GAME: Whack-a-TPMer EXTREME M.A. T_M_L

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

This is a little different from the previous versions.

The object is still to score as many whacks as possible, but this time you may whack more than one user in the same post!

You can also employ the other gamers to help you in whacks, and even without their permission!

This means the first whacker shall whack me alone, but then the second whacker may whack me, the first whacker or us both. And he can also whack the first one with my help, or whack me with the first one's help.

But remember you can whack only those who post here and only with those who post here. So no sign-ups are necessary.

I whack A; *superwhacks A and B*; *stomps A, B and C into the ground*; I use Blizzard on A and Ice Beam to B, C uses Thunder on D; A and B eat C; are all acceptable whacks.

Again, don't whack yourself. However, you can create whack twists where the persons who help you get whacked, too, towards the end of the post.

For example:

Poster A posts: A and B use Kamehamehas on C, but then A uses Kamehameha on B.

And remember the general PCG rules, among others the wait-for-two-other-persons-to-post rule. And TPM general rules, of course.

This round will last until the 121st reply, i.e. the 122nd post since there is no whack in this starter post.

If questions or suggestions, PM me.

[Master of Paradox]

The Master of Paradox thought about the possibilities for a second as he watched Mikachu from the rafters. "I wonder..." he muttered to himself. That was when he realized nobody else was playing yet.

"...hell with it."

Leaping down, he grabbed Mikachu's head, flipped into a handstand, and pulsed blue energy through it until it resembled a charquette.

Rose-style Whacked.

[Blademaster]

(smashes Paradox's and Mikachu's heads together)

Skull-cracked-whacked.

[Crazy Elf Boy]

Hurray for multiple whacks

*Runs up to Blademaster with a SOCK, YES A SOCK*

SOCK DOES BEAT CHICKEN

*Whacks Blade over the head with the dirty sock*

Now who else wants to taste the evil of my 7 year old sock.

Take this and this and this

*Whacks Mikachu, Master of Paradox with the sock*

*Foams at Mouth*

SOOOOOOOOOCCCCCKKKKKKSSSSS

[Master of Paradox]

"TEAM ATTACK!"

Master of Paradox leapt in first, energy pulsing in his hands. He aimed them at Crazy Elf Boy and shouted as blue balls of light smacked into his target.

He then leapt offscreen, and Blademaster jumped in. "I have a lot of pent-up anger!" he shouted. "I beat I Wanna Be The Guy last night and I'M STILL PISSED OFF!" His fists caught fire, and he let loose with a mighty barrage of punches.

As Crazy Elf Boy reeled, Blademaster jumped away as Mikachu jumped in. He pulled out a knife and stabbed Crazy Elf Boy with it, then pulled the blade out and gestured to its brand. "You get it?" he said. "You're FINISHED with a FINNISH knife!"

The victim merely fell over. Blademaster walked in, shook his head, and muttered, "'Finnish' knife? Good lord, Mikachu, that was bad..."

That was when the giant weight fell from the sky and landed on both men, with "Divine Intervention" written on its side.

Bad Pun-ishment Whacked.

[firepokemon]

This is my first go at this so hopefully I do it properly heres praying

------------

firepokemon was walking the evil streets of Las Angeles where many a black man, a latino man or a white man appeared drunken, homeless, a whore or something in between. Out walked one Blademaster, hopelessly drunk after engaging in solicitation with something.

firepokemon being annoyed by this site, grabs one huge baseball and whacks Blademaster.

firepokemon contined his walk down the seedy side of LA when one Crazy Elf Boy high on crack and acting like a meat head, attempted to ransack firepokemon. That was enough, and firepokemon began whacking multiple times, Crazy Elf Boy's head into oblivion.

firepokemon continued again on his journey, when a black Cadillac obviously stop by one strange person Master Of Paradox. Master of Paradox drew out a gun and attempted to shoot firepokemon. Master of Paradox hopelessly missed and firepokemon picked up one old lady as high as one old coot could be and whacked Master of Paradox.

firepokemon was really on his way, searching the streets for other people to whack, when all of a sudden appeared one man thirsty for more....

