[GAME] Twisted Wishes v.10 (LV Approved)

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but as you hurry to read the comic strip from the website, you're absorbed directly inside the comic strip as Brutus Thornapple, eternally hearing Rancid Veeblefester's sadistic voice.

I wish I could remember my dreams better.

[Fett One]

Granted, you gain full recall of all your dreams but lose the ability to remember what you did in real life the previous day.

I wish Microsoft didn't have so many bugs.

[Knight of Time]

Granted. Microsoft tries their best to get rid of all their bugs, but they are unsuccessful and as a result, they eventually go out of business, causing computers with Microsoft Windows to get rarer and rarer until they finally disappear.

I wish I had a life-sized gingerbread man I could take nibbles of every day until I finished eating it all.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but it's so tasty that you can't help eating it all during two days.

I wish Fett One got Super Mario Bros. 35 for his Nintendo Switch and could play it with me.

[Fett One]

Granted but I outperform you in the game so much that you end up rage quitting the game.

I wish to own a set of the Mandalorian's armor

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but it ends up being much, much too small when you receive it (as in, the size of a popsicle stick).

I wish that all jack-of-all-trades people had Jack as their first or middle name.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but now everyone who gets named Jack by their parents has to be jack-of-all-trades by force.

I wish Finnish was the world language instead of English.

[Fett One]

Granted but Finnish ends up having different dialects in each country, making it difficult for people in Finland to communicate with the rest of the world.

I wish for a live action Batman Beyond movie.

[Knight of Time]

Granted. You are asked to make and star in the movie as every single male character, in order for the movie to exist.

I wish Norm the Genie was Timmy Turner's fairy godparent again, but this time permanently taking Cosmo, Wanda, and Poof's place.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but this happens only through a brutal death of Cosmo, Wanda, and Poof which isn't suitable to a children's series.

I wish to see my favourite band Blind Guardian live.

[Fett One]

Granted, you see Blind Guardian walk pass your house from your window but they disappear before you get a chance to go outside and meet them.

I wish space aliens would come to Earth in peace and help improve our planet.

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but every house on Earth ends up having an alien move into it, causing every family who receives one to have to live by the alien's rules.

I wish every message board had its own system implemented to keep spambots at bay, much like what we have here on TPM.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but it's created by narrow-minded idiots and somehow affects also people with the Aspetger's syndrome, like me and you.

I wish I got to change a doctor.

[Fett One]

Granted, you convinced your local doctor to switch from wearing jeans to khakis.

I wish cable television was free.

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but it gives you only one channel to watch.

I wish there was a coronavirus vaccine out that would work for anyone and everyone, even if they had any kind of allergy.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted but the vaccine is Russian and people are still too scared to use it.

I wish to have Gandalf's powers.

[Fett One]

Granted you have all the powers that Gandalf had on his first day as a mage.

I wish Santa Clause would start giving presents to people of all religions.

[Knight of Time]

Granted. Santa enlists the help of each religion's equivalent of him (if applicable) in order to deliver all the presents, but doesn't receive the help, and thus ends up having to deliver them all himself, running out of presents by the time he gets to the very last religion on his list.

I wish I was good at making illusions that would play tricks on everyone's brain if looked at, except for mine.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, now everything you do is just an illusion.

I wish that every time I got a new idea, I could immediately figure out if it's a good or a bad one.

[Fett One]

Granted but this only applies to your ideas so you are powerless to help others with their ideas.

I wish Brock was a more challenging gym leader.

[Knight of Time]

Granted. The levels of his Pokemon get boosted to 100, they end up all fully evolving, and also end up getting maxed-out stats, making it virtually impossible to beat Brock without doing YEARS worth of training or using a cheat device.

I wish there was a clown club where the price for getting entry into the club would be a pie in the face from every single clown in the club.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but I still doubt I'd trust a clown (see what I did there?)

I wish I could create the most famous internet meme ever.

[Fett One]

Granted but it's also the greatest achievement of your life so you have nowhere to go from here but down.

I wish for a Captain America/Predator crossover comic (if case you don't know, Marvel Comics acquired the rights to publish Predator comics this past year).

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but the newest member of Marvel's comics division accidentally screws up the colors in the first issue, making for a colorful mess in each copy of the comic.

I wish all guns being used for a future evil use had their barrels sealed shut so that anyone intending to shoot and injure or kill someone would have the gun fail to shoot no matter how many times they tried to shoot.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but this only applies to guns, so weapons such as swords still have their effect whether or not they are used for evil.

I wish to have my own Knightmare Frame.

[Fett One]

Granted, you are given a Bandai Hobby Mechanic Collection 1/35 Model #1 Lancelot Code Geass Action Figure

I wish to own 75% of all the worlds money.

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but you end up getting counterfeit money as a result.

I wish there was a gooseberry tree with the berries resembling real geese heads like the one in the Tales of the Wizard of Oz short To Bee Or Not To Bee.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, you get sucked inside the Wizard of Oz world to witness the gooseberry tree, but can't return to the real world, not with or without any evidence you have one there.

I wish I could get inside whichever fictional world I like and also get back to the reality from there whenever I like.

[Fett One]

Granted but you can't bring anyone with you or bring back anything from the other realities so no one believes you when you tell them about this ability.

I wish the next patch for Cyberpunk 2077 fixes 100% of the bugs/glitches/etc.

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but the patch ends up taking many, many years to come out.

I wish cactus needles were as soft as animal fur.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted. Now animal fur is as sharp as cactus needles.

I wish to own a castle.

[Fett One]

Granted, you now own Castle Grayskull but you don't get to become He-Man or choose who gets to become He-Man. You also have to single-handily defend Castle Grayskull from Skeletor's daily attacks.

I wish Netflix would make a new He-Man cartoon that ties into the She-Ra cartoon.

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but it ends up tying into the original She-Ra cartoon, making Netflix wonder how to produce a cartoon with two differently animated universes.

I wish I was a little better at granting and twisting a wish (no offence Fett One; this one was a little tricky. Apologies if I didn't twist it enough).

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, your twisting abilities get a little better but the difference can only been seen with a microscope.

I wish to have my own Ghostbusters service team.

[Fett One]

Granted but since there are no ghosts, the team is a huge drain on your finances and ultimately leaves you in the poor house.

I wish to be the greatest video game player of all time.

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but some people accuse you of cheating, while others decide to randomly erase your save files from time to time.

I wish I could easily find several universal video game cases in a local store instead of needing to use the internet to purchase them.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but the cases cost so much that you have to switch places with Donald Trump to buy them.

I wish to become a war hero.

[Fett One]

Granted. You accidentally blowup your own base of operations, which kills everyone inside, thus becoming a war hero to your enemies.

I wish for a 5 day weekend.

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but on the two working days of the week you are forced to work harder. MUCH harder, that is.

I wish I was Donald Trump's private chef so I could give him a well disguised meal guaranteed to make him gassy if consumed, thus making his associates and supporters have to hold their nose when he is near them.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but as Trump's private chef, you also have to hold your nose often.

I wish to become a Viking just like my Danish ancestors.