[GAME] Twisted Wishes v.9 (LV Approved)

[Fett One]

Granted but now that Pikachu is gone the show ends and you become the most hated man in the world for ruining pokemon.

I wish to be able to fluently speak all known languages.

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but your fluency in English steadily decreases with each new language you learn, making it harder and harder for you to communicate with people whose first language is English.

I wish I could buy just about anything I want without going too deep into the red (aka going into debt) or being accused of stealing.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted but now you are accused for murder everyday for finishing too many creatures in videogames.

I wish I could finish my Super Mario Galaxy 2 file 100%.

[Fett One]

Granted but the game crashes immediately after causing you to lose all your data and thus having to start all over again from scratch.

I wish dunsparce was a more useful pokemon in battles.

[Knight of Time]

Granted. As a result, everyone uses Dunsparce in battles, and the only wild Pokemon you can find are Dunsparce, who unlike the other trainers' Dunsparce you face, only know Rage, and on top of that, Rage is broken on all the Dunsparce you can catch, as their Attack stat never rises with each hit they take.

I wish more of the useless Pokemon had much better stats.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but now all those Pokemon that used to be useful have bad stats.

I wish I could eat what I want without gaining weight.

[Fett One]

Granted but everyone around you gains the weight that you should have gained.

I wish the new Star Trek tv show would air on broadcast television instead of CBS's private site.

[Knight of Time]

Granted. It airs on a channel only available through digital cable, but the cost of the channel is 1000 times the price of the receiver that would bring you digital cable.

I wish colds couldn't be spread from person to person.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted. Now colds spread from person to animals and, in turn, from animals to person. A notable difference is that the effect of the cold is doubled.

I wish earthquakes could be predicted easily.

[Fett One]

Granted, they are now easier to detect but all other natural disasters become impossible to detect.

I wish for a Mario/Link crossover game.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted. The game is just like Pong, Mario being one block and Link the other.

I wish for Knight of Time's autograph.

[Fett One]

Granted but it turns out to be a forgery made by Blademaster.

I wish the pokemon games would allow you to use 8 pokemon instead of 6.

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but as a result all 8 of your Pokemon must share the same type and/or same weakness(es), requiring you to take extra caution in areas containing trainers with several different types of Pokemon.

I wish I had the next person's autog-g-g...autog-g-g-g...John Hancock (and if the next person can guess what movie I was making a reference to, I'll give you a VM afterward).

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, I give you my autograph in Japanese characters but I incidentally misspelled it so it can't be pronounced in the right way.

I have seen a move called Hancock, but I just don't remember the quote.

I wish I could take part in a cosplay event.

[Fett One]

Is the movie A Fish Called Wanda?

Granted but an unforeseen circumstance ruins your costume forcing you to go as yourself.

I wish for a movie that has James Bond team up with Austin Powers.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but the movie flops because it features them trying to play a tag tournament of your least favourite videogame.

I wish I was faster to read books.

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but your increased reading speed causes the words to fly out of the books as you read them, making them readable only once.

I wish it was easier to make new friends on Facebook when sending them the first message rather than sending a friend request.

[Fett One]

Granted but people spam this method causing you to end up with millions of friends, forcing you to give up Facebook just to get away from the news feed onslaught.

I wish time travel was truly impossible so no one would ever have to deal with time paradoxes.

[CaptainJigglypuff]

Granted. Then a Tardis falls on top of you and crushes you to death.

I wish I had a new microwave!

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted. It causes cancer.

I wish to come up with the best birthday present ever for CaptainJigglypuff.

[CaptainJigglypuff]

Granted. You give me all your money, your family's money, your house, all your credit cards and full access to all the bank accounts in your family, Natalie Portman's head on a silver platter, all your video gamesandconsoles, everything you own including all Pokemon merchandise, and Norway. And then I take your soul!

I wish for a fluffy Yorkie puppy!

[Knight of Time]

Granted. But it turns out to be a mutant fluffy Yorkie puppy, which makes you HIS pet, forcing you to adapt to his needs 24/7 or be eaten alive.

I wish at least one of the Zonks from the present-day version of Let's Make a Deal would make a "guest" appearance on The Price is Right someday.

[Fett One]

Granted but the appearance causes viewers to get confused which causes them to stop watching, causing both shows to be canceled.

I wish Dr. Strange would team-up with Dr. Who for a mission to save the Earth.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted but this happens in another dimension and you'll never see it.

I wish for a cup of tea.

[Knight of Time]

Granted. You get a cup containing tea bags that were left in it for several months, but by the time you add some hot water and drink the tea, you eventually come to realize your tea has gone bad...REALLY bad.

I wish there was a game in GGG made about TPMers' favourite memories here.

[Fett One]

Granted but all of the memories are of bad things that happened to over members.

I wish allergies didn't exist.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted. Instead of being allergic to fish people now can't eat them because they taste awful.

I wish TPM got 100 new members tomorrow.

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but they're all re-regs of the same person with the most severe case of autism ever to have been discovered.

I wish there was a Born Loser book with many of the comics from this series in it showing Brutus Thornapple's stupidest moments and/or Rancid Veeblefester's funniest insults directed at Thornapple (and incase any of you are wondering, yes, I am a fan of this comic strip; I get a real kick out of them).

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but you suddenly start thinking those insults are directed at you.

I wish I could be nicer to people.

[Fett One]

Granted, you become nicer to people but you also become crueler to animals.

I wish for a movie that has Marvel's Captain Marvel teaming up with DC's Captain Marvel.

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but the movie brings up so much confusion about which Captain Marvel is which, causing it to be a box office flop.

I wish I was better at charming women.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but you become only better at charming women you don't like.

I wish I was Digi-Destined!

[Fett One]

Granted. You become a Digi-Destined but only after the big bad is defeated so you don't get to go on an adventure.

I wish Marvel would make a Spider-Man 2099 movie.

[Knight of Time]

Granted. But the movie isn't released until 2099, and I'm fairly sure we'll all be dead by then.

I wish I could turn sand dollars at the beach into real dollars (money).

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but every single person on the planet is given the same ability, which leads to global inflation.

I wish the financial crisis were easier to solve.

[Fett One]

Granted but every other problem in the world becomes ten times harder to solve.

I wish WB would make a really good Batman/Superman movie.

[Knight of Time]

Granted, but it becomes too good enough for Warner Brothers to release it, and as such, the movie becomes 100% private, with only employees of Warner Brothers allowed to see it.

I wish there was no such thing as a person who thinks they're better than everyone else.

[Mikachu Yukitatsu]

Granted, but now people are completely without self-confidence.

I wish all my wishes came true.

[Fett One]

Granted but now no one else wishes come true, which causes people to revolt against you.

I wish Superman would finally kneel before Zod.

[Knight of Time]

Granted. But Superman clones himself beforehand and exchanges places with the clone, and when the clone kneels before Zod, the clone disintegrates itself and Zod is left speechless as to what happened.

I wish there were less of the "bad" wishes made here (after all, trying to counter it with something "good" isn't always easy).