[Blademaster]

A single platform hangs suspended high above the Earth.

A spiky-haired figure in an orange shirt and blue jeans walks out onto the platform, a huge sword slung over his back.

Newcomer
BLADE

"WARNING: A CHALLENGER APPROACHES!"

On the other side of the field, a light-haired figure in a blue kimono appears.

Newcomer
MIKACHU

Blade thinks for a second, then responds:

"B."

Blade dashes at Mikachu at high speed; Mikachu has barely a chance to gasp before Blade is nose-to-nose with him. Blade draws his sword, which shifts and warps like liquid metal to form a long, whip-like chain with a spiked mace on the end. Blade spins it around himself, then lashes out, slamming Mikachu in the face with the studded ball of death and sending him flying off the platform.

KABOOM!

Blade's Morning Star-like weapon resumes sword form as a familiar siren blares...

"WARNING: A CHALLENGER APPROACHES!"

Across the arena, a shorter, green-haired fellow wielding a sock appears.

Newcomer
ELF

Again, Blade is quick to respond:

"B Side."

Blade dashes at Elf like a rocket, his sword out; like rubber, the blade stretches a good ten feet, slicing into Elf like Masamune on steroids and rocketing him up and off the stage.

KABOOM!

WARNING: A CHALLENGER APPROACHES!

Blade turns and looks at the new arrival: A tan-skinned guy in an ensemble that looks like it's flaming. In every sense of the word.

NEWCOMER
FIREPOKEMON

Blade hesitates for a moment; realizing where he is, firepokemon takes advantage of the calm and rushes Blade...

"B Up."

Blade flicks his wrist, and like a fan, his sword suddenly multiplies, new swords spinning out and around the hilt, forming a wheel. Blade seems to vanish, instantly reappearing in front of and above where he stood, swords spinning like a wheel, following a straight path about 20 degrees upward...

And right into firepokemon's face.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve swords rake firepokemon, smashing him backwards and sending him flying into the void.

KABOOM!

WARNING: A CHALLENGER APPROACHES!

Once more, a figure appears before Blade. This time, it's a slightly older man than him, with short, dark hair, thin glasses, and a moustache, clad in a rather ominous-looking robe.

NEWCOMER
PARADOX

"...Fucking Final Destination." he grumbles.

Blade takes advantage of Paradox's inability to NOT be snarky and makes his move:

"B Down."

Blade's sword resumes its normal shape once more, only this time, it does not change form again. Instead, Blade swings it around so that the handle is facing down towards the ground rather than the blade.

Paradox instinctively reacts, dashing at his opponent, aiming straight for a cheap punch in the balls. But before he reaches, Blade slams the gem atop his sword's handle down into the ground; shockwaves ripple outward, catch Paradox, and send him sailing over the edge of the platform and plummeting to Earth.

KABOOM!

Blade spins his sword back around, satisfied with his victory.

Just then, however, all four of his prior opponents respawn. And they look angry...

Blade backs up, a look of nervousness on his face, until he bumps into something. He turns slightly...

It's a rainbow-colored circular object with a silver '+' running through it.

Blade grins and crushes the object in his hand; darkness befalls the field and a rainbow-colored aura envelops his body. He raises his sword to the sky; despite the darkness enveloping the field, his sword is glowing with a pure white light surrounded by an orange glow. The light seems to dim and flicker, then suck itself into a single blinding point of light at the sword's tip.

"OBLITERATION BEAM!"

With that warcry, Blade swings his sword in an arc, leaving a crescent trail of light in its wake. Blade swings the sword again, and another crescent forms. Another swing, another light crescent. Over and over and over, until a man-sized disc of light has been formed in front of Blade. He pulls his sword back and, with a yell of victory, he thrusts his sword forward; on contact with the disc, the light explodes outward into a gigantic white beam with an orange tint. The Final Smash slams into Paradox, Elf, Mikachu, and firepokemon, who are all juggled by the searing death beam for a good ten seconds before finally getting blasted into the stratosphere.

