A Fantastic Dream

[Zup]

I've decided to try and write again, and I want some input on how well this is going. I'll add chapters if this garners the response I need to motivate me. For the first time, this is not about Pokemon, lol. So please, critigue me all you want. I'd like to know my weak points as a writer.


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A Fantastic Dream
-Zup


Prologue


Come to us…
See the light…
The truth is waiting…
We…are waiting…

Andrew awoke with a start. Eyes blinking open, he saw nothing but darkness. Shaking his head clear, the last vestiges of his dream faded into reality. For the fourth time this week, Andrew could not remember his dream. He ran his hand through his short brown hair before remembering that it was still Friday night.

“No school tomorrow…” he mused, rubbing his slightly scruffy chin. He hadn’t shaved since Thursday, and it showed. “I’d better get back to sleep. Mom’ll want me up before noon, like last weekend.” Andrew rolled his eyes. On a weekend, sleeping was a main priority. Then came slacking, then loafing, and goofing off. He ended his day with last minute homework.

Realizing that he was still awake (something that bothered him), Andrew began to ponder what he was going to do on Saturday. “I’ll play videogames, download some MP3s, watch a movie…aw damn.” Andrew groaned. “I’ve got Humanities homework to do this weekend.” Humanities, although one of Andrew’s favorite classes, had some of the most exhaustive homework known to mankind. Or, at least the mankind that attended Elkhorne, Oregon’s Suntari High School.

Andrew closed his eyes, now not looking forward to the next day. As he did, the voices began in earnest. He started shaking as he fell asleep, experiencing the Dream again.

The sun was glaring down at him, which was weird, because Andrew had closed the blinds before he went to bed. Opening his unadjusted eyes to the bright light proved too much and it took a few seconds to regain any semblance of vision. When he did, Andrew wished he hadn’t. Instead of lying on his California King, he was sprawled on a mossy rock. His house was nowhere in plain sight and the sinister sun beat down on him, showing nearly no shade for virtually miles.

If he focused, he could nearly make out someone’s voice.

…ome to u…

“Hello?” He yelled, hearing his echo.

…e ligh…

“Anyone there?” he shouted in vain.

…ruth is waiti…

“Ruth? Who’s Ruth?” He asked, screaming his lungs out.

…are waitin…

“Where? Where is Ruth?” He shrieked, thoroughly freaked out. A mysterious voice was telling him something. And he couldn’t understand.

And then he awoke, in a cold sweat.

And he remembered.

[PancaKe]

Wow! I think I remember you! The name sounds AWFULLY familiar!! (by the way ,, I was formerly known as Mist)

What can I say? Bit short, bit over the place. Nice introduction however, bit of character building is always good at the beginning of a fic. Could work really well for you, its a good start

Lets see how this goes.

Nice job

[Zup]

Mist....hmm....Yeah, I remember you. Living in Pichu's House or something like that. I was a big fan, lol.

The prologue is rather short, yes, but it's just to set the scene. The first chapter will be relatively long, at least I hope. I plan to write a lot more than I have in the past too.