Blademaster]

Granted. You're a janitor there.

I wish I had some baklava.

[Fett One]

Granted but you are allergic to the nuts used in it so you end up in the hospital.

I wish airplane food was better.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, it's so good that you will want to travel on a plane everyday and it costs all your money.

I wish the people in Finland learned something of my example and were more tolerant to foreigners.

[Blademaster]

Granted. They all become as annoying as you, resulting in you going crazy and Finland later being nuked into oblivion.

I wish I was a vampire as powerful as Alucard, from Hellsing.

[Fett One]

Granted but Knight of Time comes after you with a full spectrum flashlight and uses it to kill you.

I wish Darth Vader turned on Emperor Palpatine much sooner.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted but this brings too much change into the plot of Star Wars and Yoda is lost.

I wish for some Valentine's Day greetings.

[Knight of Time]

Granted. You get a Valentine's Day greeting from an old woman who wants to marry you for the money...and she's 100 years old and Finnish (that is, she has fins because she's a fishwoman!).

I wish Valentine's Day wasn't so boring for any of us single people on here.

[Blademaster]

Granted. Meteors hit the houses of every single person here. Thanks jerk.

I wish I had a religion devoted to me.

[Fett One]

Granted but you are the only follower.

I wish all candy was free.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted but now streets are full of people suffering from sugar intoxication. Several doctors and researchers are worried and sweets are banned.

I wish we had more of cool meteor craters here in Finland.

[Knight of Time]

Granted. More and more cool craters begin to form in Finland, the problem is, they're like ice volcanoes, with extremely cold slush in them instead of lava...as time flows, they begin to overtake major cities and towns in Finland, and your precious country gets iced.

I wish Ken Jennings would do much, much better in the next two special episodes of Jeopardy! with that special IBM computer, Watson.

[Fett One]

Granted. He does a lot better but still losses to Watson.

I wish a The Tick movies gets made.

[Blademaster]

Granted. It's made direct-to-DVD and never gains the recognition it deserves.

I wish Weasel Stomping Day was a real holiday.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted. Aslo, you have just been turned into a weasel yourself.

I wish Blademaster joined in Whack-A-TPMer v.5.

[Knight of Time]

Granted. His first victim ends up being you, and he gives you such a massive whack, that it makes you cry like a helpless baby....and I'm not talking crocodile tears, my friend, I'm talking real tears, the salty kind.

I wish all of Kenny McCormick's deaths in South Park history would make it onto a special episode of 1000 Ways to Die (next poster might want to look the show up on Wikipedia).

[Fett One]

Granted but the episode is made up entirely of clips so nothing else happens in the episode and it ends with a brand new way to kill Kenny, that involves a nuclear war head.

I wish Cartman would finally learn his lesson and start behaving.

[DivineAll]

Granted. *insert pigs flying, Satan ice skating to work, cats and dogs living together, mass hysteria, etc.*

I wish job hunting was easier.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, you are equipped with a strange device called job-hunting gun, which is said to enable you to hunt down any job. By shooting in the air, you instantly get a job application descending from heavens and you fill it up since it's really easy. The only flaw is that the job isn't well paid.

I wish all computers were super easy to use.

[Blademaster]

Granted. They all have only one button.

I wish I had a well-paying and fulfilling job close to my house.

[Knight of Time]

Granted. You end up getting a job in a violin strings factory, employed by a boss with such a tough attitude that he threatens to turn you into violin strings if you mess up on the job (ever watch the Tweety cartoon, Tweet and Sour? That's where I got this from.).

I wish there was a movie released to theatres all over Canada and the United States showing a Super Smash Bros. movie based on the Super Smash Bros. series.