KABOOM!

KABOOM!

KABOOM!

KABOOM!

"GAME!"

-------------------------------------

Four-way Super Smash Bros. Brawl-whacked.

[Inferno_Dragon]

*Blademaster, Mikachu Yukitatsu, Crazy Elf Boy, firepokemon, and Master of Paradox are in a room just waiting. Each of them got an invention to meet in this room for a special presentation.*

"You think this is a trick?" Blademaster asks

"Well, if it is, all of us are easily prepared." Crazy Elf Boy says.

*The Door opens and in walks Inferno_Dragon with a bunch of tests. He snaps his fingers and decks appear from out of nowhere. Inferno_Dragon throws the test on the desks and walks to the blackboard which also appeared out of nowhere. He writes Hello My Name Is Inferno_Dragon and welcome to my classroom.*

"No, my voice is not gone. I just wanted to do that. Now this test is different from the ones I had punished other with. There are no misprints, no weird choices and no doppelgangers trying to kill you." Inferno Dragon says while the sounds of awwwsss is heard from the next classroom.

"So what do we have to do?" Blademaster asks.

"Yeah, is there some trick or trap?" Master of Paradox inquires.

"Nope, it is just a simple test. Sure it is 30 pages long with easy to expert question on most everything but there are no strings attached. So when I hit this bell which I also made appear out of nowhere, you may begin." Inferno_Dragon says.

*Inferno_Dragon hits a bell and all of them starts taking the test. Inferno_Dragon pulls out a novel (not War and Peace ... something sorter.) and starts reading. A couple hours later, all of the TPMers hand Inferno_Dragon their tests. Using a Test Scanner which also appeared out of nowhere, Inferno_Dragon smiles.*

"You all passed ... that means you can go to the party room down the hall." Inferno_Dragon says.

*Suddenly, all of them rush out of the room down towards the cafeteria. Crazy Elf Boy opens the door to see the cafeteria filled with wonderful foods and drinks. firepokemon heads towards the fondu area and starts pigging out.*

"I can't believe that Inferno_Dragon would be so nice to us. I mean this is a whacking game so where is the whack?" firepokemon said with his mouth full of melted cheese.

"Maybe the whack is that we will all have terrible tummy aches or the food is poisoned." Master of Paradox suggested.

"But we are prepared for everything. I even brought antacids and antidotes." Crazy Elf Boy said while pulling out a briefcase.

"Maybe he is just getting soft." Mikachu Yukitatsu said.

"Hey, he left us a parting present. Dear TPMers, I hope you have enjoyed your last meal because in twenty seconds, a atomic bomb will drop on you guys. It is a trap everybody leave." Blademaster said in a panic.

*As much as they tried, the cafeteria was sealed shut and no technology or magic could destroy the walls. No technology or magic worked so they escaped. Suddenly, a bomb tore through the ceiling and landed in the middle of the cafeteria. All of them approached it and waited it to go off. Suddenly, something popped out. It was a sign saying Late April Fools. All of them started laughing until firepokemon saw more writing which was smaller at the bottom. It said Or Not. Suddenly, there was a big explosion. Inferno_Dragon came into the cafeteria or what was left of it wearing a radiation suit. He look at the remains of the TPMers and chuckled.

"Seems like they got their just desserts." Inferno_Dragon said.

You all have been Nuclear Bomb whacked. (Boy that was not as easy as writing a single person whack but it is more fun to whack more than one person.)

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Mikachu Yukitatsu just noticed three things.

1. You're doing great with this game.

2. The title says 'Re: GAME: Whack-a-TPMer EXTREME M.A. T_M_L'...how on earth did I forget the 'Re'-part there?

3.

