Poetry Corner

[mistysakura]

Hehe, when I read the first few words, I thought your pet peeve was Aussie accents Anyway, I don't get a couple of bits, but it generally amused me. dh: I really like Fooled (probably also because I like The Prestige). I like the metaphor, as it provides a good image. The last sentence was a strong way to end the piece. For "asleep afloat", I actually liked the original version better. For me, the lack of punctuation created a flowing, ethereal quality, whereas now it's a bit more orthodox and structured. It could just be because I'm used to seeing less punctuation from you, so it stands out. I do like the change in the last line, though (I think it was different, anyway) -- it makes the piece's intention clearer.

Poetry from me will exist here shortly... I'm trying to expand on Solitude (thanks Brian for the feedback; I agree, and once I posted the thing I thought maybe I hadn't developed it enough), but the stupid middle section is resisting change. Or it decides it wants to go off on a random tangent unrelated to the rest of the poem. I'm also wrestling with another poem of mine, called 'The Princess'; the problem here is that I can't seem to decide on the tone, so it sounds a bit ridiculous at the moment. Lastly, there is 'Pavlov's Girl', and its words are complete, but I just want to arrange and record it before posting it here. Too much advertising, enough from me for now.

[mr_pikachu]

Nah, your Aussie accents are just fine. ^_^ But since some things were difficult to decipher... translation time!


Spellcheck

Do you ever use spellchecking?
It's very good for me.
Every word appears so precise,
And I look great to thee.
Since you have not tried it yourself,
You must be quite a fool.
My spellchecker makes me seem neat.
The thing is a cool tool!

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Kaunotar punatukka Maarit

(the same melody as in Sailor Moon's Moonlight Densetsu)

Kaunotar punatukka Maarit
Unessa on hän minun oma Maarit
Sekä fiksu että söpö Maarit
Nimeä tuota tuuleen kuiskaan

Kun emme suojaa todelta kiellä
Unelmat nakataan meille tiellä
Silloin mielin heti puhumaan
Pian olemme kahdestaan

Nukkumatta yöllä hukun itkuun
Sen vastauksella tavoittaa voi kuun
Nuppu nuoruuden puhkeaa
Rakkaus avaa kukkansa

MAAAAARITIN kauneudesta voimani mä saan
Jos tukkaa kehun, hän kiittää

Kaunotar punatukka Maarit....

English translation:

The beauty, red-haired Maarit
In a dream she is my Maarit
Both clever and sweet Maarit
The name I whisper in the wind

When we don't deny cover from truth
Dreams are thrown on us in the road
Then I want to talk with you
Soon will we be together

Without sleeping at night I drown in crying
Its answer can reach the moon
The bud of youth blossoms
Love opens its flower

From Maarit's beauty I get my power
If I praise her hair, she thanks (me)

The beauty, red-haired Maarit...

And then...I know they are polynomials, not polynoms, but here it is anyway:

Polynom!

I want to count the very best
Like no number was
To teach them all is my real test
Derivating in what proportion
I will never buy a Texas
My brains grew too wide
Each Polynom to understand
The paired function inside
Polynom!
It's it and me
I know it's trigonometry
Polynom!
You are my test at school
Argument we must defend!
Polynom!
A term so true
Or square imaginary
You teach me and I teach you
Polynom
Gotta teach them all!
Every expression along the way
With determination I face
I will sum them everyday
To claim my right product
Come in with me
Degree is right
There's the best angle
Paper and pen will beat teachers
It's always been MY dream!

[Gavin Luper]

Heh, gnarly poem Brian. From the title I thought the same as dh13, that it was about spoiled chicks, and then from the first line I thought the same as Ada, that it was having a go at Aussie accents like Kath and Kim, or maybe a Kiwi accent. I eventually caught on though, by taking the time to read your preface. Very original and very amusing, too, I enjoyed it.

[Weasel Overlord]

My last poem, and I think my favourite. Apparently, it made my class want to get out their old paintbrushes and apologise to them, which is always nice, I guess. ^_^
Our task was to take an object (mine was a paintbrush in a jar) and write a poem about or from it's p.o.v. It was quite fun. My paintbrush is sad.
When I wrote this, I had a preoccupation with turps. I originally wanted my poem to be something along the lines of "turps, turps, turps, turps!" only in a song format, and then I figured that it wouldn't be respectable, so here is the result.

A Retirement in Turps

Back in the day I was used.
Watercolours, emulsion, oils.
But now I sit, bemused,
Soaking in turpentine spoils.

I wonder where my bristles went,
And why I sit in this old jar.
The shiny new brush took my place,
And I sit, forlorn, abandoned,

Alone.
An eternity in turps.