4
Kasey came up to me at lunchtime. "You, Jesus wannabe," she yelled.
"What?"
"What the hell do you think you're playing at?" she demanded. She pushed my shoulder. "Keep your Jesus freak stuff to yourself, Bible braniac! We, don't want to know. You don't tell us, okay?" Tegan stood behind her. It was a complete reversal of the other day, where Tegan was the ringleader. Kasey looked angry, her eyes were filled with a black fire.
My friends watched on. One got up, but I waved him away with my hand.
"She was asking me, so I answered her," I replied.
Lord, I don't know what's happening, but whatever happens, turn it around and use it for good!
"Well keep it to yourself next time," Kasey informed me. "Nobody wants to hear about some stupid guy who died on the cross because he did some terrible crime. Funny lot, you are. Worship some guy who was killed for a crime."
"He died for us. Not for himself."
"That's right, you guys don' realize that they wouldn't have killed him if he didnÂ’t commit a crime!" Kasey yelled.
"They still did, because that's what he was sent here to do," I answered.
"What can I say? You know the lies off by heart."
"I know what is the truth," I answered. "You do not know what you are talking about enough to use it against me. If you want to know anything, I will tell you, but if you are just here to insult me for being a Christian, you are wasting your time. Nothing can take me apart from God, not even your insults and your slandering."
I met the ground with a hard thump, my cheek stinging. Kasey pulled back her wrist. That really hurt, I couldn't deny that. I was going to have a nice bruise in the morning. I started to get up, but Kasey kicked me down once more. Her toe dug into my side a number of times. I was winded, I needed oxygen. But Kasey wouldn't stop picking on me, wouldn't stop bashing me.
I grasped as much air as I could when she stopped.
"What do you say to that?" Kasey gloated. "Still in love with God as much? If he loves you so much, then why isn't he stopping this?"
"Because there is a greater purpose," I replied. "He is not a playground referee, he is boss of the universe, and he loves you just as much as me."
Kasey's scowl, if possible, grew darker.
Lord, may this actually affect Kasey and Tegan. Can you please soften their hearts?
I don't know if God responded straight away or not. I felt a blow to the head, and decided that I no longer needed to stay awake.
5
"Why didn't you fight back?" Tegan asked.
My head was pounding. I didn't dare open my eyes again, the flourecent lights of sick bay were just blinding. But why was Tegan in here? I opened my eyes, the bright light of the room stinging them.
"What?" I asked, drowsily. I felt like I'd been hit with a sack of bricks.
"Why didn't you fight back? I've seen you in self defense, and you're a good fighter," Tegan repeated.
"Why didn't I fight back?" I asked.
"Yeah."
"Because Jesus wouldn't have," I replied.
"What?"
"There are better things to do than fight," I told her. "And anyway, he hates it when we fight. I wasn't going to make him more upset."
"So now he hates Kasey, and he hates me because we fought with you?" Tegan asked. She sounded strange, and looked strange. I sat up, holding my head with one hand, and studied Tegan. She sat in the chair across from me, a large cut on her cheek. She held a red tissue up to it. Her eyes looked tired and worn, her black hair was messy. Her face looked sad, if that.
I was scared.
"No! Don't ever think that!" I told Tegan. "God loves you too much to hate you for having a fight! If he hated you for fighting, then he wouldn't have died for you, and because we know that he died for you, and loves you that much, then he couldn't possibly hate you! Tegan, he loves you so much. Do you ever get that feeling when you're just bursting with love for somebody, maybe a guy?"
Tegan nodded slowly.
"Well, God is like that. He's like the best friend, always bursting with love for you. And he's not about to let a fight get in between you and his love. He already sent Jesus to die for us. And Jesus took away whatever wall fighting could put between you and God. He loves you so much, Tegan. He loves you so much, and he just wants you to know that."
Tegan nodded. "What if its just for you? What if its not for everybody?" she asked.
"Because he told us so," I replied. "John three sixteen sums this up. For he so loved the world he gave his only son. Tegan, where do you live?"
"Behind the school," she replied.
"Think bigger," I told her.
"Australia?"
"Bigger."
"The world?"
"Bingo!" I exclaimed. My head gave an almighty throb, but I tried to ignore it. "He wants to be part of your world, because he died for you! He loves you, Tegan!"
"This is too heavy," Tegan replied. “I don’t know…”
“Tegan, do you know why Jesus died on the cross?” I asked gently.
“Um…” Tegan paused.
“Go on,” I pushed.
Tegan’s eyes began to well up with tears. “I can’t! It goes against everything I live for! It goes against everything! Kasey won’t be my friend, I’ll lose all of the friendships I have, I’ll lose everything!”
“Tegan, before I knew Jesus, I knew nobody. I was a loner. I wished for things that I knew I never would be able to have. Then I became friends with Cody, and it clicked. We could relate about everything. He showed me the love that Jesus had for me, and from that day on, me and Jesus were best friends. We still are. But he wants to be your best friend too. Will you let him?”
“What will Kasey think?” Tegan asked. A tear, mixed heavily with mascara and eyeliner, rolled down her cheek.
“Who knows? We can pray that God will use you to reach out to her. If she rejects you, it may be for the better in the long run. It will hurt, but being a Christian is not easy. Jesus said so himself.”
“Is that why you didn’t fight back?”
“Partly.”
My head was aching, my stomach was bunched up. Tegan was crying, God was filling her heart.
“Will you accept God, Tegan?” I asked her gently.
“I don’t know if I can…”
“What’s stopping you?” I asked once more. “Just answer, what’s stopping you, and that will be the last question, I promise.”
Tegan thought about this. Minutes passed. Finally she answered. “Nothing.”
“What do you want, Tegan?”
“I want… I want to be a Christian.”
“What does that mean?”
“I want to be Jesus’s friend?” she asked.
“Is that what you want?”
She paused, and took a deep breath. “Yes,” she shakily answered.
6
Tegan laughed, letting her natural brown hair flow down her back. She jumped around after the others, singing at the top of her lungs, at youth group. The music was loud, we were all singing and making our own miniature moshpit. Tegan sang the loudest.
Her black makeup had gone, her white face makeup had been removed. She still wore the armbands, but not as many had sharp spikes on them, and there were a lot more colours now. Her makeup consisted of some eye glitter and mascara. Her smile was broad, and showed off her teeth greatly.
She was an inspiration. She had so much to life for now.
Cody was an inspiration. Cody was gone, he wasnÂ’t coming back. It still hurt me to think about this. To think about him and remember that it used to be him running around with us. My heart was still torn for him, but God was mending it.
God used broken things. My heart was broken for Cody, TeganÂ’s heart was empty. Through CodyÂ’s death, and the deaths of many others, that had affected so many people, Tegan had been affected. She had become one of GodÂ’s children.
God would never stop loving her. North was always north, God was always going to be God, and was always going to be there.
I think Kasey saw this partially.
I think she saw something as she saw us running around for God, singing to him.
I think she saw something, but she didnÂ’t say anything.
Kasey just watched from the shadows.
The End
I am so sorry if anything in there offends anyone. I guess it was one of those things I wrote when i really wanted to express a strong opinion, and I dont know if it came out a little too strong...
**PancaKe||