The classic, because EXTREME is going to bog itself down far too soon.

*throws Master of Paradox into a bog*

Master of Paradox, traditional, classic, one-target-whacked.

[firepokemon]

On a cold evening, where the land was sand and there was an empty feeling that came across firepokemon's face, a being appeared. This being peculiar in their own way, had precisely formed to deliver a whack to just one person. Was there an object to win the game? Firepokemon asked to himself. Why would someone do this? And was there an opportunity to whack that person?

With that firepokemon walked closer to this being and with a Mighty whack, whacked Mikachu Yukitatsu. Mikachu was bleeding from the head, delivering delicious blood rushing forth. Would Mikachu die? Firepokemon didn't care as he walked further into this ever-lasting desert.

It was getting colder and firepokemon felt a nervous sensation surrounding him, there he saw Blademaster. Blademaster was a big man, perhaps a bit stupid, firepokemon didn't know. But firepokemon was determined to whack this person. Blademaster initially try to fight firepokemon, albeit unsuccessfully. Blademaster may have been big but he was slow, and with a thud and a bang, Blademaster was whacked. Firepokemon saw Blademaster fall but he was looking ahead.

For there happened to be a legend in this land that spoke of a Dragon. Not an ordinary Dragon that roamed the land but rather an inferno_dragon. Inferno_Dragon was a formidable opponent but firepokemon saw that he could give this one a whack. Firepokemon screamed obscenities towards Inferno_Dragon, and finally opened up his staff and blew fire into the staff and with that he raised the staff in his hand.

Inferno_Dragon fought back breathing some type of wind out of his mouth, but firepokemon just stood for firepokemon knew wind only caused fire to spread. Firepokemon jumped in the air and with his fiery staff, let out a huge whack to Inferno_Dragon. Goodbye Inferno_Dragon, feeling a bit guilty for what he had done.

Firepokemon soon felt empty as no other adversaries seemed to appear. With that he folded down his staff, walked silently further read for whatever adversaries were sure to come. For in this cold desert land, there were adversaries everywhere. One thing for sure firepokemon knew was that he could damn well whack.

[Inferno_Dragon]

*Mikachu Yukitatsu and firepokemon step into a store with trading cards which I (Inferno_Dragon) own. Both of them ask for a bunch of trading cards. I say that they can have all the cards they want as long as they pull the cord next to them. Both of them pull the lever and the floor drops beneath them. Suddenly, they land on a mattress pad and see a lever. They both pull it and millions of trading cards land on them causing them to get squished.*

Mikachu Yukitatsu and firepokemon, you have been Trading Card Game Squish Whacked.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

A spaceship roamed across space and time with Mikachu Yukitatsu inside. "Who is the next random creature?" asked Mikachu Yukitatsu. "I have selected Crazy Elf Boy, in Australia, planet Earth." responded the computer. The ship reached Earth and landed right in Sydney airport. The Australians were puzzled and their prime minister came to make a contact with this alien who arrived. Noticed that Mikachu spoke clumsy English, the prime minister asked what he wanted.

"I only want a person named Crazy Elf Boy." answered Mikachu. This was aired in Australian television, and the prime minister himself asked anyone who uses the name Crazy Elf Boy to come. Within a day, Crazy Elf Boy arrived at the airport, interested what would happen.

Crazy Elf Boy and Mikachu Yukitatsu met. "I have found a meaning for my eternal life. It's to whack every single creature in the universe." told Mikachu. Crazy Elf Boy hadn't time to do anything when Mikachu slapped him on the face. Mikachu went back to his spaceship and blasted off. "The next target is near. firepokemon in New Zealand." said the computer.

Mikachu went to meet the goverment of New Zealand then. "I want a guy named firepokemon." he told. "A guy named firepokemon? That's a good joke! Ha ha ha!" laughed one of the ministers. "I want to be taken seriously." Mikachu said, threw a time bomb and run to his ship. Mikachu had time to leave the country and flew towards America while the whole New Zealand exploded.

Meanwhile, president Bush was worried about the spaceship closing. Then he remembered the local superheroes, Inferno_Dragon, Blademaster and Master of Paradox. He called them and soon they were flying towards the spaceship. Mikachu Yukitatsu sent a few missiles and destroyed them.

Crazy Elf Boy, firepokemon, Inferno_Dragon, Blademaster, Master of Paradox, whacked with someting like from Douglas Adams.

[Blademaster]

Crazy Elf Boy, firepokemon, Inferno_Dragon, Master of Paradox

Thanks for listing everybody in the game, Mikachu.

So, I have five targets... Well, since it's 3am, I'll play the laziness card and do something that ironically has never, EVER been done in this game: What was meant to be done in it.

I whack Master of Paradox.

I whack Mikachu Yukitatsu.

I whack firepokemon.

I whack Inferno_Dragon.

I whack Crazy Elf Boy.

***************************

Whacked.

Yes. That's it. Just 'whacked.' How utterly humiliating.


EDIT: Oh, yeah, how could I have forgotten my whacking emoticon?

[Andrew]

You know you're a self indulgent jerk with too much time when...

[firepokemon]

firepokemon whacks Andrew big time

Why hello again Blademaster and you die and be whacked

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

You know you're a self indulgent jerk with too much time when...

...you become Andrew. I myself shall never know if I'm a "self indulgent jerk with too much time"!

Andrew, impolitely-whacked.

[firepokemon]

Mikachu Yukitatsu I sentence you to be whacked

[Knight of Time]

Hmm, it's time for a new game of Atomic Bomberman, anyone want to play?

Crazy Elf Boy: Sure, but can I be the Red Bomberman, please?

Knight of Time: Actually, I wanted the red one, could you pick another colour please? The red one is my favourite.

Crazy Elf Boy: Sorry, I didn't know you liked the Red Bomberman so much KOT, I'll take the orange one then.

firepokemon: Well, since CEB stole the colour I wanted, I'll take the blue one.

Blademaster: Meh, I'll take the green one.

Master of Paradox: Could I have the yellow one?

Knight of Time: Sure, MoP. Someone want the purple one, so that we have a rainbow of Bombermen?

Mikachu Yukitatsu: I'll take the purple one if you don't mind, KOT.

Knight of Time: Okay, then it's settled. The other four Bombermen will be computer-controlled, and the scheme of choice...well, I think we should go for this one, there's a lot of skulls, so be careful not to pick any of them up, they could give your Bombermen some trouble.

As play begins, I, the Red Bomberman, am very lucky with the first brick I blow up, hidden in it is a rare Goldflame, which makes my bomb blasts have maximum range. Meanwhile, all four of the computer controlled Bombermen end up killing themselves because of horrible accidents, and with just us six, human controlled Bombermen left, everyone except mine gets a different disease, Crazy Elf Boy's Bomberman ends up literally going to the "bathroom", dropping bombs everywhere he walks, firepokemon's Bomberman suddenly finds himself unable to drop any bombs, MoP's Bomberman ends up getting his controls reversed, which annoys him a lot, Mikachu's Bomberman finds his Bomberman suddenly gets as slow as molasses, and finally, Blademaster's Bomberman ends up getting short-fused bombs. About a minute later, my Bomberman finds a blue hand powerup, which enables him to grab, carry, and throw his bombs, and he finally touches a skull which makes his Bomberman get the same disease that Crazy Elf Boy's Bomberman had, but instead of making "droppings" as he moves, my Bomberman ends up "throwing up" all his bombs (5 at a time) and having them explode quickly because of the short fuse he got too, and he goes around, and touches all the remaining, undiseased Bombermen, who end up killing themselves because of their quick "droppings".

I Win

You all got Bomberman whacked.

[Blademaster]

Blademaster scratches his head and looks down onto the field, pondering his next move.

"So, Andrew and Kyle have joined..." he muses, rubbing his stubbly chin. That makes a total of seven other 'players.'

Getting an idea, Blademaster takes out his cell phone and dials a number.

"...Dante? Yeah, it's me. I need to enlist your... elite agents. ...Oh, it's just for a little game... Yes, yes, I KNOW you're busy, but you can let them take a few minutes off work, can't you? ...Ugh, you're worse than a loan shark, you know that? You've got a deal. ...Good. Send them to these locations..."

Blademaster lists several different coordinates, and then hangs up and sits back, waiting for the show to begin...

*********************

Two minutes later...

FINLAND

Mikachu stumbles backwards in wide-eyed fear as a short, stout humanoid with beady eyes, a gorilla-like limb structure, and a broad, toothy grin, clad in all black breaks through his wall.

"Hungry..." the creature says with a maniacal grin. "Need FOOD!"

A scream echoes out of Mikachu's house; blood splatters against his wall and windows shortly before his waning screams are drowned out by grotesque sounds of chewing and crunching.

BRISBANE

Andrew glares across his living room at his unwelcome visitor: a tall, bearded man with an eyepatch, clad in some sort of a militant uniform.

"Who are you, and why are you in my fucking house?" Andrew demands.

The man merely smiles and draws a court sword from his sheath.

"Wh-"

CHNK!

Andrew's mouth barely opens to speak before the tip of the coursword is through it and out the back of his neck.

NEW ZEALAND

Firepokemon lays in his bed, reading a magazine, when the door flies open and in steps a ravishing woman with a shapely body, flowing black hair, and a low-cut dress revealing the top halves of her breasts, situated between which is an odd tattoo...

"Hey, who the fuck are you!?" firepokemon demands, bolting up.

The woman merely smiles seductively and sashays up to his bed, placing a finger on his chest...

And then, like rubber, her finger elongates into a thin spear that shoots right through the man's heart, then retracts.

Firepokemon's eyes widen; he looks down at the blood-spurting hole in his torso, then back up at the woman; she winks and blows him a kiss just before his eyes roll back in his head and he slumps over, dead.

CANADA

Knight of Time is sitting in his living room, playing The Wind Waker, when a voice behind him speaks up:

"Nice place you got here..."

Knight of Time drops his controller and spins around, seeing a lanky man in a black, open jacket, black jeans, and shades. His hair is short and jet-black, and seems unnaturally jagged... just like his teeth.

"Who are you?!" Knight of Time asks, his heart pounding.

"That ain't your business, pal." the man replies snidely. "Just gimme all your money and I won't hurt you... much."

"And if I refuse...?" Knight of Time replies, his eyes narrowing.

"Well, if you refuse... I do... this." the man replies, pounding his fists together; upon contact, his knuckles turn a dull cobalt, which spreads and encompasses his arms, vaporizing his jacket and coating his formerly-lanky form with muscle, before finally enveloping his head, leaving it bald and fanged, with glowing red eyes. Before Knight of Time can even blink, the golem lunges forward and grabs his head in one hand, crushing it between his fingers as though it were a peach.

MINNESOTA

Master of Paradox is at home, browsing websites on his computer, when a young boy in a black T-shirt and shorts enters the room, grinning a fanged grin.

"Play with me!" he demands.

Master of Paradox looks over at the boy, then back at his monitor.

"No. Go play by yourself."

The boy sulks and presses his hands together.

"Fine." he huffs, pressing his hands to the side of Paradox's computer. A blue flash eminates from his hands, and then the monitor, the screen of which warps and shoots outward, spearing two sharp extensions of itself through Paradox's eyes.

AUSTRALIA

Crazy Elf Boy is in his bathtub. It's been a long day, and it's good to finally get a chance to relax...

Unfortunately for Elf, he's not exactly relaxed. In fact, he's down right horrified by the amorphous mass that has formed out of the bathwater in front of him, quickly taking the shape of the upper half of a woman with brown hair and ruby-red lipstick, clad in a purple dress and gloves.

"Don't forget to clean behind your ears..." the woman says in a motherly voice.

before Elf can reply, the water dripping onto his ears from his hair suddenly begins to cool. The chill spreads across his body, and seconds later, he's totally frozen - inside and out.

The woman smirks; one of her hands turns clear and liquid, then takes the shape of a transparent hammer that smashes Elf in the chest.

A noise like a great statue of glass shattering rings throughout the house.

??????????

Inferno_Dragon, bastard that he is, doesn't have a location in his profile, so who knows what he's doing. But in the midst of it, a teenage figure with wild, palm tree-like hair and a voice and body of indeterminate gender interrupted him.

"What the...?!" Inferno gasped.

Before he can think of anything to ask, Inferno is silenced by the sight of the figure transforming into a huge, green, snake-like dragon - and then biting his head clean off and swallowing it whole.

----------------------------------------

Seven Homunculi-whacked.

[firepokemon]

It was a cold cloudy night when three men appeared. One man who around these lands is called, the mighty "Knight of Time" briskly walked in. His shoulders a magnificent size and he began to eye up his two competitors. The second man, "Blademaster" renowned for his delicious use of blades also appeared and his left shifty eye stared at this competitors. The third man walked in, slightly queer in a pastel pink appeared blowing kisses at his two competitors. The three men eyed up each other.

Ladies and Gentlemen these three men will fight till the death and only one man will survive this competition. Using anything that they can get their hands on, there are no rules, the only rule is that two must die. Three is clearly optional.

Why were these three men here to fight and to fight till the death? For you see each of these men committed crimes so disturbingly wrong that this could be the only option. In Blademaster's case it was the act of Murder, which he committed against his three brothers. The four brothers were having a game of drinking, when the three younger brothers clearly drunk and off their face, came to be talking about the times when they would meet at a club and find the one young girl, innocently beautiful and mostly naive. The three men predatory in their own ways, would insist on buying these young girls many drinks. Soon as the club began to close, the three men would sweep the girl away. Where unimaginable things would happen. Blademaster was a wise man, a man that believed in the justices of the land, and thus he felt he had no choice. He loved his three brothers but they had to die. This was the justice of the land. And so as the three men much like the innocent girls they preyed on began to get drunker and drunker, it was time for death. Blademaster used his fire blade and with one quick swoop, his three brothers were killed. The injustice of course, that this would bring him to the death court, to fight against two other men where one, just one would survive.

Knight of Time was a master swordsman, known for his super ability to kill several men all in one swooping sword motion. So therefore, it begs the question why was such a person here fighting to the death? His story of course is that of love. At eighteen he had fallen in love with a beautiful girl with long blonde locks and cheerful eyes that invited men in. She was one lovely girl, and she too fell in love with Knight of Time. But she too, fell in love with several other men. Knight of Time discovered this one night, as he began to look for the love of his love, and there he found her giving sweet blowjobs to another man. Now Knightoftime was strong and wise and a noble man. And therefore, he could never kill the women he fell in love with, he could however, kill the man. The man just happened to be his second cousin, but to do what he just did meant the second cousin had to die. Now this cousin was a good swordsman himself, and so Knightoftime and the cousin fought for several minutes, but alas, it was the end when with one swift stroke of the sword, the cousins penis fell off and then he was stabbed in the chest. Such a wicked crime had Knightoftime committed, that men around his land winced and stared at their own penises.

The third man, firepokemon was not well known and in time his illegal act would be recognised as perfectly legal. But it so happened, that firepokemon was into men, big burly men, noble Kings and princes was firepokemon’s ultimate prize. And thus firepokemon was in the fight till death for the simple crime of buggery.

Alright men, begin the fight.

The men began their fight with firepokemon holding back while Knight of Time and Blademaster began a fight till the death. Knight of Time swung his sword round but Bladmaster had two huge blades in his hands, and the sword was blocked. Blademaster then swung those blades over Knight of Time and quickly went for firepokemon. Firepokemon simply blew a kiss and Blademaster fell back confused. Firepokemon then pounced on Blademaster and whacked him big time with his faggoty hands and then threw out a simple pocketknife and stabbed him in the heart. Blademaster was dead.

Next firepokemon turned to Knight of Time and Knight Of Time followed with a shark sword stroke that hit firepokemon in the arm, but firepokemon was not scared and simply jumped forward onto Knight of Time and with one fast swoop Knight of Time was whacked and dead.

Yes this was a shitty story but an appropriate one for the whacking game and with it, the lives of Blademaster and Knight of Time were lost forever. “Goodbye” firepokemon said as he looked for another sexy prince for whom he could commit buggery with.

[Knight of Time]

Ooh, I've been waiting to do this for a while, but anyway...

firepokemon, I hear you like battling with Pokemon, so I'd like you to meet my friends, waterpokemon, rockpokemon and groundpokemon.

'Watches as waterpokemon uses Hydro Cannon on you, followed by a Rock Wrecker from rockpokemon, and finally, groundpokemon uses a Fissure on you, combined, your flames go out so fast, they all say "Man, you blow!"'

Type advantage-whacked.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

The following song isn't meant to be a personal insult, it mainly copies a poem in a novel named Seitsemän Veljestä (Seven Brothers) by Aleksis Kivi, a Finnish writer.

Kiljukoon nyt kaikkein kaula,
Let everyone's neck scream now,
koska mielin virren laulaa
because I want to sing a hymn
voimasta seitsemän TPMerin.
about the strength of seven TPMers.

Tähtiä kuin otavassa,
Like stars in Big Dipper
jäseniä on Whack-a-TPMerissä,
there are members in Whack-a-TPMer,
plus Mikachu Yukitatsu.
plus Mikachu Yukitatsu.

Blademaster pauhaa, pirtti roikaa;
Blademaster rants, the cabin echoes;
hän on talon aika poika,
he is the rather son of the house,
ankara "Poika-Blade".
cruel "Boy-Blade".

Andrew seisoo niinkuin tammi,
Andrew stands like an oak,
koska saarnaa firepokemon,
when firepokemon preaches,
TPMn Salomon suuri.
TPM's Salomon the great.

Inferno_Dragon, liuhuparta,
Inferno_Dragon, flapping beard,
valittaa se "ihmisparka,
condoles he "the poor human,
syntinen, saatana, kurja".
sinner, devil, poor".

Inferno_Dragon herneet keittää,
Inferno_Dragon boils the peas,
Master of Paradox sekaan rasvat heittää,
Master of Paradox throws the grease in,
patahan kuohuvaan sylkee.
spits to the foaming pot.

Knight of Time-poika metsäs häärii,
Knight of Time-boy bustles in a forest,
katselevi puita väärii,
looks at the crooked trees,
mäyränä nummia tonkii.
digs the moors like a badger.

Viimein tulee hännän huippu,
At last the tip of tail comes,
Pikku-Crazy Elf Boy, liukas luikku,
The small Crazy Elf Boy, slippery slip,
TPMn tiuskea rakki.
The snappy dog of TPM.

Siinä onpi velisarja,
There's the brother chain,
jalo niinkuin sonnikarja,
noble as a cattle of bulls,
voimalla seitsemän TPMerin.
with the strength of seven TPMers.

Blademaster, Andrew, firepokemon, Inferno_Dragon, Master of Paradox, Knight of Time, Crazy Elf Boy, whacked by the mockery song 'Seitsemän miehen voima' (Strength of Seven Men).

[firepokemon]

firepokemon looks at Mikachu Yukitatsu and they have a stare down and then firepokemon whacks Mikachu Yukitatsu. Firepokemon is then confronted with another person Knight of Time and they proceed to have a staredown where Knight of Time is promptly whacked.